Slick and shining the organs lie in their jewelbox, precious articles awaiting the caress of the ripper's tongue. Smashing through their protective skin-and-bone shell, he had become thoroughly soaked in red wetness, its warm saltiness prickling his skin rapturously. When he catches a glimpse of glistening entrails at the bottom of the gash he has made, he pauses, admiring the first gleam of the treasures further effort will unearth.1
Suddenly, the phone rings on the desk near the dying man's head, bringing him out of his trance.2
The ripper reaches for it, but when his snow-pale hand touches it, the ringing stops. 3
Oh well. Must be a wrong number. 4
The rubbered hand retreats, returning to its original activity. 5
The knife remains embedded in the left side of the prey's chest, quivering. 6
The ripper is curious, because the knife isn't still. This means the man is still alive. Wondering if perhaps his eyes deceive, the ripper leans in for a closer look, and finds that they do not. The prey is, indeed, still breathing; hitching, gasping, choking out halting half-syllables, twitching weakly as if his brain still believes his body capable of struggling. 7
Acetyl had done much striping on the limbs, and carefully severed the important tendons early on before binding and treating the wounds. Strictly speaking, the prey shouldn't be conscious or able to move at all -- above and beyond the damage done, the ripper had forced at least 120mg of OxyContin down the man's throat at least two or three hours ago. He should be stoned insensible, if not unconscious. 8
(What must be done must be done, but there's no reason anyone should *suffer* for it. Besides, the screaming and wailing and begging is truly obnoxious, and often hurts the ripper's ears. He has very sensitive ears, you know.) 9
His tongue flicks serpentine through half-parted lips, drawing blood from the ripper's face, and he withdraws the six-inch butterfly knife from the prey's chest, almost unconsciously leaning forward in order to lap at the blood puddling up from the wound when the blade slides free. His mind had been full of thoughts of steaks, burgers, all the wonderful meaty things to be prepared later tonight, the raw sashimi he had been slicing off and consuming along the way as a snack -- but now he is intrigued by this mystery. The stab to the chest had been aimed quite perfectly; the blade should have pierced the aorta and caused immediate, intense bleeding and death. However, to all appearances, the injury caused the man no more detriment than a flesh wound. 10
Curious, the ripper drives the blade home into the left chest several more times, observing carefully the man's reaction to each piercing. The prey jerks, emitting a sharp, ragged squeal for each strike, but he does not die, and when the knife pulls back after the last stab, the prey's muscle tension vanishes as he collapses sobbing silently against the computer chair that had become the hunter's butchering table, but he is still breathing, still alive.11
What manner of witchery is this, the ripper wonders? How fascinating. 12
Unable to resist the call of discovery, the ripper wipes the butterfly knife's blade with a clean white cloth, then ties it into the cloth for later purification-disposal. From his belt, a new blade is drawn, glittering bright anticipation as it considers its task. His fingers lovingly caress the back-serrated, single-edged hunting/gardening knife with its red-and-black pyramid-studded hilt; its sleek singular blood grove; the uncompromised perfection of its sleek, arched cutting edge, hewn and honed to absolute razor smoothness. 13
He licks the blade, feeling its cold metallic presence coil about his own spirit-self in welcome, then returns his attention to his prey. 14
The big knife ka-thunks into the helpless man's flesh, expertly splitting the collarbones in the center before sliding down the prey's body, slitting his still mostly-undamaged skin in half. Deeper and deeper the ripper excavates, intent on discovering the answer to this mystery. 15
The jewels in their box are revealed in their full glory; first the abdominal cavity is rent open, the skin and muscle peeled carefully away. Then the big knife punches through the ribs, one after the next, before sawing through the sternum to lift it away in two neat pieces. The ripper proceeds with his task so carefully that at the end, the man lies with his hidden secret exposed, heart beating erratically but beating still even as the cold air washes against the pericardium, wrinkling it.16
The hunter is amazed. Someone has played an incredible trick on the prey. The guts are mirror-imaged, reversed, switched! Transposed viscera! What a trip! 17
The knife and the hunter are both extremely amused.18
He cannot stop chuckling to himself even as he leans forward. With great care, the hungry one rests his jaws around the dying, shuddering heart, lifting it free of its place ever-so-delicately without biting down, so that it remains connected to its vessels even as he begins to pull it free from the body.19
Acetyl shivers happily, feeling its final spasmodic desperations against his tongue, his gums, the roof of his mouth. 20
Then he crushes it against the roof of his mouth with his tongue as if eating an oversized pear tomato.21
A little moan escapes the killer's throat at the incredible rich rush of flavour and aroma; it explodes across his awareness like blue and crimson fireworks.22
That mystery explained, the ripper swallows his morsel and sighs, satisfied.23
For the moment.24
With that in mind, he begins to dress and butcher the prey's corpse, preparing the choicest remaining portions for transport. He wants burgers for dinner, and doesn't care for fast food ...
Suddenly, the phone rings on the desk near the dying man's head, bringing him out of his trance.2
The ripper reaches for it, but when his snow-pale hand touches it, the ringing stops. 3
Oh well. Must be a wrong number. 4
The rubbered hand retreats, returning to its original activity. 5
The knife remains embedded in the left side of the prey's chest, quivering. 6
The ripper is curious, because the knife isn't still. This means the man is still alive. Wondering if perhaps his eyes deceive, the ripper leans in for a closer look, and finds that they do not. The prey is, indeed, still breathing; hitching, gasping, choking out halting half-syllables, twitching weakly as if his brain still believes his body capable of struggling. 7
Acetyl had done much striping on the limbs, and carefully severed the important tendons early on before binding and treating the wounds. Strictly speaking, the prey shouldn't be conscious or able to move at all -- above and beyond the damage done, the ripper had forced at least 120mg of OxyContin down the man's throat at least two or three hours ago. He should be stoned insensible, if not unconscious. 8
(What must be done must be done, but there's no reason anyone should *suffer* for it. Besides, the screaming and wailing and begging is truly obnoxious, and often hurts the ripper's ears. He has very sensitive ears, you know.) 9
His tongue flicks serpentine through half-parted lips, drawing blood from the ripper's face, and he withdraws the six-inch butterfly knife from the prey's chest, almost unconsciously leaning forward in order to lap at the blood puddling up from the wound when the blade slides free. His mind had been full of thoughts of steaks, burgers, all the wonderful meaty things to be prepared later tonight, the raw sashimi he had been slicing off and consuming along the way as a snack -- but now he is intrigued by this mystery. The stab to the chest had been aimed quite perfectly; the blade should have pierced the aorta and caused immediate, intense bleeding and death. However, to all appearances, the injury caused the man no more detriment than a flesh wound. 10
Curious, the ripper drives the blade home into the left chest several more times, observing carefully the man's reaction to each piercing. The prey jerks, emitting a sharp, ragged squeal for each strike, but he does not die, and when the knife pulls back after the last stab, the prey's muscle tension vanishes as he collapses sobbing silently against the computer chair that had become the hunter's butchering table, but he is still breathing, still alive.11
What manner of witchery is this, the ripper wonders? How fascinating. 12
Unable to resist the call of discovery, the ripper wipes the butterfly knife's blade with a clean white cloth, then ties it into the cloth for later purification-disposal. From his belt, a new blade is drawn, glittering bright anticipation as it considers its task. His fingers lovingly caress the back-serrated, single-edged hunting/gardening knife with its red-and-black pyramid-studded hilt; its sleek singular blood grove; the uncompromised perfection of its sleek, arched cutting edge, hewn and honed to absolute razor smoothness. 13
He licks the blade, feeling its cold metallic presence coil about his own spirit-self in welcome, then returns his attention to his prey. 14
The big knife ka-thunks into the helpless man's flesh, expertly splitting the collarbones in the center before sliding down the prey's body, slitting his still mostly-undamaged skin in half. Deeper and deeper the ripper excavates, intent on discovering the answer to this mystery. 15
The jewels in their box are revealed in their full glory; first the abdominal cavity is rent open, the skin and muscle peeled carefully away. Then the big knife punches through the ribs, one after the next, before sawing through the sternum to lift it away in two neat pieces. The ripper proceeds with his task so carefully that at the end, the man lies with his hidden secret exposed, heart beating erratically but beating still even as the cold air washes against the pericardium, wrinkling it.16
The hunter is amazed. Someone has played an incredible trick on the prey. The guts are mirror-imaged, reversed, switched! Transposed viscera! What a trip! 17
The knife and the hunter are both extremely amused.18
He cannot stop chuckling to himself even as he leans forward. With great care, the hungry one rests his jaws around the dying, shuddering heart, lifting it free of its place ever-so-delicately without biting down, so that it remains connected to its vessels even as he begins to pull it free from the body.19
Acetyl shivers happily, feeling its final spasmodic desperations against his tongue, his gums, the roof of his mouth. 20
Then he crushes it against the roof of his mouth with his tongue as if eating an oversized pear tomato.21
A little moan escapes the killer's throat at the incredible rich rush of flavour and aroma; it explodes across his awareness like blue and crimson fireworks.22
That mystery explained, the ripper swallows his morsel and sighs, satisfied.23
For the moment.24
With that in mind, he begins to dress and butcher the prey's corpse, preparing the choicest remaining portions for transport. He wants burgers for dinner, and doesn't care for fast food ...
Author notes
I'm a terrible person.
(Mumford. Option one. Presume that the cutting becomes much more artistic and covers more of the body...)
In a list
A contest entry
- Why So Serious? by CactusJack.
350 points, ended July 7, 2008, 14 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - WANTED!!! Monsters, Demons, & Villains by Andy Stephenson.
350 points, ended July 1, 2008, 19 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Oh So Twisted... by Naive..
425 points, ended July 15, 2008, 49 entries
Honorable mention
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Bad, touchy, contest fun by Talisa Tourniquet.
247 points, ended September 8, 2008, 12 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Insanity, Please by Corpses.
310 points, ended August 14, 2008, 21 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Dark stories (now allowing PW) by Forgotten Anomaly.
600 points, ended August 26, 2008, 18 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Somewhat gorey but a bit lacking as far as plot in conserned. A lot of descriptions, wonderful descriptions. This is not however the first story of this sort that I have read on SW nor is it the best of its sort. I think if you added some plot to it and continued your descriptions throughout this would be a far more interesting story to read.
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No question it's definitely more of a scene than a story per se. I was expressing a mind-set, a situation, more than a story. There is some there, but it's a minor-key kind of thing. I'm probably going to assemble all these silly little things into a few longer stories.
Plot is something I struggle with. I tend to trust the characters to create plot through their interactions... but it doesn't work well with the serial killer ones, because they usually just do, well... this.
Thank you.
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What manner of witchery is this, the ripper wonders? How fascinating. 12 (This line is my one complaint. I really don't know anyone who talks- or thinks like this.. At least not in this century.)
Okay, anyway, this was fantastic. Your descriptions were incredible. I didn't know that Situs Inversus was a real medical condition until I read your one comment. Did you take anatomy? 'Cause the descriptions were, once again, incredible.
Very nice work, I LOVED it. ^-^


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... *I* talk/think that way sometimes. x.x; Yes, it's archaic, I know, but I like words. Sue me.
I didn't take anatomy formally, no. I'm just a sick, sick person.
And, like, thank you, too, also. durr. *self-directed eyeroll* -
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LOl talking like that isnt bad

Hah, and when I was little (this is somewhat off topic but you just reminded me of this) I used to have these anatomy coloring books.. They weren't actually for little kids, they were actually for like, scientists, doctors, etc... o.O
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OMG
very very good. thats all I can say

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O.O I actually liked this. It was extremely descriptive and there was immense attention to detail, which I loved. It appealed to me because you didn't hold back. The details were disgusting, but you included them anyway. For lack of a better expression, I think that takes balls. And I've never heard of situs inversus before, so this was really interesting. I also found the twisted mind of the killer to be interesting. Great job.
Good luck, but honestly, you don't need it. =]
-jj

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Wow, this story was amazing @.@
I love how descriptive you wrote, and how sick and twisted it was. I think I should read some of your other works... <3 Good luck in the contest, by the way!

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Good Story
This is very descriptive and detailed. The killer found himself with a victim whose heart is on the opposite side? That's got to be very unusual. It doesn't seem to present much of a problem to the killer. Your killer was simply shopping for fresh meat to take home and make burgers. How delightful!
Thanks for entering WANTED!!! Monsters, Demons, & Villains
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Andy

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Not just the heart -- all the organs. Situs inversus is a real genetic phenomenon. When I discovered this, it immediately inspired me in terrible ways... Thank you/you're welcome!
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1 - 10 of 10







