Sunday Skin

Elizabeth Daughtry loves her church. More specifically, she loves the front-and-center pew of her church, where she and her family sit, exclusively, for every sermon. 1

She also loves the dresses that her mother gives her for each Sunday- the red gingham is her favorite, because it matches her bow; the one that was momma’s before her and grandma’s before that.2

Elizabeth Daughtry, beautiful and sincere and nine years old, she loves church and dresses and bows. She is so easy to please. Little Elizabeth Daughtry, a good daughter and free soul, she does not know yet. She does not know.3

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Elizabeth Daughtry loves her little brother, Simon. He is tiny and three years old and has honey-brown hair that she loves to pet. Simon is so quiet and so perfect to her, she wants a child someday that’s just like him.5

Little Elizabeth Daughtry, she’s thirteen and plays games with Simon. She lets him tie a blindfold over her eyes and spin her around and around and then run away giggling. She must find him, stumbling about their large house, groping every surface, being absolutely quiet so he won’t hear her approach. 6

Poor Elizabeth, she bumbles down the hallway towards her parent’s bedroom, silent as a mouse. Her stocking feet pad against the hardwood floor, left hand thrust out in front of her, clenching and unclenching.7

That’s when she hears it.8

A moan. Just as quiet as she is, but more defined, closer. It‘s coming from the den. She reaches the door, a cool rush of air telling her that it’s open- but just a crack- and lifts the blindfold. Poor, stupid Elizabeth Daughtry. She lifts the blindfold.9

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Elizabeth Daughtry does not try to find Simon that day. She sits on the couch, she turns on the television, she tries to wipe her mind. But it will not work. The image of her mother and a man who was not her father play in her head like a slideshow, refusing to stop.11

Sad, lost little Elizabeth Daughtry. For the first time, she doesn’t know what to do.12

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The next day, the family car rolls up to Belmont Baptist and everybody shuffles out, rubbing sleep from their eyes. Mr. Daughtry holds Simon, while Elizabeth’s mother rustles around in the car for her purse. Elizabeth simply stands, wearing her favorite red gingham dress and matching bow, looking at the cramped white chapel. She loves church, she reminds herself, she loves sitting in the front pew.14

“Elizabeth!” Mrs. Daughtry snaps her out of her thoughts, smiling. “Are you ready to go in?”15

“Why don’t you guys go ahead?” She says absently “I have to use the bathroom.”16

“Alright, dear. Please don’t be long.”17

And they leave. Just like that.18

Elizabeth finds herself surprised that her family will leave her alone without a second thought. She’s surprised that nobody in the parking lot stops or looks at her suspiciously as they filter into the chapel, one by one, group by group, couple by couple. Before long, she finds herself alone, squinting up at the sun and wondering what to do.19

She almost wishes somebody had told her to stop gawking and go in. She almost wishes her father or mother or even Simon would come out looking for her, scolding her for being so long. Elizabeth, she wishes something would stop her.20

But it doesn't. And sweet, beautiful Elizabeth Daughtry; she walks away. She just walks away.