Parents

who chooses them for us? Who has the power to give us to two people who probaly don't deserve us? God? what? because I have no clue.Its a question i've been struggling to answer my whole life.Mother.always in pain.forgets I exsist most of the time.Loves me dearly.But doesn't know who I am.1

Father.set on hearing my forgivness.Never was there.Never cared about anyting more then the meth.2

Don't feel bad for me.Don't mourn my life when you probaly have it worse.3

Step-dad. my own personal critic.Tells me what I shouldn't wear.How smart I should be.Sets expectations so high that I feel like i'm drowning.4

who chose this life for me?5

go to church Amanda.6

get saved Amanda.7

don't have sex Amanda.8

Do better in school Amanda.9

You can do better Amanda.10

He's not good enough for you Amanda.11

SHUT UP!12

I want to sew their mouths shut.13

I want to tell them "please,please just leave me alone".14

I want them to hold me and tell me their here for me.15

I want to be good enough.16

But in the end. No matter what I do. No matter what I say...Their never EVER going to see me.17

so to whoever did this.18

whoever gave me to them and said "make her what you want her to be".19

whoever let me drown like this.20

I only have one question for you.21

why?22