The Stupidly Late Insomnia Show- Ep 6

Davis: *jumps on the desk*
Welcome to the show everbody! I'm your temporary host, Davis. It's a great day for the Internet, everybody.
Why? because I'm here. Here. Center stage. Prepared to entertain the lot of you with my brilliance.
Of course, the censors are on my back and threatening castration, so, I will have to be a bit more restrained than general. That's right. It's my show tonight lovelies.
Fal is gone on the road and is .. Completely indisposed at the moment.
"But," you ask.. "But Davis. It's the Internet. Can't she do the show from anywhere?" Well. The answer is no and also.. Shut. Your. Faces.
Logic doesn't apply here at the Show.1

Like I said, it's a great day for the Internet. And people outside of it. 2

And guess whose birthday it is?
Joey Kramer.3

Yeah, I guess that did nothin' for ya.. He's the drummer for Aerosmith. Fal insisted that I mention it was his birthday on pain of castration. 4

It seems to be a common thread around here, doesn't it?
Fal refused to let me do any interviews, so the show will be rather short tonight, but hey. It's got me so.. .Stay tuned ladies and gentlemen...
*smiles*..
Especially gentlemen.
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Davis: Welcome back my lovelies. Fal has sent me an urgent correspondence and demanded that I deliver the news to her audience.. So.. Here's doin'...8

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The Shanghai Acrobats are impressive. However, anyone who considers attending the show might want to test drive LSD to see if they can handle a trip of that measure. With the rapidly flashing multicolored lights, the haunting music, and.. Oh yeah.. the small Chinese men and women in spandex multicolored outfits bending in unnatural ways and performing illusions. 12

Frankly, the entire thing was a hallucinogenic Wonderland-esque nightmare. Also its fun for the kiddies.
After that, we checked into our home away from home. Complete with kitchenware, whirpool tub, and completely suspicious comforter stains; All your hotel necessities. Hours of shopping later, day 1 is at a close, and I, your beloved host, plotting out the early morning journey with three different maps and a stack of brochures weighty enough to crush a large house cat.
Until next time, my frisky badgers. Until next time. 13

Your Beloved Host14

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Davis: Well. I am thoroughly jealous. A group of thin, muscular Asian men in tight-fitting sequined suits contorting themselves in mind bending ways under rave lights?
...That was MY dream, Fal. ...Mine.
Ah, anyway, it's time for'a Commercial. 17

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Davis: And we're back my.. toasted kitty-cats... Whatever. And do you know what that means?
Of course you do. It's Question Time.
Insert song I refuse to sing tonight here!21

Tiger-Lily asks "Why does pizza come in a square box?"
Well. That's a rather decent question. I'm not sure...Actually..Do you remember those games tots have that you put the blocks into the shape? Like, the square into the square hole and such ? 22

Well, obviously, Pizza Chefs come from those children that can't get the hang of that excerise.  23

Next question. Cam-Four-On asks "Whoosya Daddy..."
*Smiles*..24

Well Cam. Do you want to be my daddy? I'm fairly certain something could be arranged. Of course, there's no way I'm getting into a school girl uniform, not after last time. 25

The next question is from Fal.
Fal says "Did you honestly think you were going to do interviews tonight?"
Well Fal. No .. . No I didn't. Not after you posted it in triplicate on my dressing room door, locked and boarded up the green room, and posted a 'beware of leopard' sign on the folder of guest forms.
But.. That being said, it's time for commercials. 26

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Davis:. .Well.. We learned that32

•     Fal supports castration
• Missouri has an ironic name
• ...Cam wants to be my daddy
• Chinese acrobats are one man's fantasy and another mans acid trip
• Pizza chefs aren't good at basic geometry.