A Lock [6]

CHAPTER VI1

Before that night, I'd only tasted bacon twice in my life. It was delicious stuff. Strawberries decorated the desert bread, and the wine was sharp and sweet. I'd been told that the miniature feast being celebrated in the banquet hall was a farewell to my party, and at one point I was welcomed in for a little while. The hall was chilly compared to the kitchen, but the mood was beautifully warm.2

Because we would find no time the next day, the Baron, Alexander, and the other two lords attended Saturday night mass at the abbey. I went to bed early with an aching head. Still, I was in a good mood because I was sleeping in a room I'd never slept in before. Strange things made me happy, it's true.3

I woke an hour after midnight, my headache gone. I had no desire to go back to sleep, so I sat huddled in my cloak. I could feel the thin weight in a corner of the heavy cloth, and put my hand around it, building up confidence. I hadn't played for years... 4

My eyes were getting used to the dark, and I started hearing noises from across the hall. I realized that no one else was asleep yet. I took out the pipe; it was slightly damp with condensation. I dried it on my skirt and put it to my mouth, trying to call up anything I remembered. 5

Alexander's voice drifted in from the dining room. My shoulders jerked, tensed, and I sighed. My mind fell into a revelry of imagination.6

I leaned there until my hand was like a hot breath on the pipe. I tapped my fingers on the steel, and my middle digit pulled at one of the holes. And I knew, finally, what to play. 7

Making music is the best thing in the world. It's the only medicine I have now, anyway. Sometimes when I play I remember a phrase: "This could heal somebody." I know my mother said it. She said it in the way a person might say "This could really hurt someone," but this time they weren't talking about hurting anyone. 8

I loved religion when I was little. I used to try and learn about the faith called Four. Their Io, the sun, and Ex, the moon captivated my mind. I used to have a necklace with Io on one side and Ex on the other. It's good to have charms for the good forces close to your body. I used to have a little marble, blue as medicine, which was supposed to symbolize Be. Be is like water. Like a little cave with candles reflected in water. It is rare and it is self-giving. It's what made up the music I played. I thought of all the healing it stood for as it steadied the notes.9

By the time I woke up next morning, everyone was packed up and ready to leave. Not exactly my dream situation. The horses weren't ready, not by a long shot, so I figured I'd have to skip breakfast and catch them up. I was right. I spent the entire last hour in the stable, just feeding, currying, and tacking up. I swore that day never to own a horse besides Exit. They're entirely too much work.10

We didn't stop by Romeo's grave when we passed it on our third day gone. (In reality, it should have been only our second day, but we were going slowly. I imagined Alexander's leg was still healing.) Alexander talked to his father in a strained voice that kept me from hearing the words. His expression was tight, wounded as he absorbed the thought of the rich-coated Romeo under the desolate moor. It was a real witch's haven - lone twisted tree and all.11

My pay had been docked at Philippa's because of my unforetold time off. I'd expected it, sort of. But business was really crashing in by the time we arrived, so there actually wasn't much of a difference. There was some new recipe - ale-soaked meat - that was really drawing people in. It was good stuff, beef if I remember right, served with optional ale-soaked bread. It wasn't hard to guess who had invented it: Logi, a foreign worker who was standing in the doorway ignoring me as I came back to work.12

Logi was pretty much the 'criminal of the bar'. Her name was pronounced 'Lohi', which was one of a thousand things I didn't understand about her. Besides the beer guzzling, her most recognizable features were short black hair - but it was really heavy and thick - and a wide face, with eyes like coals in a skull. She was angry, loud, but thin like like a walking skeleton. Short, too, and frighteningly muscular. She never smiled, but when she was pleased her eyes squinted daringly over her scowl. It sickened me that she was allowed in the tavern's kitchen at all. She was always drinking. She was fourteen, by the way.13

I sensed a sort of collective cold shoulder from the other girls for the next couple workdays. It made me a little scared to come to work, so I didn't hang around longer than I had to. It faded at some point. I wondered what I had missed. Probably some sort of rumor about why I wasn't there. Not everyone there knew my other occupation. Those in the dark were all of the kind that didn't care - but they could make up some pretty wild stuff. I didn't even want to know what they had assumed. 14

Ben started bringing a tiny goat kid around to the stable. The little guy started sleeping in a stall and living around the barn, and Ben pretty much forgot about him. But I watched it. I'd heard that goats carried demons sometimes. Four said that even when they were dangerous, they were animals to be learned from. I took this one pretty seriously, but I trusted him.15

There were foals to be broken that spring. Two of them had recieved some real low first lessons from Jowan, so they were unusually hard to deal with. One was a real rebel. The other was strong but scared, and paranoid about having his face touched. I knew I'd have to deal carefully with that one, be sure nothing further went wrong. The first would not be led a single step. The rebel was the offspring of Kenneth, a horse that Alexander III had been using a lot lately, and there were rigid expectations of him. In the long run, it was tough breaking him, because I didn't want him to be broken. 16

Castle news: The Honourable Alexander turned eighteen. His squire's training had become more grueling, and his father inquired of local provinces whether their harvest festival would include a chance for a squire to prove his merit. The lesser ceremonies were still uncommon, and he quickly grew frustrated. But he didn't give up.17

The Baron began to arrange hunts. He'd never shown an enjoyment of the sport before. Falconing was what he had preferred. I was, at first, asked to give my opinion of any dogs purchased, but soon a more experienced huntsman was employed for that purpose.18

A minstrel was finally hired. The jester had been the main source of entertainment at formal dinners until then. I assumed that the minstrel's arrival was connected to the extended visit of the Viscount of Dana. 19

When Charmaine arrived, she brought...a witch. Her third attendant was a true old-style Four cat...I think. (A cat is basically one of the female pillars of traditional Four and its darker side. The male priests are called hounds. A 'hood' is a pilgrim.) The lady's name was Idony. When she and Charmaine arrived, she touched the young goat's horns with her left hand. That was how I knew she was involved in Four.20

Friday, I skipped breakfast and rode to the stable early. The Baron had arranged to meet me the next day for an important decision: which of the foals to keep, and which to sell. I didn't trust the little one not to cause trouble, and the big red one was still jumpy. 21

The day before, the hard-nosed foal had taken a scared little leap in the right direction, literally, when on the lead rope. But he wouldn't move today. It was as if he'd been forced to lose a battle yesterday, but now was wiser. I knotted up a halter that made resistance painful for the colt. He hated it, but acted too stupid to understand, so it was no good. I gave it a rest.22

Mars, as I'd started calling the larger colt, should have been Kenneth's baby. He had the right color, the same attitude. It was easy to grow impatient at his fears, though. And for me, his cute dependance on human kindness just didn't compensate. 23

I found the dry meat I'd packed for lunce in my pocket. Frustration was giving me a headache, and I sat in pasture grass and ate. Ben walked out the barn door and started a pointless conversation. I wished to be back in my tavern room. And still, I had hours of work - here and at Philippa's. My eyes closed briefly.24

I woke up only minutes later, but Alexander's hands, it seemed, were still around my arms. I was starting to notice that I couldn't sleep without dreaming these days. I guessed it was because I was always tired.