Too Late

I looked out the window of my apartment building. The floor threatening to fall out from under me and the walls creaking under my weight. A girl of no more than 15 approached the building. 'She's the one, she's Yaoi4life.' For months I had been talking to a girl from Australia on Facebook, Myspace, and AIM, and finally she was here, in NYC, the prefect place for a murder. Now, this was not some "lets kill a girl from Australia." No, it was much deeper than that. A year ago my father had worked for hers as a writer, he wrote about the company and her father raked in the publicity. For years my father did this, until he found incriminating evidence about the company. My father didn't believe it so he asked her father about. He said "No, this is fake, burn it." And that was it. The next day, my father was murdered, and who but her father would have killed him. We were then shipped off here, to NYC. We now have no money, no home, and no way out. And now, to get my revenge, he took my father, so I think it's only fair to return the favor. I heard the door downstairs creak open, then shut. "Hello?" she called from below. "Coming," I said in a sweet, high pitched tone. I walked down the steps, feeling my body temperature rise. As I faced her I felt myself on the edge of bursting, but controlled it, 'Just a little longer,' I thought. "What's wrong," she asked. I grabbed her neck and shoved her up against on of the few stable walls. "Your father killed my father! He was the only family I had! And now, I'm just returning the favor." I burst into flame, literally. I felt here scream, her skin sizzling and burning as the flames enveloped her. The smell of burned flesh and bone consumed me, then the building caught, just as I had planned. I felt my rage ebbing away as I began to revert from my fire-deamon self to my human form. I heard sirens approaching. I stumbled out, coughing as though the smoke effected me. Finally, my father was redeemed.

A contest entry

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Comments


  • EphemeralStyle
    October 10

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    Fire demon O.o Sounds like an interesting concept. You managed to get a really interesting story into a small amount of words. I think perhaps there could be a little more build-up, but I think it was fine, really. Great work!

    Eph

  • Well, I have one big peice of advice for you. Paragraphs are a wonderful invention, please use them.

    It was a little fast paced and there wasn't enough build up. You could have made this into a wonderfully complex story of hate and redemptions. Has potental though.

  • OMG that was the best death i have see yet welldone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thax for story