In The Beginning 1
A man sat in a chair, paintbrush in hand. He was painting a small, glass orb. The room in which he sat seemed to stretch far beyond imagining. Orbs were scattered as far as the eye can see.2
In The Middle3
All the orbs were painted. All the orbs were grouped, according to no apparent logic. The man sighed, leaning back in his chair, keeping watch over his creation. 4
In The End5
The man stood. He turned to a door that had not been there before, flipped a switch that had not been there before. Darkness fell.6
Author notes
need i entirpret the meaning? The contest i did this for is a hundred word contest, so i think i did good for making it exactly one hundred words
- For the Love of Writing group list • next in list
A contest entry
- Drabbles by tallblondie.
500 points, ended August 23, 35 entries
Honorable winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 30 of 30
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reflective
I love the idea of this piece. Limiting your words did nothing to hamper your creative side... I personally am a fan of people who can think of more ways than just the "Let there be light" beginning of the world.. and this IS reflective of some things in life. Do we always know what we create or do? Do we even like the things we make? And, of course, do we even understand those we've done?
Not always
I enjoyed reading this. I think you'd have done better than a green trophy though, but that's a personal opinion
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I think I've read this before??? hmmm, yeah, i think, I liked it then and I like it now, It's very good, very simple, I like that, good job =DD
-Dani
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Lol, interesting. It's a nice take on the universe, I suppose. Kinda curious to know more about what was painted on the other orbs and what all the doors and the rest of the rooms lead to. And where did the man go?!
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As I have told you before, you have a lot of talent
and I enjoy your work.
I can't comment on this because I have already done that.
Geri
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this is pretty interesting rubix.
good job and good luck. looks as though we're rivals at the present moment. friendly rivalry never harmed anyone. 
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This reminded me a lot of a certain picture by M.C. Escher (one of my favorite artists
). I like the imagery, and the surrealism, and the metaphors in this piece. In my experience, drabbles can come out two ways: as a short pithy story, often with a turn at the end that almost makes it into a joke, or as a short prose poem with a lot of depth and great language. I think yours falls fully into the second category, and does so wonderfully. The only think I question is the phrase "in the middle" - mostly because it's not something usually used in reference to time. I wonder if something like "In Between" might work better - but that is just a thought. Either way, I think this was excellently done. Good luck in the contest, too!
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This was a unique idea and one that I've never heard of. You worite it well and the shortness seemed to help. However you may want to work on the end part. It was good, just a bit too repetitive. Other than that, it was amazing! Good job.
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I do admire your writing ability.
Now this is a first—I’m lost
. I think 
I really didn’t get the symbolism—Maybe if he had a few more globes he might have been the ‘Creator’.
But you followed the rules and only wrote a hundred words. I can’t say good morning in that few.
I do admire your writing ability. I would love to see this interesting piece grow into something that I can understand.
Geri
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Im sorry but this is confusing.
It would be a good story i guess.
But in the story itself you would need much more detail.
And BTW, its not exactly 100 words.
Its 88. -
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srry, your ganna have to recount; its exactly 100
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haha.
sorry.
on the right it said 88 words.
but i just now counted it by myself
and youre right.
its 100.
haha. sorry for the misunderstanding. =]
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Very good
At first, it was very confusing for me. I din't really understand this type of genre. The Beginning had me reading a lot. The Middle made me blink as The Ending made me think. I didn't understand this. but I kept re-reading it, and I got it! w00t! Good job. -
Hey man, great story I love how you got this story going.
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I am impressed. I like the painting of the orb idea. I like the things that were there that weren't. A good description of the beginning of creation. I liked it very much
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Very nice. The symbolism is very beautiful, if limited. Perhaps after the contest has ended you can expand a bit on the middle and end. Very nice for a hundred words.
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just about everyone has told me i need to redo it with more detail... i think i will.
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This was rather baffling for it could only be a hundred words, thus you could not put much detail, but I do believe I got the gist of it. If I'm right, which is that I'm assuming this is either the path of life, the path of earth, or how solar systems exist then are destroyed, then this was portrayed rather nicely. The overall metaphor was well used.
However, it would have ben nice if you could have added detail. Sadly, I imagine that is difficult with a hundred word limit. It would have been interesting to see this expanded.
Good work. -
Nice job of 'painting' a larger picture on a small canvas.
Good use of metaphors and imagery.
It would be interesting to see 'the middle' expanded on after the contest but you got your point across in the hundred word limit.
Greg -
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after all the comments of people wanting me to expand this i think i will
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Think I get the metaphor and references here. Thought it was very well written and I liked the use of the man character. Appropriate choppy sentences in places, I liked the way you varied. Good luck in your contest, writing so briefly is very difficult and you pulled it off well. Cheers.
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Whoa! Deep. I think I get the sybolism. I don't want to ruin the guessing process for anyone else though, so yeah.
I really engoyed it no matter how short it was. It was well writen and well thought out. Good job!
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Well to be honest I don't get it. What's so important about the orbs? And where did the door that had never been there before lead too? And did the switch he flipped turn the lights out? I dunno a lot of unresolved questions in my mind. However, to be honest it was written well. Just didn't explain (at least to me) well.
. Rewarded 6
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Wow
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Very nice imagery. Sparse words let the reader fill in as they will, and my brain likes what it sees when inspired by your 100 word story. I get a Matrix vibe.
. Rewarded 4
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A good fit for the contest - has an almost profound mood to it. Good use of metaphors. Thank you for your entry and good luck.
. Rewarded 4
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oh, i just realized something. In the top-right corner it says 88 words, but if you count its really one-hundred. Im just making sure you know that.
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Yes, this could be expanded...I understand that it was a concept for a contest and intended to be 100 words, but think about how much more this could benefit from being a bit longer. You could add depth to emotion of the man in the chair...right now he is unfeeling and unthinking...giving him depth would add a lot to this story.
. Rewarded 6
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well, i left the story open to interpritation however the reader likes, but yes i may go back and add on mainly because of the man, mainly because of who he is... but if you dont know im not ganna say for the reason i stater earlier: i want people there to be a mystery about it and open to interpritation.
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It's good. You could make it about three or four hundred words, and use more detail, or metaphors. It kind of reminds me of something you could see in the end of Men ind Black.
. Rewarded 4
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the point of it is that its exactly one hundred words. Its for a contest. lol if it was men in black there would be aliens playing marbles with the earth
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