Beautiful Bull.

The beauty of nature is dead. As I walk alone in the cold pasture I think to myself, "What would they do if they caught me here?" The Law would probably hang me which is just fine with me. But the one think I didn't want  is for some savage to find me first. Most of their kind have probably already migrated out of the cold to follow their buffalo, but you can't ever tell with those kind. 1

As I walk I spot cattle - wild. I follow them to a great pond, halfway frozen. In an astute display of courage and fear, they stand frozen as the pond and stare at me. As my eyes met theirs it hit me: they were hiding something from me. They knew something I wanted to know, but they would never tell. 2

I became outraged and vowed right then to kill a bull. Their bull. I would use nothing but a small knife I carried with me. I would track the bull and stab it behind the neck. In its last few breaths it would take its beautiful, hideous horns and gore me in the stomach. We would lie there together - dying. And as my sight faded I would kiss the bull on the head and die. The worms would come and eat me. Eventually, my pursuers would find me there with the bull. Some would cry and some would laugh. I could think of nothing better.3

So I began the search for this bull. I followed hoof prints in the ground, but only to find the same cows over and over. I thought of my love back home. I'd caught her with her mouth on some strange man. I shot him. And I left. I roamed the wilderness looking for death. I spotted a great black cow. Still no bull.4

I would not kill myself. I had promised this years ago to my lover. I intended to keep this promise out of mere spite for the many promises she'd broken to me. This is why my plan concerning the bull was perfect.5

I wandered on through the tall, dead grass. I heard a great moan of some animal and walked towards it. This great, black cow knew where the bull was - I was certain of that.6

It stood its ground as to challenge me. She had with her a small calf, and I knew the bull must be close.7

Thoughts of my lover came back to me. She was fond of always telling me I wasn't a man. This is also why my plan to kill the bull was so perfect. I would finally prove myself to her. She would realize all the horrible things she had done and either throw herself over a cliff or between the legs of another man. 8

I followed the cow to a hill and there, at the top, stood the bull - more glorious than I could have ever imagined. I took off my clothes and took out my knife. I began to run at him and he at me. And before I even got close, I heard a gunshot. I was suddenly on the ground and the bull was running away. I looked down at my stomach and looked all the way through. My head rolled over and I closed my eyes. I would die a jealous coward, naked and alone - out there in the cold. And I thought back to my lover, naked and hot between the legs of another man. If only I could have killed the bull - I could have shown them all.9