Piano keys

A lifeless city; burning bright into the sun
our steel hearts tied to a rope craving pressure
Hand-in-hand with my small cluster of fingers
We pretend to upgrade and agree.1

Well lets carry on our journey we were itching to succeed
with a hint of symbolic minutes and your favorite shade of gray
I favor your company with precious thoughts.
My heart pounding for a note.2

The excitement I apply to the music we make
I will always deny the miracles you have caused me.
Just let me be
as I stare at the world, colorless
I gaze deeply into the abstract sky, while the world beyond me listens.3


A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • ellie47
    January 16
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    I really like this


  • Iris Doyle
    August 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    duuuude. thats DANG AWESOME. i love it. i vote that you win. haha.


  • Famous by July.
    August 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I'll be honest, I'm not very talented with poetry. Reading, writing, understanding... But, I really thought this was beautiful. It flows to me, even with my failure at poetry. I just kind of felt a connection, I guess. I don't really know, I just thought it was lovely.


  • Vampirella
    August 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    AWESOME

    I LOVED IT!!!

  • sassykitty
    August 15, 2008

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    I love reading and writing poetry and this has the potential to be a very powerful piece. I liked the use of extended metaphor and imagery. My main crit would be the length of some lines, they seem too long and mar the flow and rhythm of this. Nice write, thanks for sharing.


  • StreetRider
    August 15, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Good use of words, and very unique. Good Job!


  • LilPoopyPoops
    August 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    ooooooooo fancy words. i love eet

1 - 7 of 7