Becoming (Chapter Five)

5. Pain is Selfish?1

After I gave up pestering him with questions, I fell fast asleep, warm in Nylan’s, or rather, Adien’s arms. Whoever he was, it could wait till morning. Thankfully, my nightmare did not return, but I could not shake the feeling that it would be back to haunt me again.
When I woke up, the sun was burning into my eye sockets. Half-asleep, I squirmed and tried to rid myself of its brightness. Nylan shifted under me. Nylan!
Even though it gave my headache a boost, I jumped up and rubbed my eyes. When I completed this action and opened, my eyes, he was gone from the tree. Looking around in frustration, while stretching and yawning, I spotted him rolling up the blankets up ways away. Forget it, fine, but I sure won’t.
“I’m going. Stay here and get lost, or follow me,” he said in an unfriendly tone.
Grumpy much?
He started walking. I followed, for it was obvious the other option would eventually come to play.
During the day, the forest was almost more menacing. It felt like the corners of your vision were shrouded in darkness. It wasn’t natural, and it made me so uneasy, that I was tripping on Nylan’s heels. I kept pace with him easily, and was constantly looking behind me.
I could swear something was following me. The silence between me and Nylan was not helping. For the hundredth time, when I turned around, I saw something move. It wasn’t like I meant to, but I did scream.
“What the heck?” Yelled Nylan, turning around so fast his cloak whipped the trees around him with a slap.
My heart was beating so fast, and so loud, I could swear everyone within a mile could hear it. I must have looked like a pure bread blonde with my hand over my heart
“S-sorry, I didn’t mean to, but I thought I saw someone in between the tre—“
A knife at my throat cut me off. Nylan growled and pulled out his sword, a beautiful silver and gold design on the blade. The sharp knife tightened and cut into my skin so painfully. I dared not breathe, for fear of deep wounds.
The man holding me spoke. “All I want is her, not you. Why bother to save her life. She is worth nothing to you.”
Nylan studied the man behind me. “Tyran, you need to let her go. You know very well what I can do to hurt you. Do you need to risk it?”
The knife loosened, slightly. I felt a few deep breaths on my neck, and the chill sent me shivering tensely, so I did not hurt myself more. “She is no importance to you,” the man growled, impatience and worry bled through to my ears.
“You are wrong, Tyran, she is of great importance. Do you think I do not know? Ah, yes, I do know who she is. Now you will let her go, or I will kill you.” Nylan said it simply, with no distain, but you could hear the true threat in the words.
The knife released, and I heard running footsteps fading into the distance. I feel to my knees, shaking. Twice now I have faced death with a knife, and the memories and regrets brought more tears to my eyes.
Nylan knelt facing me, and his finger lifted my chin so I met his eyes. He stared at me a moment, and my heart raced with emotional turmoil. He’s so handsome. My thoughts whispered to me.
Suddenly, his expression hardened, and I lost all connection to him. “Jade, you will always be safe with me, okay? That’s a promise.”
Promises from the boys and men I knew were never kept. It was now my turn to harden. I clenched my jaw. “Never promise what you cannot keep.” I stood up and wiped away my tears, wishing I could march off, but I had no idea where to go.
Nylan, or Adien, the name still a mystery, got the hint right away. “We will go to the village. I will tell you about my journey on the way.” He walked off again, walking slower, and allowing room for me to walk beside him. I did so, anxious to hear his story.
For what seemed like infinity, the silence still hung in the air. My emotions still swirled from his gaze, and I attempted to push away any thoughts of him. But you have always loved him!
You don’t even know what love is, Jade.
Nylan began to speak, and my thoughts ceased, listening intently to him. “On my tenth birthday, flooded our house. Not by normal means, like an over-flowing bathtub, or sink, but I had discovered magic. My family, shocked and quite afraid, dumped me in the street. I was so terrified, and bewildered, I lost my mind to insanity. I almost jumped off a cliff. Before I could, the cliff disappeared, and I ran into a waterfall. I had found this world.”
He paused, and I wondered weather or not to say anything. Nylan continued though, “I was dehydrated and famished when I finally found the village, the one we are traveling to now. I had forgotten my name, and almost my life in the previous world. In time, it did return to me, but they gave me a new name, Nylan, and it’s been my name since. I discovered my gift, and for now, I’m the most powerful of our few remaining people, but many new discover our world each year. When I jumped worlds that night I rescued you from the cold, I did not do it myself. Fate decided that I be there for you, because my adoptive father was pulled along with me. You’re special Jade, because Keeper let you survive that night.”
Many, many questions were already forming.
“You can ask questions, I will answer when I can.”
I started with one, restraining myself from saying them in one combined sentence. “Who is Keeper?”
“He is the creator of all life, he knows all, he is everywhere, and he is the Good, and the One I worship. Destroyer is his adversary, and he tries to take what is not his, and does not respect our lives, or care for them.”
I rolled my eyes. “You mean that God and Satan crap?”
He stopped and when he turned to me, anger burned in his expression, causing me to falter, emotionally and physically, possibly even in my soul.
“Never disrespect someone who gave His life, His Son, to keep you from withering to dust, never existing again. Never,” he emphasized the last word, and tensed, trying not to cry at his biting tone. I bit my tongue, the pain from that distracting me.
He turned, and again our walk was silent. Before long, I could no longer stop the tears that left salty rivers down my cheeks. When did I stop guarding my emotions, and why does this… boy… seem to catch me off guard and make me so unstable?
I trailed behind Nylan, the questions still forming in my mind. What are the gifts he’s talking about? Why am I so special? What is his gift? What am I up against if I join their side? Is Keeper real? God let my mother die, how can I ever love someone who just lets someone so important die? How?
The ground appeared quickly, but I caught myself. My ankle throbbed from twisting it between the two roots. It was still stuck there, but I kept myself calm. I would not cry again, and I censored emotions to a pinpoint, a decision I knew I would soon regret.
Nylon gently pulled out my foot. When he didn’t heal it, but picked me up instead, I tensed, waiting for his anger to start up again. However, he only began walking quickly and smoothly, covering much more ground. Each step caused my ankle to fire pain through my nerves. I kept the emotions and thoughts pinpricked, and bit my lip to bleeding point. Warm, salty liquid oozed into my mouth.
“Pain doesn’t block out pain,” stated Nylon, breaking the silence, tensely.
I had already started the process of emotional emptiness, and I wasn’t going to allow myself to stop. I was sick of getting hurt, and I had the chance to stop it. “Whatever.”
Nylan dropped me. I screamed in shock and agony, but he yelled his words over it. “You stop it right now, Jade. Pain is a part of life, you can cry, it’s allowed.” I can’t breathe! I gasped for air, I needed it, my arms moved jerkily, I gasped and gasped. Nylan kept talking. No! I can’t breathe! I tried screaming for help. Nothing came but shallow, wheezing air. “I don’t want an emotionless girl to present to the village counselor, I need a strong, girl, like I know you are, Jade Reynolds.”
My vision was sprouting black spots. I’m going to die! Oh my gosh, I’m really going to die! I felt my body stop moving and my neck no longer supported my head. Time slowed, and so did my heart. It’s no longer rhythmic beat muted Nylan’s voice. In the distance I heard my name being called.
Mother?
“Jade!”
Mommy! I’m here, I’m coming, I’ll see you soon!
“Don’t you dare leave me, Jade, don’t you dare!”
Here I come...
Air suddenly filled my lungs, and I felt a strange sensation on my lips. My chest started hurting, but I couldn’t make a move to push the feeling away. The air came again. I opened my eyes.
Nylan jerked back, and quickly wiped his lips. I’m not contaminated! Hmmmmm… I wonder if that could be considered my fist kiss…
“Almost there,” he said briefly, before picking me up again.
No apology! I growled. “Put me down now, and leave there, or will,” he seemed too powerful to threaten, “jump off myself!”
Nylan chuckled. I hate you, I hate you, I so hate you. “You’re in no condition to be jumping.” You just don’t get it do you?
“You are the most inconsiderate guy I have ever met. I wouldn’t be surprised if every single girl in that village hates your freaking guts!” I was so angry; I had lost control of my foolish tongue.
Nylan tightened his grip on me. “For your information I have a fiancé, and every girl in the village tried to seek my hand in marriage. Now you bite your tongue, and keep your comments censored.”
I smirked, grateful to have an excuse to divert pain again. I bite my tongue, carefully focused on that pain, and my bruised back and ankle faded into the back of my mind. A knife would be so much more helpful right now.
The line of thick, dark trees stopped and opened up into a clearing. Nylan slowed considerably and I heard a girl cry out.
“Nylan! You’re…” the voice stopped and added distain. I knew the reason for it was me. “You’re back.”
Nylan set me on the ground, carelessly. “Yes, Celinie, we’re here,” and then he ran to hug the beautiful girl that already hated me. Not that I think any differently of you…