Teeth, and Magic Pt. 4

Tracking a werewolf is truly not that difficult. Basically, all you do is follow the trail of dead bodies. It may be gruesome but it gets the job done.
We waited until there was a full moon, when the werewolf was at his strongest, and set out on our journey. We easily found at least five dead people in the span of about ten minutes. We could tell that the werewolf was having fun because all the bodies had been strewn at odd angles all over the rooms we had found them in.
After a few hours of finding rooms all but destroyed by the werewolf, we came to the conclusion that he was trying not to be found by leaping all over the city in a non-linear pattern.
“Now, what?” I asked the white vampire. He turned his head to look at me.
“We wait for him to find us, and in the meantime, I'm going to borrow one of his dead bodies...” He answered, and picked up a dead body. He took it into a connecting room and feasted.
Since dead people were not my style, I found a nice house adjacent to the ravaged one we had been standing in. There was a sleeping man, probably in his late thirties who made a perfect snack for me.
Suddenly, I heard a scream coming from the room where the white vampire went. I abandoned my prey and ran towards the room. Kicking down the door for theatrical effect I spotted a young woman in the corner with the white vampire standing and staring at her from the middle of the room.
“Oh, great, now you've done it, whitey” a voice said.
“The werewolf,” we both muttered and looked behind us. The werewolf was there, sitting on the ground, cross-legged.
“'Ello, mates” He said. We both moved so that we were in a protective stance above the woman. I said, “It might be a good idea to drop the poor man's dead body,” and the white vampire looked at me, then at the body he was holding, and dropped it, his eyes widening.
“Ok, mates, so what do you want from me? You've been following me all night long...are you here to except my offer?” The werewolf said. The woman began to crawl out from under us. I reached my hand down and pushed her back. “It would be safest if you sat behind us, miss” I said.
“No,” said the white vampire, “Well, kind of.” I rubbed my eyes. This was bound not to work.
“Kind of? You joking, mate?” The werewolf said. He stood up and began to walk towards us. “I definitely hope you are...this is a yes or no question, mate, no kind of's aloud!” His body started to shift into the form of the werewolf. His nose protruded from his face and fangs began to grow, jutting out of his human gums. He leaned over and his clothes ripped off as his body began to grow exponentially. The lady behind us screamed and cowered. Fur was now beginning to grow and the deadly wolf was nearly complete.
“NOW!” Yelled the white vampire and he leaped onto the back of the werewolf.
I snapped my fingers for my dark minions and jumped as well. Quickly telling my minions to get the girl to safety I punched the werewolf's front right paw. He howled in pain and attacked with his claws. The pain was immense as the claws sunk into the flesh on my chest. I keeled over and coughed up blood. The white vampire was not doing too well either. He had already changed into his vampire form, which made me realize I hadn't. Just as I did, the werewolf charged at me again, his mouth bearing those horrible poison teeth.
As he swung a huge claw I sucked in my belly. My fist was the next thing to attack, and it collided with the werewolf's jaw. He was sent careening into a wall. I stood up and pointed at him. My black energy welled up and fired at the werewolf. I hit him where it hurts and now it was his turn to keel over. He changed back into human form and went into the fetal position.
The pain in my chest became unbearable and I fell over. The white vampire did the same, with a wound in the left arm. I changed back into human form and passed out.1

I awoke in a bed looking up at the ceiling. My wound had been bandaged by someone who had perfect form. I looked around at my sides and saw that both the white vampire and the werewolf were laying in beds adjacent to mine.
The building seemed to be a hospital, or something. The staff, who entered the room soon after I woke up, were elves. This explains the bandages I thought to myself.
I tried to sit up but my chest hurt so horribly I was forced to lay back down. One of the elves, seeing that I woken up walked over to me. “Please, don't try to get up. The gash in your chest was dreadful!” She said. She was very beautiful. In fact, no human I had ever seen was as beautiful as this elf. As she walked away, I could not help but stare.
The white vampire awoke about two minutes later and the werewolf woke up at about the same time. They inspected their surroundings in just the same way I did. “Oog,” the white vampire said.
The door to the room opened and revealed the council elf and the old man. They walked over to where we were all laying down. The werewolf stared at him as he walked to his bed.
“What do you want with me, mate?” The werewolf asked. I could see the werewolf's eyes glaring at the elf.
“All we want to know is where to mage is. Help us and you get to go,” the elf said. The werewolf sat up and said,
“All right, mate, but it ain't pretty. The only thing I can tell you is that he's standing in this room...” The werewolf said. All eyes turned to the one human in the room, the old man.
The old man looked calm. He raised his left and and muttered something and immediately his body shifted and morphed into a handsome young man. The elf looked like he was in shock.
“What the...” The elf said.
“Yes...” said the newly created young man, “I am the mage you were looking for all along. And now, I must say goodbye...”
The man raised both arms and yelled, “Ach Geegashna neeshna!” We were temporarily blinded by a flash of light. When we could see again, he was gone...

Author notes

part four of my storyline...yay
fun stuff and hey there's fighting in this one xD

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have 0. (?) (Line numbers)
    Ratings:

Comments

1 - 16 of 16

  • IxLovexElphiex
    July 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    pretty good.
    i would try varying your sentence lengths and starting words. more description and imagery would be great.
    and it is a bit confusing.
    unless it can stand on its own, i dont think that it is the best idea to enter and third or fourth part into a contest.
    but, i love any story with vampires, so you get brownies from me!

    thanks for entering and good luck!


  • jacobea
    June 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Good description in this bit Just one thing though --->

    “What the...” The elf said. HIs confusion comes across more clearly with a ? at the end of the ellipsis (...?)


  • Andy Stephenson gold member
    June 19, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Interesting

    Is your narrator a vampire? Werewolves are easy to track, just follow the dead bodies. Why were they tracking the werewolf? The elves got them all, but they were looking for a mage. Why were they looking for the mage?

    Thanks for entering WANTED!!! Monsters, Demons, & Villains

    Andy


  • Oddems.
    June 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    It seems good so far. Still you hve a bit of a problem about repeating yourself, instead of always starting a sentence with we, they, or I, try to think of some new words or new ways to phrase it. Oher than that it was a good part, and I'm off to see if there's more!

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


  • Web Haunting
    June 17, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Coolio, I like it!!
    *With Love* ~Wendy Elizabeth~


  • machie
    June 16, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    this is pretty good. Its kinda messy when it comes to the dialogue tho

  • Jinxgirl
    June 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    this is kind of hard to follow since you gave part four of your story rather than part one... I was also curious why none of your characters have names. interesting but sort of rushed.


    • MoraKpon
      June 16, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      i thought this part was the more fun one to read

  • akid100
    June 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Not bad, some issues with the combat scene but only one main problem. Why would they wait until the werewolf was most powerful before attacking him?


  • Reaver Greeters member
    June 13, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Still loving it..

1 - 16 of 16