Description: Painter

The brush is wide and coarse, and with it he stabs over and over again at the canvas. The smell of oil permeates this room, even with the windows allowing the breeze to waft through. He's adding what I can only describe as the color of orange sorbet, and the beginnings of a sunrise becomes apparent. The sound it makes is sort of like tapping a bongo drum with sandpaper, and it's sometimes rhythmic with the music keeping time from his playlist.1

I watch, enthralled by his technique, but more so by the way his body reacts to each movement. It's a critical squint of his light eyes, and the following furrow of blond brows that tells me he's focused. It's the tilt of his head as he pauses, hoping to see things from a fresh and new angle. It's the splatter-painted hand on his hip as he puts the brush down, and the blond hair he pushes out of his eyes as he steps back. And to think, he does this to relax.2

In this room, he looks like a rebel artist, energetic and slightly neurotic. The only thing living in here is atop his easel as he hums and moves like a parasitic creative host. As he notices my presence though, the neurosis subsides and he snaps back to being just mine. A genuine smile appears at his mouth and in his eyes; we share this creative contentment of life.3

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Naive.
    July 7

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    O.O  Oh, goodness.

    Paragraph 1: DAYUM. You're, like, the master of description and I should bow down to you or something. Seriously. Sight, smell, sound, and touch were all represented just in the first paragraph! Amazing job on that. Oh, and the 2nd sentence kinda rhymes. ^_^ Teehee.

    Paragraph 2: You captured the movements of an artist perfectly---the driven, energetic, almost maddeningly animated movements of an artist striving for a satisfying product...It's incredible.  I've never truly had an appreciation for painting, but now I feel like I do.  The way you have described his actions, I feel like I can relate to them to the way I write.

    Paragraph 3:  This concluding paragraph made me smile.  You wrote it beautifully...the lively artist and your enthrallment as you watch all come peacefully down to, as you said, a contentment of life, and also a satisfying, tranquil end to this piece.

    I adored it.  I cannot find one flaw.  O.O  I don't think I'm cut out for this editing thing.  xD.  All I have are compliments for this story.

    Oh, wait!  There was one part that I didn't quite get, although I don't think it's any fault of yours..."The only thing living in here is atop his easel as he hums and moves like a parasitic creative host."  <-- I didn't exactly comprehend what that sentence meant.  Could ya explain it to me?  =]

    -jj


  • heartfullofvenom
    July 6

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    I really loved the last paragraph. This sounds very,very,very good, and I like how you used a variety of words and sounds to describe the rhythems or the painter. This sounds like it could be part of a story or something. It is neatly written, and enjoyable.

    Good Luck!

    ♥


    • SimplyTaylor
      July 6
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      Pf, you're sweet. Thanks for the kind words and the creatively wonderful contest, I couldn't have done it without you.


  • the.preKKendile
    July 6

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    "...parasitic creative host." I like what you did with these words. It's like... he's feeding off the drive he gets form painting, and that's cool, because that's how art is supposed to work (I think). I also like the 'neurosis' bit. The mental wiring of creative people is -different from others, and even moreso when they're actually doing what they love to do. And there's that wonderful little zone that they get to when everything flows...
    I think that you've captured that well here, and the description is really nice to read~


    • SimplyTaylor
      July 6
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks, you! It's true, and I wanted to capture that quality of being a slave to your creative process. I could think of nothing better.

      You're the master of "that wonderful little zone." Can't wait to read what comes next.


  • No Comment
    July 5

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    Nice description since it is for a contest. Not much I can say in this comment but I hope you win something! Goodluck and keep writing. Until later,

    Soul

1 - 6 of 6