Torrent Of Rage Part I: Jared

I vaugely wonder why I am lying in a pool of my own blood. I hadn't enough common sense to really move. My breathing was slow and even. I let a quick breath escape me as realization strikes me.1

OH GOD...HE'S GONE.2

I slowly stand, my head spinning in confusion. I look around, wishing he were here with me. He wasn't.3

I look down at the blood stained linoleum floor. I still couldn'y recall how I had gotten on the floor, nor how I had begun bleeding. I rushed down the hall, and found myself in the bathroom. I examined myself in mirror, and a gasped escaped me.4

By now, there was a throbbing in my head above my eyebrow, and in the mirror, I could certainly see why. My appearence was horribly grotesque.5

The left side of my face was caked in blood. The Source? A large cut over my left eye. I had circles under my blue eyes. This was due to my insomnia. I looked Vampric. I laughed at the thought.6

My dark brown hair was now stained red from the blood I had een lying in. My pale, white skin looked even paler under the dim lighting of the bathroom.7

Yes. I looked Horrible.8

I felt no anger. Only utter confusion. I could not recall what had happened. All I knew, though I hated that fact, was that HE was not here with me. Where was he? Why wasn't he here to help me clean up? He didn't even know I had been attacked!9

ATTACK, the word had just come to me...and it seemed to click. Yes, I had been attacked, and my brain went into overdrive.10

HE, Jared had attacked me. Jared had gotten angry. I suddenly remembered it all now. He was angry last night, and he had slammed my head into the stove. After that, I suppose I was sent into unconciousness.11

The fact that Jared had, yet again, caused my lack of conciousness did not bother me. This had happened before, what was different? I smiled slightly, the mystery of my...bloody awakening solved.12

I sighed, undressed, and hopped into the shower. When I was finished, I dried and put my hair up. Unconciously, I looked in the full length mirror on the door. I examined my naked body, and it was here, that I felt tears well up.13

My body was covered in bruises and scars. All over my back, all over my chest. My arms, my legs. Nothing was left unblimished. Nothing had escaped Jared's torrent of rage.14

I felt anger for myself. Why should I cry? What good would it do? What could I do? Nothing. I could do nothing, and this echoed through the tattered cinfines of my mind. I could do nothing, because I was: Nothing.15

I continued through the house, cleaning the remnants of Jared's anger away. Everything would be perfect. Jared expected perfection. I could not let him get angry again.16

Jared's voice surprised me. He came through the doo, throwing his things upon the ground. DAMNIT, I thought bitterly, I JUST CLEANED THAT.17

"Hello Trinity, how are you, love?"18

I smiled weakly. "I'm okay" No I'm not, I was so far from okay, I was in another galaxy.19

"Good." His lips pressed to mine silently. I kissed him back, but reluctantly. I couldn't tell if this was true love, or if I was being used.20

"And him?" His hand went to my bulging stomache.21

"He's fine, I'm sure" I smiled weakly. Jared could have killed our child. And our wedding was in two weeks! What was I supposed to do about that???22

He sat in the recliner, and gestured for me to sit on his lap. Slowly, I sat down. It was then, that I saw the scars. He'd been cutting.23

"Babe," I said tentively, "I asked you to stop that. It's hurting you" He laughed and pulled out a cigarette from his chest pocket. His blue eyes were dancing now, anger was coming. He lit the smoke.24

"You also asked me to stop smoking, didn't you? Look how well I listen" He blew the smoke in my face. I coughed, and stood. I was getting a little irritated now. I guess that the fight we had last night meant nothing.25

The fight we had last night had been about his smoking, and he flipped. He didn't want me to run his life. What good was I now?26

"We need to talk Trin, we do" His english accent always caught me off guard. Was he angry?27

"I need to know, Trinity Ann. Where were you last night?" My fear sky-rocketed. 28

In truth, he was making sure I hadn't been cheating, he didn't care where I had been. I had been out at a club...dancing away my scars and bruises, forgetting Jared completely. Jared wouldn't believe me though. It was either I was a cheater, or a liar.29

"I was out...a club" I couldnt form words. It was only now that I could smell beer on his breath.30

"Liar!" He fist connected with my face, and I felt blood run down from my lip. Another day, same crap.31

"Once more, Trinity. Where were you?" I shook my head. It was no use to talk.32

"Alright then...you cheated on me. What an...INSIGNIFICANT BITCH! I GIVE YOU MY LOVE, MY HOUSE, AND I WORK FOR YOU!! WHAT DO I GET? YOUR INFIDELITY!!!"33

He blew then, and I was caught in a flurry of fists. Before I knew it, I was on the ground. I made no attempt to get up. I made no attempt to scream. It was no use.34

I did scream though, when his boot landed on my stomache. I screamed for my child. 35

"Damnit Jared!" Tears escaped me. I knew now, that my child was dead, and Jared was responsible. My abuse lasted long into the night.36

* * * *37

I sat in the doctors office, waiting for my heart to be broken. I had to know if my child was really dead, I had to know if I had been wrong about Jared. 38

I wasn't.39

* * * *40

"WHAT???" Jared's yell shook me to the core. It was a yell of agony. He was on me in seconds.41

"YOU!" A blow to the face. "KILLED" Another. "MY" Another. "CHILD?!!" He sent a flurry of fists at my face, and I couldn't help but screaming now. My nose was broken...my heart was broken.42

I felt a blade at my throat, and felt it pierce my skin. 43

"This is for my child" He took the blade to his wrists, and cut; deep, and blood splattered onto my face. He punched me again and again, blood smearing on my face, my clothes. 44

The blade was at my neck, and I felt the blade sink it's evil fangs into my skin.45

Jared began punching me again, and I couldn't feel it. Blackness overwhelmed me, long before Jared was done.46