Of War and Broken Toy Soldiers

Of War Zones and Broken Toy Soldiers 1

9-18-082

"The first casualty when war comes is truth." 3

When Al and Danielle were little, they used to play war. 4

Al was fourteen and Danielle was nine, and every single day after school, they would drop their bags in the kitchen and go play war Behind The Fence. 5

Because that's what they called it, "Behind The Fence". In truth it was a forest, but not in their minds. They would climb through the big hole that was there because some of the planks of wood had fallen or been ripped off, and then they followed the path that they had made all by themselves until they reached The War Zone. 6

When they played war, Danielle was always the one to get hurt, and Al was always the one to save her. They would make-believe that they were both soldiers in the Iraqi war on terror, and, being the faithful brother that he was, Al would always come and save Danielle each and every time she got hurt. 7

And she did. 8

In the beginning, she usually just got shot; but as the game went on, her wounds would become more elaborated and morbid. Legs blown off from a land mine, the inside of her head blown apart from a grenade, multiple breaks in both arms and missing fingers... Gashes in her stomach, bloody intestines. 9

Every time, Al would stumble across her. He'd frantically call for backup and make a mark in the dirt for the paramedics' helicopter to land, and then he'd save her. 10

"Help me, Al, I'm hurt," She'd say. "I'm hurt bad, I'm..." And then she'd go on to explain each specific wound as quickly as she could so that he could yell it into his walkie-talkie. 11

Then, he'd cover her up like a blanket, and save her. 12

Afterwards, expecting the helicopter to come and assuring her she'd be alright, he'd scurry back to the house. 13

But the helicopter had crashed along the way, and Al, unknowingly, had deserted her, leaving her to die; cold, empty, and broken, Behind The Fence. 14

After a few minutes of lying there, she'd get up and following Al back to the house, and they'd have dinner with their parents. 15

The game would not be talked of or played until after school the next day. 16

Danielle turned eleven and Al turned sixteen, and they still never neglected to play the game consistently, every single day after school. 17

But one day, Danielle got detention.18

Because she played the game after school with her brother every day, her homework was often neglected; and one of her teachers decided to put her into her place by making her stay after school. 19

School ended at two-thirty and detention ended at three-thirty, so she was home at four. Supper was already being cooked by her mother; spaghetti casserole, why did her mother cook so many casseroles? Al was sitting in the living-room watching TV. Not wanting to face him out of shame, Danielle sat at the kitchen table until the casserole was ready. 20

The family ate in silence as usual. Her brother sat across from her, his head low and his shoulders hunched, his brown hair flopping over his face. Just like normal. 21

When Al was finished, he said "I'm done," and left the table to go to his room as usual, his dirty plate and silverware still in his spot. For some reason Al never seemed to have believed in a fair division of labor among family members when it came to the dishes, or when it came to any cleaning for that matter. 22

That night as Danielle lie in bed, she worried herself sick. Would Al ever want to play with her ever again? She'd missed a day and she hadn't even been able to tell him beforehand. What a horrible sister she was. Eventually she broke down and began crying, squishing her face into her pillow and getting an uncomfortable itchy feeling around her eyes from the wet tears. 23

It didn't take too long for her to fall asleep. 24

...But when she awoke, Alan was already saving her. 25

At first she was thoroughly confused, had she somehow fallen asleep while she and Al were pretending to be in the Iraqi war, had it all been a dream, the detention, everything? But, no, she was still in her room, still on her bed. It had all happened. And yet, Al was saving her. 26

Was he making up for lost time? Then why hadn't he woken her up? 27

Danielle did a body check for wounds. 28

Moving her hand over her bare stomach and chest, she found it, yep- there it was: a huge gash going diagonally from her collarbone all the way down to her ribs, partially revealing her lungs and still beating heart. Realizing she couldn't move her left arm, she felt for it and found that it wasn't even there- blown off from a land mine, most likely. She also noticed that there wasn't much left for teeth in her mouth, either. Bits of broken teeth and blood but aside from that, not much besides bloody gums and gaping holes. 29

"Al, I'm hurt bad," she gurgled. 30

Nothing. 31

"Al," She said, a little louder this time. "I'm hurt bad." 32

Still, he didn't say anything. 33

Fear rose in Danielle's ripped-open chest. It didn't count as saving her if he didn't say his lines. 34

Why wasn't he saying his lines?35

"Al, alert base! We need paramedics!" She said frantically. "I'm dying! I'm bleeding to death! Al!" 36

He grunted, but not in response. 37

"Al!" Danielle repeated, beginning to wriggle around in panic. If he didn't save her soon, she was going to die! But he wasn't saving her, he was just moving over her and panting and how the Hell was she supposed to know if she was going to live through it or not if he didn't tell her it's okay, calm down, the paramedics are on their way?!38

An alien noise came out of her throat and she hit him on the chest with her clenched fist as hard as she could, but it barely moved him. So she hit him again, and again, and he tried to hold her down and keep her legs spread out but she just kept on fighting until they were just a big jumble of arms and legs and bodies like in the cartoons. 39

Danielle managed to flip over so that Al fell off the low-risen bed onto the floor, but he brought her down with him. Although he was pulling her arms and trying to hold her back she managed to get a hold on her doorknob, then she opened her door and flung him, pushed him, shoved him out the door, then closed it and locked it. 40

She didn't want to start crying but a few frightened whimpers escaped from her throat and a few tears leaked out of her eyes. Al didn't seem to be trying to get back in, but even so, Danielle pushed her dresser in front of the door to block it. 41

Shaking, Danielle did her best not to drop to her knees. What was he... why had... he hadn't been trying to save her at all. 42

Because the dresser had been moved, the full-length mirror behind it that had been put there because there was no room for it was revealed. Danielle hadn't even noticed it until she saw her image flash as she walked past it, on her way back to her bed. 43

She gasped and stopped dead in her tracks. She squeezed her eyes and shut them and then opened them, rubbed them, blinked, was what she was seeing in the mirror even real? 44

Her body was completely intact. No fatal gash across her chest, two arms. Opening her mouth, she could see a full set of pearly white teeth. 45

It's safe to say it scared her, but she was more confused than she was scared. Had she ever even been hurt in the first place? She had been so sure. 46

The wounds were gone, but the feeling of impending death remained. 47

Or was it just fear? 48

Danielle walked towards the mirror and picked it up gently, turning it around so that she didn't have to see herself anymore. 49

Neglecting to even look for the nightgown she'd fallen asleep in to put it on, Danielle picked up the heap of bed covers that'd fallen off of her mattress during the skirmish with Al and wrapped herself up in them, then curled up on the end of her bed. 50

She didn't have any windows in her room, so she just stared at the wall. 51

What had just happened, that was real, wasn't it? And everything behind the fence- that wasn't just a game, was it?52

At least, it wasn't now. Not anymore. 53

Before Danielle fell asleep that night for the second time, she thought about people who got saved and about the people who were doing the saving, and she thought that sometimes when they thought that that was what they were doing, how they weren't saving or being saved at all. 54

-End-