realization is painful.1
for her it came real slow 2
maybe she was wrong3
to play her little games4
after all that she has done5
no one can take her breath away6
empty, no emotion7
allowing people in8
but they never really see the truth9
beneath ever shallow skin10
her heart is forbidden 11
but she begs you tell him not12
she know how to break a heart 13
you never would've thought.14
the last to date 15
suddenly wanted 16
but a cold and empty shell17
no person left inside 18
oh what lonliness entails19
she does what she does 20
for it is all she knows21
she plays her heartless games 22
leaving people in the cold23
no one will ever know the truth24
about her shallow soul 25
nor will they ever understand26
her seeming heart of gold27
illusion she depends on28
in beauty she will trust29
until the day she's laid to rest30
and from suicide to dust 31
she feels no remorse 32
she feels no love 33
she only plays her games 34
until her lonely solmn death 35
her legacy remains
A contest entry
- My story deserves a trophy! by Melancholic Smile.
350 points, ended September 22, 35 entries
Honorable winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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This flowed so well and it was really quite moving, I noticed a couple of spelling errors which need fixing but it didn't detract from the flow of the poem. A good deep poem, I enjoyed this a lot, thanks for entering
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Really good!! I liked this a lot, it flowed so nicely, and was so well written, Good Job =DDDD!!! I noticed one small thing that could or couldn't be a mistake, I don't know, but,
in paragrapgh 13, 'she know(s?) how to break a heart'
Well, great job!! Keep it up!!
-Dani -
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oops yup that's a typo
thank you very much for the comment =]
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omj! that was really good. I didn't notice any typos which is really good,and it was fluently written.
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Thank you very much i really appreciate the comment
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