Dear Nobody

Dear Nobody,1

It’s been four stupid months since Bella left me. Four frustrating, annoying, crappy months. That day she left keeps replaying and replaying in my head, like some broken record. It’s really getting on my nerves.2

She left me for a bloodsucker, a freaking vampire. Now that’s just ridiculous. She’s marrying him, for cripes sake!3

And the worst part is, now she’s probably technically dead. One of them. That bloodsucker killed her. Broke treaty. I have every right to march right over to his stupid, fancy house and rip him to shreds.4

The only thing stopping me is her. In the back of my mind, the very back (I would know, that’s where I put all the junky things I’m trying to suppress), I know Bella loves Edward. I know she does.5

And what annoys me is that in the back crevasses of the back of my mind, I know he loves her too.6

I mean, I tell myself she’s just a girl. There are plenty of others. But she’s Bella. She’s special. I love her for her. And I wouldn’t have had to kill her to be with her either. Put that in your pipe and smoke it, okay Edward? Stupid leech.7

Emily keeps feeding me awesome muffins and telling me I’ll imprint. She’s the only one that ever really talks to me anymore. Dad’s always at Leah’s, Leash is always bugging the crud out of me (she doesn’t count), the guys are all sick of me being pissed off all the time, so I go to Emily’s a lot.8

I know she’s trying to make me feel better, but I just can’t believe her. I can’t believe I’ll imprint until it actually happens. I mean, Sam and Jared have imprinted, but what about the ones who don’t? What happens to us?9

Whatever, this is stupid. I shouldn’t be writing this crap down. I should probably burn it so it doesn’t get into the wrong hands. I don’t know why I’m explaining this to a freaking piece of paper. I really am getting nutty.10

I’m going for a run.11

Jacob Black