
Or why I have to scream?
But now I have some clarity
To show you what I mean!
I don't know how I got this way;
I'll never be alright!
So, I'm breaking the habit!
I'm breaking the habit!
I’m breaking the habit!
Tonight!
It was beginning to drizzle. The raindrops hit against the window pane and there was a distant rumbling... Thunder... The rumbling grew louder. His memory cells twitched. 'Fulminate' was one word he would often associate with himself; others being 'Poetic' and 'Mysterious'. That was the curse. For, the same deep eyes which could radiate endless care and warmth could also flush with temper; a temper so vehement that it would transform him into a Rage elemental. Paroxysmal!2
The rain pattered against the window and lightning flashed... His calm self was unperturbed by the sudden ruminations. He felt no emotion and the thoughts continued to flow. George Michael's "Careless Whisper" was in his ears.
The careless whispers of a good friend.
To the heart and mind,
Ignorance is kind.
There's no comfort in the truth;
Pain is all you'll find!3
I'm never gonna dance again!
Guilty feet have got no rhythm
Though it's easy to pretend,
I know you're not a fool.4
Should've known better than to cheat a friend,
And waste this chance that I've been given.
So I'm never gonna dance again,
The way I danced with you!
She had been the opposite which completed him. Her ebullient self would often force him out of his shell. His infectious enthusiasm brushed on her too. She was impressed by his forethought, his demeanour and most importantly, his impeccable straightforwardness. In a verbatim, she had once said, "You are straight as an arrow." He was one who could call a spade a spade without batting an eyelid. Never once did she think that those eyes she admired so much held a curse.6
"Hotel California" was nearing its end.
The pink champagne on ice.
And she said "We are all just prisoners here; of our own device."
And in the master’s chambers,
They gathered for the feast
The stab it with their steely knives,
But they just can’t kill the beast!
The rain did not seem to relent. The smell of soaked Earth pleased him immensely. He felt as if he was one with Nature. Mercurial... He had never hidden anything about himself; except for his deepest feelings, of course. There seemed to be a faint streak of sado-masochism in his personality. He was not one to give way to emotion; he had his own way of dealing with things. A touch of sadism because the Rage would [initially] not bother about the pain inflicted on her; and masochism because he dwelt in the pain she had caused him... Linkin Park was in his ears again. "Numb"...
Feeling so faithless lost under the surface.
Don't know what you're expecting of me,
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes!
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you!
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)8
I've become so numb I can't feel you there!
Become so tired so much more aware;
I'm becoming this.
All I want to do,
Is be more like me and be less like you!
He had no regrets. He had but one feeling... He had allowed his darker side to dominate when he could have been his usual, sensible self. But then again, he loathed hypocrisy. For all the 'big' words she had used on him, she had... He had always been himself. He had a nice and a nasty side to him; which he had not hidden from her. He lost someone whom he had sincerely adored. He knew it. 10
He continued looking out of the window. The weather was a welcome change. Zeus' lightningbolts still filled the evening sky. Each one vying for brilliance. Hephaestus must have had a hard time forging them. Michael Jackson's "Who is it?" got our man thinking again.
I am the dead,
I am the agony
Inside the dying head!11
This is injustice!
Woe unto Thee!
I'll pray this punishment
Would have mercy on me!
Perhaps, it was the best thing that could happen for both of them. They had grown to known each other very well, albeit for a season. They complemented one another and there was a lot they had learnt from being together. And finally, when it was time, they parted in the same manner that they had met. As two separate individuals in the walk called "Life". 13
The rain had by now reduced to a drizzle. Was it the calm after a storm...? Linkin Park was playing again... "What I've Done".
What you thought of me.
While I clean this slate,
With the hands of uncertainty.
So let mercy come,
And wash away
What I’ve done!14
I'll face myself,
To cross out what I’ve become!
Erase myself,
And let go of
What I’ve Done!15
For, what I’ve done
I start again,
And whatever pain may come,
Today this ends!
I’m forgiving what I’ve done!!!



Well, I wrote this as a premium (gold) user. It had pretty good formatting too. Sadly, I had to edit a part of it today to suit the needs of a contest. I ended up loosing all the formatting and the picture. Boo hoo hoo..
:'(


18 old applause
