In The Backseat

I lay on the couch, and watched the TV flickering against the darkness. Yawning, I fought to stay awake to take in the last of the latest horror flick. It certainly didn’t appeal to me, the storyline was too cliché and the movie was horribly done and cheap looking. I was about to turn my back, retreat to the corners of the couch and sleep, probably sticking my nose in dust in the process. I couldn’t be bothered to turn the TV off, and the screams of the main characters echoed throughout the room. I was just about to close my eyes when the doorbell rang.1

“Now who could that be at this hour,” I muttered, glancing at the clock that resided atop the TV. I dragged myself from the couch, turned off the TV and flicked on the lights as I passed the switch on the wall. 2

Maybe it’s the vampire from the movie, I mused. It basically happened the same way in the horror flick as it was happening now.3

I pulled open the front door. It definitely wasn’t a vampire. It was just my boyfriend, Sean. I gave him a once over, and smiled approvingly. He was wearing jeans and a white t-shirt, a warm smile and was holding a small box.4

“I certainly didn’t expect you,” I said, reaching up to kiss him on his cheek. He returned the kiss on my lips and pulled me into an embrace. I held him for a couple of long seconds, before he let me go.5

“I got you something,” He put the box in my hand. I opened it and held my breath for a second as I saw it. It was the most beautifully crafted pendant- a silver stallion with gold mane, tail and eyes. It glittered in my dim but appraising porch lights. I set it down on the table by the door, and jumped at him. He staggered back a little as my arms wrapped around him, and he was hit by most of my weight.6

“I suppose you like it, then,” he said, running a hand through my hair.7

“Of course I do, it’s beautiful,”8

I led Sean to my living room, and we sat on the couch. 9

“What do you wanna do? Watch a movie or just talk?” I asked. He stared at me with his intense brown eyes.10

“I was hoping you’d like to go for a drive. Maybe we could go to the restaurant near the ocean.” I leaned forward and held him close. He was so thoughtful, and I simply couldn’t resist him. 11

Minutes later, after I had changed and brushed my hair, we got into Sean’s car. I leaned back into the seat and found his hand and held it. We had been together for a long time and still acted like a new couple. It was one of the things I loved about him.12

I had actually fallen asleep in the car when I was gently shaken awake.13

“Gabby, wake up,” Sean’s voice was soft, but exasperated. 14

“Yeah baby?” I said unsteadily, trying to mentally pull myself back to the now.15

“We have a problem.” I looked up at Sean, and I followed his gaze with my own eyes. There was a long line of traffic that simply wasn’t moving, and beyond that, the remains of a collapsed bridge. I swore under my breath. We couldn’t turn around, and we couldn’t go forward. We were stuck. 16

“How long do you think we have to wait?” I ventured, knowing Sean was possibly on a short fuse. I noted that he had already turned off the engine. 17

“Could be hours, unless they find some way to direct traffic.” He was still staring at the accident. The red and blue lights of the police and fire services lit the air with sharp streams of color every few seconds, playing on Sean’s smooth face. He reclined the seat, put his hands behind his head and closed his eyes. I did the same. We were in for a long wait. Minutes dragged slowly by. I looked across at my boyfriend, and my eyes lingered on his every feature. They swept from his curly hair to his forehead, down his nose and straight to his mouth. They lingered on his lips for a few seconds before I leaned over and put my head on his chest. His hands lifted from his lap and rested gently on my back and my head. Then he pulled at my body a little, beckoning me closer. I positioned myself on top of him and looked into his eyes. He held my gaze intently, and then his eyes clouded over with something else. Placing his hands on my upper body he pulled me down and kissed me deeply. 18

A rush of emotion surged through me as Sean’s hands massaged down the length of my back. I pressed myself against him, my thin but shapely figure fitting perfectly on his masculine contours. I ran my hands through his short hair as our breathing became rapid and needy. He slipped his hand up my shirt and caressed my smooth skin, going down to my lower back, and then back up. His fingers grasped my bra strap and then undid it, and my breasts fell heavily on his chest. He rose up, pulling me with him into a sitting position and drove passionate kisses onto my lips. My legs separated, letting his in between them, and settled at their sides. He placed his hands on my hips and pulled me into him, letting me feel his growing need for me. Moaning a little I put my hands under his shirt and explored his stomach, my fingers restlessly tracing his smooth body.19

“The people…” I started. Sean stopped my sentence with fresh, more passionate kisses.20

“What people” he breathed. He kissed the corners of my mouth, and left a tingling trail down my neck.21

“Out- outside,” I moaned a little. He pulled me into him again, and this time I pressed myself hard against him, making his lips part and bite my neck softly.22

“The tint-“ he didn’t say more as he started to suck my neck, his tongue stroking it gently. That was all the comfort I needed. Sean put his hand between us and gently massaged me. My breath hitched a little and he rubbed me harder, as I pushed myself on his fingers. He stopped briefly to run his hands up my leg and under my skirt. He peeled off my panties and in seconds had them tossed on the passenger’s seat.23

“Sean,” I said softly. 24

“Come on, baby,” he said, his voice thick with desire. We started to the back seat, and he lay on top of me. He didn’t undress me as quickly as I thought, or as I would have liked. Instead, he stared into my eyes and stroked my hair lovingly.25

“I love you,” he said, putting his lips to my neck again. 26

“I love you too,” Sean kissed my collarbone. He looked up at me and gave me a devilish little smile before continuing downward. He unbuttoned my shirt, slowly, knowing that with every second my want for him was building. His lips grazed my breast and I pushed it against his mouth. He removed the hand that was buried in my hair and cupped my breast as he worked the other with his tongue. My nipples hardened under his touch and he held it between his teeth and tickled me with his tongue. He did the same with the other, and then started slowly downwards again. 27

My eyes were closed, enjoying every moment, moaning softly in pleasure and frustration. I wished he would just hurry. I hardly felt him finish undressing himself and me. When he reached my hips, he stopped. I opened my eyes, my breath coming out in short, quick bursts, and wondered if he would go on. But he didn’t, he was having too much fun teasing me. He brought himself back up, positioning his body between my legs and kissed my face. I loved the way his weight pinned me to the seat, his bare skin against my thighs as I wrapped my legs around him and pulled him closer. He moaned a little. I could tell he wanted it just as badly as I did. I bit my lip.28

“What do you want?” he whispered.29

“You,” I said, pushing my waist on him. He closed his eyes and moaned.30

“What? I can’t hear you,” His erection was pressed against my hip and I ran my hands along his back, wanting to hold him and please him.31

“I want you now,” Apparently he was holding his breath because it rushed from his body as he slipped inside of me. I moaned loudly, my head no longer slightly raised but back against the seat. I waited, and so did he. Unable to take it any more I moved under him, moving my hips along his length. My hands were pressing against his bottom and lower back, pulling him deeper into me, then one settled on his back and my nails dug into him, like the flexing claws of a cat in a state of satisfaction. My waist and hips were thrown forward against him as I reached a climax, and then I settled, panting, watching.32

Sean was panting too, and he kissed me as my hips rose to meet his thrusts. I held onto him as I reached my second climax and he shuddered with completion inside of me. I felt like I was on a high, sent far up into space and then falling slowly back down to earth again.33

We lay still, holding on to each other, our breathing heavy. He laid his head on my chest, and for a few minutes, our hearts beat at the same rhythm. I stroked his hair, and rose slightly to catch a glimpse of what was going on outside, but the windows were clouded with steam. Sighing contentedly, I lay down again, but the car behind ours beeped, signaling that it was time for us to move.34

Author notes

Okay so the title isn't all that. I'm not a 'seasoned' writer of stuff like this so I hope it's good!

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have 0. (?) (Line numbers)
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Comments

1 - 15 of 15
  • =D

  • Mazzon
    October 15, 2008

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    On the whole, it's nicely told a scene. However, there were a couple of points that really stopped me.
    First, the time. The first paragraph left me thinking it was very late, most likely past midnight, yet there doesn't seem to be anything odd with her boyfriend just dropping by unannounced to bring an expensive-seeming gift and take her to a restaurant, not to even mention there's a traffic jam. So maybe it's not that late after all?
    Second, paragraph 23, where he 'peels off' her panties. If I read the story correctly, she's on top of him, legs spread to either side of his, with her weight probably on her knees. Now, if that's correct, then removing her panties without ripping them apart seems like a superhuman feat. Did I misunderstand something?

  • Damon Krosko
    October 7, 2008

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    Really hot, steamy, engrossing, I look forward for more from you later on. Thanks for contributing to the group!


  • Raeyle
    October 5, 2008

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    Again, another entry in this contest that I think suits what the judge is looking for. I could be wrong. Why I say i think it suits this contest is cause, you capture the moment and you let the reader into the tension and intimacy of the situation that is more than just the sex aspect. And the way you write it, leaves nothing to the imagination but leaves everything to it. If you understand what I mean by that. It gives one the general overview that directs how imagination may flow but still give the imagination that freedom to fill in the "blanks" as the individual may see fit.

    Keep writing is all I have to say.


  • Noisome.
    October 2, 2008
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    This was so well written and so flowing, but still incredibly hot. I love that it's able to be sensual, with lovely dovey elements, but you still delivered on the hot and steamy front. ;P I love that the windows steamed up at the end.. Great effect to a piece like this! Loved it. <3


  • Luckyk
    October 2, 2008
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    Not a seasoned writer...hmm doesn't seem that way. Great write


  • KitterBean
    September 30, 2008
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    Great job!

    Loved this!

    Finalist!

    Cat


  • IpodLove
    September 22, 2008
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    two words

    damn hottt


  • Nikki Rowles
    September 20, 2008

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    paragraph 27 ""I love you too," Sean kissed me collarbone." shouldn't be my collarbone...or is she irish?...other than that wish I think was must a typo...so...but I loved it...it was fabulous....an very unigue....and I must say that must have been some dark ass tent on that car....lol....but very good....the title is good, and if it wasn't a erotica contest it would make me wonder but with it being an erotica contest it's very apperent...but still good....
    Lauren

    beginning: 5, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 4, dialog: 4, characters: 4.

  • Faeinthewood
    September 19, 2008

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    I totally agree with Sgs! awesome plot for a story. i thought the title was great! the story flowed as if u were a seasoned writer of this. ontop of all this is was very sensual! thanks for entering! Good luck!


    • xxxWhisper-Sorrowxxx
      September 21, 2008
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      Thanks!! And I'm definitely NOT a seasoned writer I was just hoping it would come out okay. =D


  • Sgs
    September 19, 2008

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    I love this! The element of danger, coupled with some hot sensual lovemaking to pass the time. Great job and thanks for the entry!

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