Confessions of sin: part 2

Gawyn looked at him doubtfully “What’s the bet?” he asked.1

“Very simple. You take your hand away from your cock and let me look at you anyway I want. Just look. If it arouses you, then you are mine to do with as I want. If it doesn’t arouse you, I’ll let you go with the promise never to tell anyone about any of this. There is one condition though. You will have to look at whatever I ask you to watch and I will take off my clothes.” He explained.2

Gawyn watched him uncertainly as he asked “You won’t touch me at all?” He sounded disturbed by that fact.3

“No. No touching until I see you are aroused by my staring at you.” He said with a gentle smile. Gawyn looked at him, the indecision clear in his blue eyes as he finally nodded with a deep breath. 4

Victor smiled as he got his way finally after what seemed like forever. He made a show of taking off his clothes and watched Gawyn bite his lips hard to contain his excitement. Victor looked at his beautiful cock then almost reverently. He had well hung balls and at least an eight inch shaft. 5

“Baby, you are so beautiful.” He told him and was rewarded with a flush on his cheeks that he couldn’t contain. As Victor looked at him and touched himself he ordered Gawyn to watch him. He looked almost pleadingly at him at that. But when he watched him, he gasped and as Victor watched he saw Gawyn’s cock fill rapidly as it started its upward descent. Victor did not touch him until his whole face was flushed with arousal and his cock started leaking pre cum. He kissed him deeply when he saw how agitated Gawyn was becoming as his arousal rose. 6

Gawyn hugged him as soon as he touched him, his breathing raspy and desperate. “Please” he said in his ear. Victor kissed his eyebrows softly and pushed him against the wall as he kissed his way down his hard well formed chest, nipping on his aroused nipples. He moaned at that throwing his head back.7

Victor knelt beside his vertical cock and licked the underside of his cock, guiding it gently to his mouth. Gawyn’s knees nearly buckled at that, as Victor asked him to widen his knees and brace his head as support. Gawyn watched as Victor’s head bobbed on his shaft, alternatively licking his sensitive head. It didn’t even take two minutes for him to come, as aroused and needy of release as he was. Gawyn licked him clean before standing up and kissing him passionately. 8

“I am not finished with you.” He growled against his mouth, grinding his engorged erection against his narrow hips. Gawyn smiled shyly as he said “Thanks.”9

Victor smiled at that. He liked a grateful lover. Gawyn asked kissing and nuzzling his neck, his actions still shy “Do you want me to go down on you too?”10

“No.” Victor said. “I want to make love to you.”11

Gawyn looked at him with wide eyes. Victor felt Gawyn getting aroused again with the mention of making love to him. “Will it hurt?” He asked his voice concerned as he circled Victor’s cock in his hands.12

“I will not hurt you any more than necessary. It hurts a bit the first time but it gets good.” He said looking into his eyes. 13

Gawyn looked at him trustingly and bent over, letting him have access to his hole. Victor ran a finger down the crack of his ass and muttered with a curse “Shit. I don’t have lube. It will hurt like hell if I go without it.” 14

“What about water?” Gawyn asked innocently.15

“No. It wouldn’t do for you. Don’t worry, I’ll just use my fingers this time to show you how good it can be.” He said as he slowly inserted one finger into his hole and curled it. He was very tight. He removed it slowly and Gawyn made a protesting sound in his throat. The second time, he pushed two fingers inside. Gawyn stilled, adjusting to the invasion. In time, as he rubbed against his sensitive prostate gland Gawyn started moaning and thrashing against him. “I need you. Harder. Please. I don’t care if it hurts. I want you.” He gasped.16

Victor took a moment to decide, before he slowly slided his aching cock into him. He made it faster for him rubbing the head of his penis over the sensitive spot all over until he arched his back and came hard with a muted scream. Victor turned him around and pulled him into his arms as he shook from the aftermath of their love making. They were kissing deeply when a loud booming voice interrupted them “Gawyn Radley and Victor Paten. What in devil’s name are you doing?”17

Both of them went completely still, their heart beats still beating in tandem. Victor felt the great leap of fear in Gawyn’s heart as it started beating harder. He protectively hugged him as he looked at half the school staff watching them with shock. Their chemistry teacher was crossing his chest as if he was facing the devil himself. Victor watched as Father Brendon’s ruddy face went still redder as they both hugged each other tightly. 18

“It’s the work of the devil himself. Stop this evil immediately.” He demanded.19

“So this is what you have been doing without attending the morning prayers. Separate yourselves right now.” Sister Nora said with disgust.20

Victor looked at the deeply embarrassed Gawyn and felt extremely protective of his nakedness. He pushed Gawyn behind him as he grabbed the towel and gave it to him. “Wear my clothes.” He said softly to Gawyn, trying to tell him with his eyes that everything would be okay. Gawyn wore Victor’s somewhat bigger clothes and Victor wrapped the towel around his torso. 21

“Follow me, both of you.” Father Brendon said angrily.22

Victor squeezed Gawyn’s hand and Gawyn looked at him with tears in his eyes. “I love you.” He whispered. Victor’s heart tugged at those words as he looked up at him sharply seeing the others have heard it as well. “I love you too.” He said solemnly.23

As soon as they were near the penance room, they were forcefully separated. It seemed that it was their chemistry teacher who had first seen them making love in the shower and he had gone and informed the others. Victor was taken underground into what appeared to be holding cells. The school was built in a medieval castle. So the design remained the same with the underground prisons. 24

“You will get no food or water for three days and perhaps if you pray hard enough, god would purify you of the filthy sin you have committed.” Father Ricardo, their history teacher was saying to Victor.25

“Where is Wyn? What are you doing to him you sick psychos? Loving is not a sin.” He screamed as they dragged him down the dank dark stairs to one of the small cells and locked him inside. 26

“He incited you to commit this cardinal sin. He should be punished to save his soul.” Father Ricardo said calmly.27

“No. You are mad.” Victor screamed in horror. It felt as if he felt the pain and horror of Gawyn. He did something he had never done before. He started crying “Please, don’t hurt him. It was me who incited him to make love with me.”28

“That wile act is not making love.” The man spat at him. “To purify his spirit he needs to be principled in corporal mortification. Once the penance is done, hopefully god would forgive him for inciting lust in men with his type of unnatural androgynous beauty. We thought he was our best student, an angel. How wrong we were.”29

“It’s not his fault.” He wailed but the man left him alone. 30

After what seemed like ages, he heard the big wooden gate to the underground open up. They opened the door next to him and threw Gawyn inside like a sack of potatoes, chaining him to an iron pole. When they left, Victor called Gawyn softly “Baby, talk to me.”31

He croaked first and Victor thought he was already dying. After a spasm of coughs Gawyn called him softly “Victor?”32

Victor cried as he moved as close as possible to the other cell and peered in. He felt crawling insects beneath him that he ignored. He heard the rattling and dragging of chains before Gawyn peered at him through the small openings caused by the metal casement like bars that allowed only a small finger to be put in through to the other cell. He fell down in exhaustion and he lightly touched the small spaces in the metal casing. Victor touched his finger tips. “Tell me love, what had they done to you?”33

He didn’t answer. Victor tried again tears streaming down his face “You are entitled to hate me. It was entirely my fault. I can’t live with myself if anything happened to you.”34

“Victor. Please don’t talk like this. I am very glad you forced me to accept the fact that I was gay. I was so confused and lost before today. When you made love to me, I felt like you freed a weary soul that had been imprisoned for too long. I felt like a bird set free from the cage. Don’t blame yourself.” He said the sentences with great difficulty. He said then with a long sigh “Even though I have known you for only a few days I know I love you Victor.”35

Victor’s heart cried out in anger and the unfairness of it. There wasn’t much they could do. They spend their times lightly touching their finger tips. The incessant noise of insects buzzing and crawling in their cells was droned out by Gawyn’s beautiful singing. As days passed Gawyn’s moans and cries grew. Victor would remember his cries forever as he begged for water. He had listened to his raspy breathing till the minute he looked into his eyes and whispered “I love you”. “I love you so much, my beautiful Wyn. Promise me that you would stay with me, that you would never give up on me.” Victor had replied back. “I promise” Gawyn had said solemnly before he started singing in a throaty dry voice his last song.36

“O Lord, hear my prayer
O Lord, hear my prayer
When I call answer me
O Lord, hear my prayer
O Lord, hear my prayer
Come and listen to me”37

He sighed softly in the end and Victor called out his name. Gawyn did not reply. As hungry, thirsty and cold as he was, Victor assumed Gawyn didn’t want to talk. Some time later that day, he heard someone walk down the stairs to their cells. The door to his cell opened. Victor was coiled in a fetal position trying his best to fight the chilling cold of the English Winter that seemed to seep through the skin into the bones from the ice cold floor. Looking up at Father Brendon he moaned “Wyn”. He struggled to his feet, falling alternatively as he went in to see his beloved, his bones feeling like the arthritic bones of an old man. 38

The grotesque sight and the repugnant smell of unclean pus and blood that greeted his nostrils made him almost faint straight away. But for the life of him, he couldn’t scream even though his mind was snapping. Victor looked at the ugly whip marks that now oozed pus and dark black blood from all over Gawyn’s body, especially the back that looked like it was ripped open by knives. He was completely naked with a heavy barbed wire that cut through his flesh on his right upper thigh. The selice was attached to a heavy chain that went around an iron pole. A huge lump formed in his throat as he looked at how Gawyn had stretched himself to touch his fingers from the other side. He looked at the blood oozing from the selice on his upper thigh, making a black puddle around him. Victor was crying in staccato gasps, his head spinning as he dropped on his knees beside Gawyn. He looked at the only part of Gawyn’s body that was unmarred. His beautiful face. He pressed his cheek again Gawyn’s freezing cold cheek and saw the dried trail of tears. Yet, his eyelashes were still spiky from the tears. Victor’s last thought before he fainted was that even with all the pain, Gawyn had never given up his faith in god. 39

Strangely it seemed god listened to him. Gavin died twelve hours before Father Brendon visited them to free them. In his death, except for the ugly gashes he looked very peaceful, as if he was sleeping and would open his eyes anytime. The school closed an year later on grounds of too harsh discipline rules and Father Brendon and Sister Norah were charged with the murder of orphan Gawyn Radley. The case was brought to court by Victor Paten and his parents. Victor Paten went on to become a successful scientist. He never married or had any relationships in his life. He devoted his life to helping orphans and making new medicine to give people life. People who knew Victor Paten claimed he was mad as he was seen at odd times talking and laughing with someone by the name of Wyn.