The starter was rich vegetable soup. Hot spiciness warmed my insides, seeping down and removing the last of the chill from my journey from my bones. Carrots, spinach, chick peas and paprika, then sweet potatoes and hints of garlic melded together as I swallowed. I nodded , then stepped back and allowed His Majesty, the King, to eat.1
The King rolled back his splendid sleeves, embroidered in soft blues and vibrant gold, with red intertwined over the fabric. He took a dainty sip from his spoon and the rest of his guests followed suit.2
I stood back in the shadows, waiting for the course to finish. My mouth watered just at the thought of some more of that soup, a tiny taste of which still lingered on my tongue, warm and spicy. I longed to step forward, grab a bowl, and drain the whole lot, but I stayed perfectly still, sniffing the delicate, exotic scents drifting in the silver steam.3
When the soup was finally cleared, the next course was brought on. Stuffed, roasted pheasants in a creamy white sauce, with black olives from Spain and a garland of spices from the Caribbean. Again, I was called forth and ordered to taste some of the meat.4
It was even more tasty than the first course. The meat was tender and succulent, with very little blubber, and plenty of flavour. Salt melded in and out of the paprika, black pepper corns, rosemary, and many other spices I couldn’t name. The sauce, salted, tingled on my lips as I swallowed, and speared a piece of broccoli. It was deliciously juicy, with a warm, bland flavour and a wonderfully rough texture. The potatoes were dripping with slippery butter and silky on my tongue. Reluctantly, I once again drew back to watch in mouth-watering discontent as the guests continued their meals.5
Third course. A pasta in a tomato sauce, baked with cheese and tuna fish for long hours in the warm ovens. Slices of rye bread joined this course, soaked with another kind of sauce, basil this time, melting in the mouth. The pasta had been cooked to perfection, perfectly soft while not being soggy, and the sauce had a tangy, meaty flavour that clung to my lips as I drew back yet again, longing for another taste.6
The fourth course was a golden pie, with thick, moist pastry, melting on my tongue, and gorgeous pink meat. Hard boiled eggs were buried like little treasures throughout and it was accompanied by a thick, rich gravy, steaming and so hot I almost burned my tongue.7
Finally came the last course. A crème de la fresche with cocoa beans and vast amounts of sticky molasses. Toffied apple pieces were riddled through it, like tiny sweets, and every second it was in my mouth was a joy. Delicious warmth flooded through me, followed by an odd chill. Wondering if the strong wine that I had tested with every course was finally affecting me, I swayed and put aside the plate. Eyes turned to me and the conversation lulled to an abrupt stop.8
“What’s the matter boy?” asked the King's heavy voice beside me. I blinked. The dining hall, in all it’s splendour, was beginning to fade before my very eyes, the shadows increasing and the candles flickering into blackness. My knees weakened and I dropped my silver spoon to the floor with a loud clatter. My body soon followed as pain spread through me, sickening me and fanning out like tongues of flame.9
There was a babble of nonsensical voices above me, loud and nervous chatter, and then a woman screamed. “He’s dead!”10
The outcry was taken up throughout the room and I could hear chairs being knocked over as guests made a scramble to get away from me.11
“Nonsense!” boomed the king. “He’s just had a little too much wine. Servant, get him to his chamber and bring me another taster. On second thoughts, cancel that. Ruddy waste of our time anyway.” He laughed loudly. “After all, who’s going to attempt to poison us?” 12
There were a few nervous titters and then a general silence as a couple of servants lifted me from my position on the floor and bore me away downstairs.13
They laid me on my bed and left me, most likely believing the king when he told them it was an overdose of wine. But when I thought back to it, I knew… It wasn’t an enemy of the king that was attempting to poison the whole court. It was the king himself.14
Author notes
IDK why this ended up like it did but I like it ^_^! Enjoy pplz. I wanna thank the awesome contest for my inspiration on this one! 
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Contest: I read Star Pictures by Fingle Thrower (and it was great!) Thanks for the awesome contest
ZackTruel: IDK if this is quite 'setting a scene' but I thought I'd give it a shot. After all... it's kind of settings. Anyway, thanks 
A contest entry
- What's Taters, Precious, huh? What's Taters? by Valkyrie.
800 points, ended October 10, 2008, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Under A Sky That Knows No Stars [[Imagery Contest]] by Toxic Paradox.
600 points, ended October 14, 2008, 18 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Setting by ZackTruel.
200 points, ended October 31, 2008, 14 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Imagination by MidniteRockers.
370 points, ended December 17, 2008, 107 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrites, Rain, love,hate, poems, Milk...chips...turkey..man im so hungry! Twisted tales...Cheese...IM HUNGRY OKAY! by Princess Dawn.
150 points, ended December 1, 2008, 18 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Anything that you can think of (no sex or content like that) by Payne.
130 points, ended January 1, 33 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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you are extremely talented
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Thanks very much
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Mommy
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Yesh ^^ ME XD
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OMG!
A brilliant desciption of the foods. I love it !! One of the best stories so far.
Good luck
Lolly x -
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Thanks so much I'm soooooooo glad you liked it! ^^ thanks again!
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Wow great work! Yes this is a great portrayel of setting. The food is a main part of the scene at a feast, so it is just as important as the peoples clothes or a dining hall description. Great work on all the vibrant adjectives used in this story. Greta work and good luck on the contest!
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Thanks very much, I'm so glad you liked it. Thanks very much for the bronze , really appreciated!
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excellent humour
I enjoyed this piece immensely. I thought you pitched the food descriptions perfectly, allowing the contrast to the end play turn tasty (pardon the pun).
I felt, in places, you needed to get the "historical" dialogue sorted out (one example is presented in my edit-comments below).
I love your effort at trying to describe in a variety of ways the satisfaction of the food, including their textures, flavours, etc. Perhaps they need a little bit of tightening here and there, and watching that you don't overdo simile and metaphor when they don't work perfectly.
Here are some edit-comments. Please note I'm being pedantic here, trying to help you push your work to the max.
para 1 - I think "his Majesty" should be "His Majesty". king may need capitalizing too.
para 2 - "his spoon" is perhaps better.
para 3 - "step forwards" should drop the "s". "on the silver steam"? - not sure it works; perhaps "in"?
para 4 - you repeat the word "course" when I think the second is redundant - just leave it out.
para 5 - need a comma after "rosemary" - I think the sentence has a pretty nice flow, but not sure about the logic of "salt wove". "meal" at the end should be "meals" to match the "guests".
para 6 - "another kind of sauce" - a bit mean to not describe this one! Not sure you can cook anything for long hours in a "hot" oven - perhaps a warm oven.
para 8 - not sure about "Toffied" as being a real word, but what the hell, it works! "lulled to a stop abruptly" - perhaps "lulled to an abrupt stop".
para 9 - "kings heavy voice" - should be "king's heavy voice".
para 12 - "anyway" should have a full stop. I think the sentence "I mean," is a bit modern, for the atmosphere of a medieval king.
para 14 - don't need "too" after "wine".
Overall, a fine, original piece. Enjoyed every moment!
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Wow, thanks so much!!!!! I really like getting critisisms to go with the praise; it's so helpful.. I'll be making corrections and changes as soon as I have time. . I think toffied is a word, lol, but I'll look it up. If not, I shall add it to my personal dictionary. Thanks so much!!!!
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This is a very fun little short. Have you ever considered getting a day job doing menu descriptions for restaurants? Seriously, you made me hungry all over again and I just ate! It may just be the perversity of my own personality, but I especially love how it ends. Maybe I've just been reading too much Seutonius-derived stuff lately...
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Hehe, thanks very much. lol, I've never thought about it really
but nice idea. I actually don't like food very much, so this was quite interesting . Thanks!
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Fantastic!
I just joined a society at University called 'the food appreciation society', so I can safely say that this is one of my favourite topics so far! Thanks for entering my contest with your feast of adjectives.
I really liked the imagery of the food and I felt a complete empathy for the hungry servant taster. I also got the impression that he was a clever chap - after all, it was he who figured out the King's game.
However... I would have liked to see a little more background information. Perhaps between courses your character could think about maybe why he took the notoriously dangerous tasting job in the first place, or how far he has travelled to be there and through what weather etc?
Also, while the food imagery is truly delicious, the final part seems quite rushed through. Perhaps, if you get chance to look over this again, you could consider expanding on the feelings of sickness - somehow link the imagery of that wonderful dessert with the ill feelings - perhaps by suggesting that the toffied apple had a 'dark delicacy' or suchlike? This would then clarify to the audience that it was the dessert that did it, or if it was a subtle poison in all of the dishes you could make reference to that fact that spices were often used to cover te taste of poisonous berries.
Those short few lines about the taster feeling ill could easily be opened up and expanded, and the final few lines about the King's dastardly wishes could definitely use some prior mention. Perhaps, if you DID talk about the taster's life, you could mention the rumours of the King's vicious temper, or his jealous attitude towards his wife, and then draw in a fragment about a courtier rumoured to have had his way with the Queen. I just think that this is a highly interesting point which could turn the story from very good (which it already is) to absolutely incredibly good.
I'm sorry this is such a long note; when I see a piece I genuinely like my imagination goes into hyperdrive and I end up throwing ideas at the author. However, all of these ARE just ideas, and for the purposes of my contest this story is fine as it is.
Thank you very much once again for entering my contest, and for following my rules. -
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Wow, that has to be the longest comment I have ever recieved, and most likely one of the most helpful!!! Thanks so much for your pointers, ideas and advice! I would love to expand this; for the original purpose of which it was written, it was fine just as this, but I think I should definitely explore it further. Haha, the irony is; I don't even really like food myself. lol. Anyway, thanks so so so much.
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YAY! this is excellent! *drools* mmmmmmm food.....tuna, potatos, gravy, toffee apple, pie.....wait pie! PIE! YAY! PIE! piepiepiepiepie.... *drools some more*
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Hehe, fooooooooooooood. Glad you likies . *gives heaps of pie*
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This is actually pretty interesting and cool. Well written and great detail. I like how you ended it, good job!
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Lol, the ending was a sort of 'spur of the moment' thing... though many are, and I'm glad you liked it. ^_^! Thanks very much for reading.
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Oh my. You were inspired by that picture up top on my contest, weren't you? Yes, I can see it clearly. The feast you described was exactly the kind I was envisioning when I went hunting for pix.
And wow, your food was tasty. You had me eating out of your...story. 
*burp* Excuse me.
This is a great story, too. You went over the food in minute detail, savoring each word and making them drip with description.
And the way you ended it, the poor taster doesn't actually die, nor do you say he will for sure. You could turn this into a chaptered story, even, if the poor kid somehow lived. I'd so read that. A lovely mystery...why would a king want to kill a taster? And what a clever way to do it, too!
I have here some minor notes on the story writing itself:
P1 from my journey from - two froms make it a little repetitive
P8 toffied = toffeed, but I had to look it up to be sure
did you really mean tested, about the strong wine in this paragraph, or tasted?
P9 king's
it's doesn't need an apostrophe
So clapping for this. Very very good.
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I'm really glad you like this. Lol, when I wrote toffied I wondered if I'd spelt it right, but Ihad no time to proof read it, I just wrote it and posted. Thanks for the corrections, I'll fix them as soon as I have a moment ^_^!
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