(Prolougue)1
In the hot jungle lived a baby giraffe named Twigs. One day he went for a walk in the jungle. He stopped when he heard Geroniom. It was a baby cheetah. 2
"My name is Geronium, fear me!" 3
"Nice try", Twigs said. 4
"Darn it, I still got to work on it! Do you want to play tag?" Twigs asked happily. 5
"Sure! My name is Twigs, and who may you be?" 6
"I'm Geroniom!"7
Well, the two boys were playing happily untill they suddenly heard someone call, "Mittens, it is time for dinner!" 8
" Mom, my name is Geroniom, not Mittens!" 9
"Okay my little Geroniom, time for dinner." 10
"Oh, all right, well I guess I'll see you later, I have to go in for supper!11
"Bye Mittens" Twigs said with a little giggle in his voice. "Tee hee hee, Mittens!" Hey! I heard that, Mittens said sullenly.12
While Mittens went home, Twigs started his way back home too. When he went inside he smelled something very yummy! He suddenly became hungry, and his mouth started to water.13
"Mother, I'm home!" Twigs said excitedly.14
"Oh, just in time for dinner!" His Mother said.15
"Mom, guess what, I made a new friend today! He is a cheetah!"16
"Oh my honey, stay away from him." 17
"No, Mom, he is my friend, and his name is Mitten's. Twigs said smuggly.18
"Okay, as long as he's your friend."19
Months went by, and the boys were as good as friends as can be! By this time, they were about three years old. Mittens has just asked Twigs if he wanted to go on an adventure with him. So that night, Twigs went home and asked his Mother.20
"Mom, Mittens asked me if I wanted to go with him on an adventure, and I thought it would be fun, would it be okay with you? He said we would be gone for a few years."21
"No way boy, your staying here! Twig's mother said.22
"But Mom..." 23
"No but's okay!"24
"Alright, but you need to meet Mittens parents."25
"Will do!" she said.26
27
Author notes
This is just the prolougue. I'm not done with the prologue yet though.
Please tell me what you think. What do I need to improve on? Will someone help me edit it please?
Comments
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It was a very good story, are you going to make a second one?
beginning: 3, language: 4, plot: 3, ending: 1, dialog: 5, characters: 3.
