she didn't want to become her mother.

it's cold outside, and i have no where to go.1

my mom kicked me out for eating a peice of her candy.2

i'm fifteen, but i'll work it out. life will change. my mom will calm down. but, for now i'm going out to see chris. that kid is great. so smart. so nice. so caring.3

these were the things i thought to myself when i tured fifteen. as that night went on things got even worse.4

as i layed on his bed. i listen. his snore is sort of cute. but very damn obnoxious. i try to ignore it. but hen it get louder i start to get pissed off. i'm leaving before i freak out on him.5

Then i think...what in the name of hell will happen when i don't have my medication? if i freak out over a iittle snoring, things must get worse. what will happen when i can't get my pills from my mom? will i become as crazy as her?6

i hope not. i don't want to be anything like that crazy women.7

iv'e thought it through. i'll still go to school. iv'e had perfect attendence for so many years. i also don't want to mess up my 4.0 grade point average. so, i'll live with chris. he'll drive me to school. and pick me up. then i'll come back here. do homework and what not. and if my mom hasn't turned off my phone then i'll just wait for her to call.8

yeah, well thought out. nothing could go too wronge.9

i sat reading my book, with chris looking right at me. i ignore. when i look up he's still looking at me.10

"What the fuck are you staring at chris?!" i said angrily over nothing.11

"i.. i... i donnn't know. your.. face? eyes? boddy..?" Chris replied confused.12

"Well knock it off. you don't have jack shit too look at."13

"I just just looking at you. why are you freaking out?"14

"i don't know."15

my head went blank. nothing really could have heppend to me... 16

chris went out of the room.17

did i even just say that? did we even talk? did he hear me? or did i just have a complete conversation to myself?18

have you ever read a book and just not had any of the words process in your head? well, that's what happend. i finished my book about a meth head and didn't remember anything i just read. oh well happens to the best of us... dosn't it?19

well it's sunday. and i have school tomorrow. sleep tonight. early sleep.20

*~~~*~~~*~~~*21

can't sleep. i need my pills. thought's of horriable things are passing through my mind. i'm disgusted with myself. i'll go take some pills and try to sleep.22

*~~~*~~~*~~~*23

first period: art.24

second period: choir.25

thrid period: photoshop.26

fourth perio: math.27

fifth period: science28

sitth period: american history.29

seventh period: language arts.30

i love school. math homework. gross. but no worries. it will kill some time.31

school was good today. all my teachers come to me when they need me to help them with the class. what can i say? i'm a good student.32

when i got home me and chris played halo. gutiar hero and other such games. fun. time killer.33

i anticipated the time my mom will call me. my phone is still on. she should know i'm gone.34

*~~~*~~~*~~~*35

"ring, ring, ring."36

i answer the phone. sort of excited.37

"Hey mommy!" i sing with joy.38

"Where the fuck are you at nina?!" yells my mother killing my good mood.39

"i'm with chris!"40

"well you can't just run away!"41

"you told me to get out of your house!"42

"well if you wanna lie then you don't have to come home."43

the phone get's hung up. i slam it down. i'm pissed. my own mother dosn't even know that she kicked me out. for eating a damn peice of candy! i'll go home and figure it all out.44

*~~~*~~~*~~~*45

when i got home she was sitting on the couch. she has nothing to say to me, other than "decided to come home huh? could make it without me."46

i ignored everything that she said. "i love you mommy. i'm sorry. i'll see you later"47

i went up and took my pills.48

*~~~*~~~*~~~*49

it's been 15 years since then. i'm off my pills. i'm a laywer. i graduated harverd top of my class. i'm thrity and my mom's still crazy. the doctor say the pills did it to her. and if i wouldn't have stoped taking them the same thing would have heppend to me.50

life is good. me and chris are married. he's the most amazing boy ever. well alright man.