Emo Boy

Once Upon a time there was a boy. His name was Johnny, but he preferred to be called "Bloody Tears Of Eternity," ... And he was emo. And on this sad and lonely night, he was dressed in tight womens pants and standing in the mirror admiring his rediculous emo haircut he had gotten the other day.1

"This will be sure to get people's attention," he said confidently to himself. Because emo people try to look retardedly homosexual to gain attention from anyone they can find, and he was sure he could accomplish that objective tomorrow at school.2

He took one last admiring look into the mirror before heading to bed...3

* * * * * 4

The next morning when little Johnny awoke, he was so excited. Today he could finally show everyone how completely unique he was by dressing just like all of his other friends. He was sure he'd get attention from all the chicks... and all the boys... maybe even a teacher or two.5

He quickly ate breakfast and headed outside to catch the bus. It wasn't long before the big yellow bus was seen rumbling up the road and screeched to a halt before him. As he got on the bus, his smile quickly faded when he realized no one else was looking at him. No one cared that he looked like an emo faggot. He sat down in an empty seat feeling sad and unappreciated.6

When he arrived at school, he hurried to find his friends so they could tell him how cool he was and obtain the self gratifaction emo people so deeply long for. But they weren't standing in their usual spot near the cafeteria. He couldn't find them anywhere, and little Johnny was on the verge of tears when at last... He found them outside. They were huddled around a half smoked cigarette. One of them picked up the cigarette and pretended to smoke it, trying desperatly to seem cool in front of his friends.7

As Johnny joined his equally insecure friends, a half eaten bagel fell from the sky and landed on poor Johnny's head. The first thing he realized was that his hair was completely covered in cream cheese, but then soon heard the laughter in the distance as some other group of posers rejoiced in making themselves feel better by picking on someone else.8

Johnny stood there... mortified... All he could do was turn and run... He ran straight into the girls bathroom and locked himself in a stall and began to weep. 9

"Nobody likes me," he cried. He used some toilet paper to blow his nose. "I'm so misunderstood and under appreciated," he sobbed.10

He pulled out the razor blade he kept with him at all times, because you just can't be emo without a razor blade in your pocket. He looked at it for a moment, contemplating on what to do. Then began sawing away at his wrist, and as the tears streamed down his face he began to feel light headed. Slowly he faded into unconsciousness and later died.11

~~~Disclaimer~~~12

And that is a tale of how unbelievably rediculous emo people are. I also realize that not every emo person out there fits this stereotypical discription, and this story was only written for laughs. I have nothing against emo's and their silly ways.