A Meeting With the Past

It’s early morning but already light outside. On the other side of the blinds. It’s summer and it’s hot. Too hot. Even at this early hour. It’s not what could be called a nice day. Very humid as it is with great dark clouds threatening to move closer. Two figures are resting at a bed in the dim light behind the blinds. Neither are covered up completely and both are beyond caring about comparative nakedness.1

The bed is only just big enough for two adults and yet they’re not touching. The heat is too humid, they feel sticky. It has increased through the night. At one point the woman got up to open a window, she can’t sleep when it’s hot, but to no avail. It was worse outside. She went back to bed and continued lying on her back trying to fall asleep but failing. She wanted a shower to get rid of the stickiness but didn’t want to wake the man beside her. So close beside her. At last. 2

“You know what… I’ve been an idiot.”3

“Well, I know, so have I.”4

He turns to face her, still lying down, and raises a hand to brush a strand of hair away from her damp forehead. His touch is gentle and careful like he is afraid she might disappear under his touch. The fact that she doesn’t makes him smile. He speaks again.5

“Have you slept at all?”6

“No”7

Her gaze is still on the ceiling like it has been all night. She wants nothing more than to lay her head to rest on his chest and sleep, fulfilled. But she can’t, she’s too hot. Touching him would make her even hotter. Despite lying down she’s almost dizzy from the heat and lack of sleep. 8

“You can’t sleep because of the heat can you?”9

Can he read her mind?10

“How did you know?”11

“You told me once, remember, the time when you almost passed out in the summer. You told me an old… friend of yours used to call you a Viking.”12

She turns her head to look at him, surprised.13

“That’s, what, five years ago. I can’t believe you remembered that.”14

“I do, you said something like: “My ancestors crossed the Atlantic in open boats in the dead of winter I’m not made for high temperatures” And then you told me that you slept best in a cold room.”15

“That’s impressive.”16

“I remember quite a lot from that year. I used to go over the times we spent together over and over again to try and detect how you felt about me.”17

She turns her head again. Looking straight up she answers almost in a whisper.18

“I used to do the same. Never knew you cared.”19

“I always knew we were alike, you know, we became mates almost instantly. I just wish I knew just how much we were alike… back then.”20

He props himself up with a hand to get a better look at her. She’s still on her back. Her eyes are closed and one of her hands are resting on her stomach. He watch it move silently with her breathing. Her hand is tiny he thinks. He used to marvel at those hands, as small as a child’s and delicate and yet so strong. And able. He place his hand over hers, his fingers covering hers completely. He always wanted to do that, but never had the courage back then. On her face there’s a slight smile. She looks peaceful, beautiful in her stillness. Watching her he feels a rush of happiness, pride, love even?21

She senses that he’s looking at her. Looking at her in the way she’s been wanting him to look at her for years. She used to think that he was great. So great that there was no way that he wanted to be with a girl like her. She still thinks he’s great, fantastic even. And the fact that he is looking at her adoringly fills her with happiness, fulfilment, joy.22

An hour later she is making her way home. A few stops on the metro and a short walk. As she descents to the station the sky has gotten darker fast and the air feels heavy with tension. When she gets out again the downpour has started. She walks in the rain not bothering to hurry as she is soaked almost instantly and neither rain nor air are cold anyway. She rather like walking in the rain it’s almost soothing. It’s better than the hot heavy air that went before. The rain is not all welcome as she feels it washing away the scent of him. She feels cooler now, now all she need is to feel dry again, not sticky, not wet.23

She reaches her building and lets herself into her flat after leaving a trail all the way up the stairs, her being drippingly wet. 24

“Good morning sunshine!”25

“Sunshine? I look like a drowned rat.”26

“Not to me you don’t. Did you have a good time?”27

She walks to the window, absentmindedly looking out. But doesn’t answer his rhetoric question. 28

“Well I’m off. See you later.”29

“Don’t forget your racket.”30

She reminds him, almost by default.31

“I missed you tonight, love you.”32

He kisses her cheek and rush to get out of the door as he speak. She rests her head against the glass of the window and whisper:33

“You too... You too.”34