Black and White Chapt 8

A couple hours passed and nothing seemed to happen. Crystel would take turns walking with each of them. Spending ten minutes with one, retreating to the middle, then ten minutes with the other, but the whole time, neither of them made a move to harm her. Isaac sat back and watched making sure of that. He didn’t know why he was waiting, he didn’t know why he didn’t just pull out his sword and attack her those moments she would spend with alone with him. But each time his hand would fall to his sword he would get an overwhelming feeling of uneasiness would cover him. He would think of what it would look like, he would wonder where he should hit, and whether or not he should let her take a good look at her murderer after he killed her, or it he should just run away as fast as his legs could carry him.1

Finally the time came and he knew that if he didn’t do it then, the goblin would get to her first and the last thing he wanted was a filthy goblin robbing him of this opportunity. So after Crystel approached him so confidently, with none of the hesitance she approached the goblin with he yanked out his sword, swung it around and prepared for the kill. 2

But instead if the feeling of metal hitting her flesh, there came a loud clang of another blade against his own. Isaac opened his eyes, only then realizing that they had been closed, only to see a sword pushing against his, being held by no one other then the huge green beast that had only a moment ago been behind them. Next to him, Crystel spun around upon hearing the blades crash together, yanking her own dagger out of a small sheath.3

Isaac saw her confused face and realized that she had not seen a thing of what happened, so on the spur of the moment he heard himself suddenly should, “Don’t you hurt a hair on her head!!!!”4

The goblin smiled bitterly, “You little slime,” He said with so much Iciness goose bumps began to spread across his arms. Jeff pressed harder on Isaac’s sword, making his own blade press against his chest. “I wouldn’t allow wind to blow a hair on her head were it up to me. I will never care what she believes and what she doesn’t believe; I will never let a sniveling snake like you hurt her.”5

Isaac looked at Crystel, who stood on guard obviously listening to every word, and trying to decode it. He couldn’t let this happen, he wouldn’t, “Crystel” he said trying to look strong hearted, “Crystel! Don’t listen to them, this is what they do! They know how to talk, If I were going to attack you I would have already.”6

Crystel’s face turned pale as she looked from one to the other. 7

“Go ahead,” Jeff said coldly “Keep lying. But in time, she’ll figure it out. People like you are easy to figure out”8

Isaac glared at Jeff, suddenly feeling fire begin to burn in the pit of his stomach, “your one to talk,” He answered heatedly.9

“You may think so. But I’m not that hag’s plaything. Not like you.”10

“Not like me, you say?” Isaac growled “your right, your nothing like me, I’m not a mindless killer! I don’t like watching people screaming in pain! I don’t beat people to a bloody pulp then leave them there for the wolves! And by the way goblin, I am also not the queen’s plaything.” Isaac pressed harder on his sword, managing to push it away from his chest, forgetting about Crystel, and forgetting about his job. All he knew were those cold eyes looking down at him, and the burning fury consuming him.11

“Don’t make me laugh,” Jeff said with a bitter chuckle, “your nothing but a pawn fighting for the life of your beloved queen, it’s not possible to take the likes of you seriously. Tell me, what is that you would lose if she were to die? Gold? Power? Maybe immortality? Either way, you’re a slime, just like all the other dogs who work for her.”12

Crystel stepped foreword, trembling slightly from the intensity.13

“That is not what I would ever want,” Isaac said trembling with fury, eyes glimmering pure yellow, “I would never want that.”14

Suddenly, Isaac put his sword down, pulling Jeff’s down along with it, “you say I’m hard to take seriously, then chuckle at this goblin. If Crystel were to kill the witch it would be the same as stabbing a knife through the heart of every goblin out there. I know this is true, she’s the first ruler to put you monsters into power, and for good reason. I’d just like to ask you, why do you think I, why do you think Crystel would be any different.” Deciding to leave it at that, Isaac stormed away to wait until the flames burning him up inside died. Crystel followed him, now keeping her distance from either one of them, And Jeff stood word drawn watching them leave him to himself, then bitterly shoving it back into his sheath he walked them, keeping a close eye on every movement made by Isaac.15

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *16

Crystel wished she had been paying attention before the swords had hit. Then, she might have noticed who pulled theirs out first, and then the problem would have been solved. No more fearing for her life, she could just run of with who ever saved her. All she knew now was that they hated each other more then ever and there was no way to know who was what. They both had seemed so sincere. She would have thought that maybe neither one worked for the witch if not for the fact that someone had obviously tried to attack her. 17

After that moment Crystal knew that her hand was not going to be able to leave her dagger just in case. 18

Many tension filled days and sleepless nights passed, and Crystel was relieved to know that her murderer seemed to distracted by hating her savior to worry about trying to hurt her again. Days passed silently, Crystel trying not to draw any attention to her self, until she noticed the trees beginning to grow larger and larger, bigger than she had seen them yet, until far above them leaves canopied blocking any sun and creating darkness around them. Isaac lit his lamp when it got to the point to where you couldn’t see an inch in front of you, only to reveal trunks so huge, until she could make out the rough bark Crystel mistook it for many small mountains. “Where are we,” Crystel asked breaking the week long silence.19

Isaac reached for the map in his back pack and studied it in the lantern light, after a few minutes he held it to a tree and traced it with his finger.20

“Well answer her question,” Jeff said irritably.21

“I don’t know,” He grumbled, “We turned here like we were supposed to.”22

“So where lost then,” Jeff sighed, “That’s just great, but I suppose It would be hard to expect anything different from you.”23

“Would you shut up you goblin, no one cares what you have to say. I wouldn’t be surprised f it was your karma that got us lost anyway.”24

“That’s typical,” Jeff growled, “trying to push the blame-“25

“You guys,” Crystel said quietly. Jeff stopped talking immediately, pleasing Crystel greatly, “I really don’t like you guys fighting like this. It seems like when anyone says anything someone is being attacked. I mean, I understand, under the circumstances that… y-you know.” Crystel hesitated, knowing she was practically killing herself, but she had gotten to the point where she was tired of living in fear and if it was going to happen it would happen either way, “you hate each other but, can who ever is going to kill he and who ever is going to protect me just do you thing now?” 26

Crystel watched the little she could see of them in the dim lantern light, bracing herself for attack, when suddenly she had a better idea. “No! Wait, don’t attack me.” She said, although neither had moved a muscle, “Give me your swords!” She stuck her hands out.27

“Why?” Isaac growled.28

“So then, I’m the only one with a weapon it’ll be safer that way, and so I don’t have to always be afraid and I will not have to walk by myself in the middle of your tension.”29

Isaac scowled, “Here,” He said, giving her his sword, Jeff handed his to her next, and then Crystel ran out into the woods, securing them under a giant root then covering it with some giant trees. When she came back Isaac scowled at the ground, “It’s probably sunset, lets get some sleep, and laid sulkily on the ground,
As Crystel took off her backpack, she realized why she suddenly felt more comfortable about the situation. It wasn't just because she took away their swords, there was, of course, many different ways you could kill someone. She realized that although there was someone present who was going to try to kill her, there was also someone there to protect her, and based off the ferocity of their argument, she now recognized who ever it was had his whole heart put into it.
So tired from lack of sleep, and finally feeling safe, she laid herself down, and this time it was both her and Isaac both who fell asleep before their head could sink into their pillows.

Author notes

I guess all I can say for this is what do think. Please please please tell me if any of the things in the argument seem stupid or random. The only person I read this to was my sister and neither of us are really the best burners in the world. lol.

I would also like you to tell me what you think of Crystel. if you look at the first comment she gave me some feed back, and although there were reasons I had her do what she did, it was not clear at all. I tried to fix it but If I missed somthing, pray, tell.

heeheehee this is the first heated argument I've given Jeff and Isaac. actually in all my other copies Jeff is this stupid love-sick wimp who never lifts a finger nor a harsh word towards anything. He's a goblin for gods sake!!! Also, just so you all know, I saac used to be ALOT slimier. I am glad to say that when ever I start feeling discouraged about this story, I can think about my previous copies and laugh at the huge improvement. It used to be sooooooooo stupid with anoying characters I couldn't stand and a much much less conveluted story plot. lol.

Just, what do you think? I guess.

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Valkyrie silver member
    July 26

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    It seems unlikely that days would go by without Isaac trying again to kill Crystel. Maybe she could ask to carry their swords herself for those days? Then at the end she can start hiding them during the night like she did. If Isaac's attacking her without provocation, it seems like he'd do it a lot if he had his sword.

    I like the tension you've got here. It's balanced, barely, and feels about to break at any moment. It's very good! I can see how this might be better than earlier versions. His extra sliminess might be noticed, and if it wasn't then Crystel would look like an idiot, but here, it's subtle, and her trying to be the smallest, least distraction she can is a good way to keep her from getting too involved.

    p1 uhh, how can she take a good look at her murderer if it's AFTER she's dead?

    I love the fact that the guys know the truth and Crystel doesn't. That's excellent!

    p23 where = we're

    • Yes... yet anher thing I ned to fix: Why Isaac doesn't ust op out and kill Crystel while he can.

      ^_^ I did not ever focus on Jeff's hatred for Isaac until this copy. The I realized: I can really ake this good if I trid. I'm happy you liked it. ^_^ thank you, again for commenting.

  • Krayline
    July 21, 2008

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    P4 - should should be shout
    P9 - your should be you're
    P11 - your right, your should be you're right, you're
    P13 - foreword should be forward
    P15 - word should be sword, as he walked them? should be as he walked toward them? or as he followed them? or as he watched them?
    P17 - run of should be run off
    P23 - where should be we're
    P24 - f should be if
    P26 - do you thing should be do your thing

    I think that it would be better if the first attempt on her life happened once everything got dark. It would be more plausible for her to completely not know who struck the first blow. If we had the argument first, while there was daylight, and then the attempt on her life second, after which she confiscated the swords, I think it would make more sense. You could put more antagonism between Isaac and Jeff much earlier, pretty much as soon as they come into contact (like Jeff holds out a hand to shake and Isaac spits on it or whatever) You could also characterize Crystel's relationship with Jeff as much better, like they can talk and learn about one another, whereas talking to Isaac is like pulling teeth


  • EphemeralStyle
    July 13, 2008

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    Oh nooo, she's going to get the wrong idea! O.o

    Lol, nice arguing Hmmm, Crystel.... I think she seems too innocent at times. Even though it says she's wary of both her companions, she acts like she really trusts them ^^"

    Lol! Well, I think Isaac could be more evil and stuff, but then, he hasn't killed her yet so he clearly has a soft side. As for Jeff, I'm glad you gave him a bit of spirit ^^ He's my favourite character Keep up the good work; perhaps a bit more background to this world now? Or maybe some more development with the little situation your characters have? Hmmm, dunno, but good luck and happy writing

    Eph


  • Girl Anachronism
    July 12, 2008

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    I liked it. There was sword fighting and arguing all in one. I'm still a little distracted but I'll try my best to be helpful. I'm glad that the characters are starting to get a little more...well character to them. We're fianlly getting to know them and a little more about them. I think it's be nice to have a little more background on the queen and her whole part in the story, though. It was a great chapter and I can't wait for the next one.


  • Melissa Loves Jeffy
    July 12, 2008

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    I think crystal could use a lil more work in this chapter. I mean I liked this a lot but anything with a human personality would be totally freaked after that happened. I think you should put her in some of the arguments. It just seems like Crystal to try to get to the bottom of things. Which brings me to, why did she go to sleep so fast? I mean she was nearly killed by someone she trusted and she has no idea who but someone betrayed her. I mean that would make me lie in bed thinking and scared. Weapons or no weapons. There are other ways to kill a person which is why I think she should be more scared. You know I love ya Genny but I just wanna help you out some! =)). Its late and thats the only time I can do my real thinking lol. But good luck. Also if you wanna just say whatever to me thats fine cause your way more of an experienced writer then I am!

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