I am one step from the edge of the world,1
And it seems like my life has swirled.2
I cannot make the jump without help,3
So guide me with lethal hands and watch me yelp.4
Don't give up at the very last minute,5
You have to put your full heart in it.6
And forever you must love what I've become,7
And then at the end you can take me home.8
I'm not nothing, and never will be,9
That is only what you see.10
This is my one final word,11
The last one that I can have heard.12
Please listen and don't leave me,13
You've got to come and set me free.14
I am an angel forevermore,15
And that is what I am in heaven for.
In a list
A contest entry
- Deep Waters by InksterMoxy.
475 points, ended January 19, 37 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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The rhyming was pretty well done in this one, that is different for you, huh? Your stuff rarely rhymes, lol. I am a sucker for rhyming! hehe. This whole thing was very well written, keep up the good work.
And, to comment like a kiddo.
Dis was gr8, i lykd it a lot. gud job. yay.
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This is beatiful, Alex... I love the very first line, and the line, "guide me with lethal hands"... it flows wonderfully. Keep it up, doll. ^^
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Very nicely written...Great rhymes, and it flowed pretty well. It also did not seem forced like many poems where people try to rhyme...and I am glad that in this one you admitted you are not nothing...because you are something
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1000
holy shit that was wow. Like omg. And i only say omg when i like something that much. Wow. that was cool. Not cool doesn't describe it. I'm going to continue to tye until i think of a better word. that poem was off the chang. That's it. not a word but a phrase. ICed! Oh "chang" is Avogadro's number* to cool. that was incredible. Unfortunately I can throw the other one out the window. but ur a shoe in for the top. thnx for entering ( that sounds so geeky) Bravo
*6.02 x 10^23. Really bigbeginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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Thanks.
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sweet!!!!
very flowy,beautiful work,kawaii
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Great job. It's beautifully written along with sorrow in it. It flowed well. Keep up the good work.
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Good job! I don't usually like Poetry, but this was very good, nicely written and well described, good job! I really enjoyed this. Keep writing =DDD and once again, great job!
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That was a sorrowful yet beautiful poem! You have real talen and poems like these prove it. Wonderful job.
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Beautiful. You really have talent.
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*nods*
This is so beautifully sad!~ Good job. I like it. You are a real poet! You should make more poems. ^^ This one blew me away!
Why is it that Shinigami and Angels always catch my attention? DX! -
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Aww thanks ^^
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kawaii...
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thats so cute but sad
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