Nick's story (cont.)

At first I wasn't sure if he thought that it would just make it all go away or what he was thinking.  He apoligized later and promised me it wouldnt happen again, there was no reason to tell Nick.1

About 10:30, Nick got home from work with a large pizza, I ate a couple peices but left the rest for the boys to fight over.  It was amazing how quickly they became accustomed to me, also amazing was how much they respected me.  2

Both Nick and Jason worked, but I was rarely left alone in the apartment.  One night I was talking with Jason while Nick was at work,3

"I like it here, it's a nice place, I like the rain."4

"Some people do, some people don't."  He wasn't much of a talker.5

"I think I might want to live here, would Nick completely hate it if I looked for a job?"6

"Not sure, we don't really have a place for you to stay permanently, unless you want the couch.  But then we'd have to make you pay a third."7

"So it's okay with you?"8

"Yeah."9

Despite all that, I was still too nervous to talk to Nick about it.  I looked through the want-ads to see if they were offering jobs to run-away 16-year olds, McDonalds was hiring.  Not my dream job, but what's a girl to do?  My oldest sister, who is now married, worked at the McDonalds back home, the location was neighbors with a bar so she would often have to deal with drunks.  A man once slapped her across the face after threatening to kill one of her coworkers. This one was supposed to be in a good neighborhood.  Jason agreed that he would drive me me to my interveiw whenever it would be.  10

Three days.  It would be in three days.  that would be a Tuesday, the eighth day of being in Seattle.  I wondered how soon they called the police.  Probably as soon as they found the note.  They would worry, they would still be worried if I had left an itinerary in the note. 11

Sunday night I got my first tattoo, one of Nick's friends gave it to me.  It didn't hurt much, all the alcohol I had drunk numbed most of the pain.  It was a small, black star right above where my pelvic bone stuck out on the left side.  I had a bad hangover on Monday.12

You could say Nick and his friends weren't exactly the greatest people to hang out with, but once you get to know them, they are amazing people.  Once you look past their punk rock music, dyed hair in various not-natural colors, and the- as it would be- 'normal' punk clothes, they really are just like everyone else.  13

Jason wasn't "punk" though, he preferred not to label himself.  If you were labeling him, however, he would probably be put in a misfit catagory like that.  He was different than from the stereotypical outsider and never drank, did drugs, had sex, or even smoked.  I drank a little, but I'm pretty sure that one night was the only time I had ever really been drunk.  We would stay with each other when we went to parties since Nick was into all of that.  Nick always insisted that he was a romantic, but I didn't think that having sex with more than one drunk girl at a single party was very romantic.  Nick and I weren't "together," and were, as some of the kids would say, 'friends with benefits(I never understood the concept of this, there are no benefits to being romantic or emotionally-attached to a high school-aged boy, even less when he is drunk often and a drug addict).'  So he was free to have sex with whomever he pelased as long as I wasn't graced with details.14

Jason drove me to my interveiw on Tuesday.  He told me he had to do something but he'd be back when I was done.  He was waiting in the lobby when I came out, wiht a bouquet of roses.  He handed them to me and gave me a hug, he whispered in my ear.15

"I love you."  Shock.  I didn't say anything, I just smiled, Ididn't know what to say.  16

"The interveiw went well," I said after a bit of an awkward silence.17

"That's good," he answered back shyly, "I'm sorry."18

"Don't apoligize, all I ask is that you mean it if you say it." 19

"I think I do." He paused and then looked over at me, "you want to eat dinner with me?"20

"Sure."  Eating dinner wasn't bad, and Nick was having sex with who knows how many girls anyway.  21

He walked me out to his old Aires K, I, to this day, can't understand how it still ran after all that those years of use.  The car started after a few tries and we pulled out of the driveway.  He drove a few blocks and pulled into a donut shop parking lot. "Donuts?" He asked.22

"Sure." Not exactly my idea of dinner, but I had a suspiscion that he merely wanted an excuse to talk to me, and he probably didn't have too much money on him. 23

We sat across from each other in a booth with donut crumbs still on the table, Jason brushed them off with his sleeve.  Out of nowhere he started beaming as I ate my choclate donut with sprinkles.  "What?"  I asked, wondering if there was something on my face.24

"You're just beautiful, that's all."  My hair was dyed a fire engine-red about two months before, it was fading and my dark brunette roots were growing out.  I wasn't wearing make up (not that I did normally, I had never mastered the art of painting one's face.), I thought myself to be far from beautiful.  I would sometimes shower in the dark to keep from seeing myself.  I usually avoided mirrors.  Beautiful.  Sure, guys had told me that before, but it was something different this time, I knew he was being sincere not only with his words but with his intentions.  All he wanted to gain from saying that was me knowing that I was beautiful.25