Staircase[1]

Why?..... 1

Why?..... 2

Why!?...  that word echoed throughout the tear-stricken brunette's head repeatedly as she tore herself from her father's arms. Those same exact pair of arms welcomed her and Rachel into a shared embrace just hours earlier.3

Who has the right to take her from me? She couldn't take another death... not again. 4

" I hate you! How could you just sit there and allow your daughter to die? And after what happened with Brian!" the brunette screamed knowingly tearing her parents hearts apart with each word. She watched as her mother completly broke down with guilt ridden tears streaming from her eyes on one of her purple plush chairs beside her bed.5

They need to feel the same hurt... 6

" There was nothing we could do! Your sister had an unknown heart condition. We were too late!" her mother said running to comfort her daughter with tears dripping from her face. At least she still had Taylor left.7

" Get off me! I need space." Taylor yelled trying not to hurt her mother as she pushed her off. Susan was taken aback by her daughter's sudden rage and hate twoards her.8

" I need space... " Taylor repeated to no one in paticular before bolting from her bedroom, down the hallway, and out the backdoor. 9

" Should we go after her? Taylor will most likely go into the Manor hunting grounds. It's getting dark out. " Frank asked his still emotional wife.10

" No... let her have her space. She won't go past the Manor ground limits." 11

Barefoot, Taylor ran swiftly into the forest unknowingly leaving her old life behind with every stride she took. Tears strained her already less than perfect vision as she allowed them to keep falling from her honey brown irises. The small wooden pole went unoticed as it silently marked the boundries of the Hayden Manor hunting grounds. Taylor was now inside of Cloud Forest.12

The sounds of Taylor Hayden's feet pounding against the auburn leaves scattered against the damp forest floor took a back seat as she thought about her sister. She couldn't take anymore dead syblings...13

* Flashback* 14

There were the sputtering sounds of a stalled engine, a violent crash,and then a loud groan that awakened a pair of twin sisters from their light doze outside in a poorly constructed tent.15

"Brian! Brian is that you?" A young girl called after waking first to see what all the noise was about. 16

 17

" He probably snuck out to meet his new girlfriend..." her sister said turning over to go back to sleep.18

" Dad is gonna have a fit if he finds out that he snuck out after curfew again." the younger twin said grabbing her flashlight.19

 20

Another groan, muffled but a groan still, echoed throught the small backyard. 21

" Brian's hurt! He must be. Move Rachel!" The younger of the two said shoving her twin sister with enough force to completly wake her up. Rachel scrambled to her feet after her sister's words completly sunk in. She clicked on her flashlight as well, before following her sister out of the tent.22


" Brian! Help me Taylor! Pull his helmet off." Rachel screamed after seeing her older brother sprawled across the ground motionless.23

 24

Taylor stood there horrified at what she saw after unsnapping the cracked helmet. Blood was everywhere. There was a deep gash on the side of his head and some of his skin had even been ripped from his scalp. 25

" Oh My God! Check his pulse Rachel!" Taylor yelled after dropping the bloody helmet near the slowly growing puddle. Rachel quickly grabbed Brian's wrist and counted. 26

" There is a pulse... it is very faint from the emense blood loss." Rachel said with tears in her eyes. 27

" Brian! Wake up! Rachel, go get Mom and Dad!" Taylor said frantically while taking off her jacket to apply some pressure to his head in an attempt to stop the blood flow. Rachel quickly ran in the direction of the Hayden Manor to wake her parents. 28

" Tay..lor..." whispered a soft voice. Taylor looked into a pair of sapphire eyes that were beginning to glaze over. 29

" Brian! Everything is gonna be okay. Rachel will be back with mom and dad soon. Just stay with me okay?" Taylor said trying to reassure her brother and herself at the same time. The blood continued to flow from his head and now completly soaked Taylor's jacket. 30

" I......love-" Brian started. 31

" No! You can't give up! I love you too much for you to die on me!" Taylor said desperately grasping his hand. A few of her tears fell on his leather jacket before he spoke again. 32

" I....love...you....guys...Taylor...." Brian said as his eyes started to close. 33

" Please... don't die. I need you here! Don't leave me here alone!" 34

"Please...." Taylor begged as his hand stopped grasping her's. 35

**** 36

More tears ran down her rosy cheeks as her mind visited the one memory that she wished could be erased completely. Just as with Rachel, she couldn't help Brian...37

These thoughts fueled Taylor's legs giving her a second wind. She sprinted deeper and deeper into the forest. Within thirty minutes, she had gone a distance of five miles.38

Her feet finally started to feel the pain of her weight being shifted so frequently, that she collapsed on the ground once she came to a clearing. The clearing was filled with millions of exotic flowers that dominated the air with their scents. Most of the flowers were in harmony with the emerald lilly pads on the delicate pond to the left of the clearing. Frogs began to croak with the setting sun while resting on the lilly pads.39

" Is this a sort of garden?" Taylor asked hours later still panting a little from her run. 40

I've gone way past the manor grounds... Taylor thought realizing how fast she must have been running.41

Taylor made her way over to the pond in order to rinse off her sweaty and tear stained face. As the water wiped away all the physical evidence of her pain, Taylor actually took a look around her. Then she saw it. To the right of the pond.42

A staircase ... 43

The staircase was worn,even chipped in some places, giving the impression that someone, or something for that matter, had traveled it many times before her. Either that or it was simply old. There were no rails or other things to grab onto in case you lost your footing. Taylor silently questioned its saftey rating. The staircase seemed to go straight up into the sky. Taylor gave her face another splash of the pond water to make sure that she wasn't seeing things. 44

How could a staircase lead up into the clouds? Taylor asked herself logically. 45

Then,the white vines lacing the staircase gracefully winded thier way over the surface of the pond making a bridge from the stairs to exactly where Taylor was kneeling in the water. 46

I wonder where it leads... 47

Author notes

this is a work in progress... it will be much better. i just had to get something in writting.

In a list

give me suggestions on to where you want me to go with this.

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • moonwriter
    June 24

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    Too many elipses (...). They're fine when used in moderation, but they were used too often. They're used for pauses or when you're drawing something out. Example: I hope she comes soon...

    This needs emotion and detail. It was straight dialoug. There was no character insight or emotion. There was nothing to make me feel for the characters. I was loosing interest and fast. I didn't really get the story. It all seemed rushed and a little all over the place. And a little cliche.

    Add emotion. Give me some feeling! Tell me why they were sad. Emphasize relationships and focus on feelings! Give this something to really make it stand out.

    This was pretty good, but it needs work


  • Tiger-Lily gold member
    June 22

    Edit | Reply
    Very good story. I like how you went back to the past.

    You may want to proofread this, though. Quite a few typos, etc.

    Goo work. I want to see where this goes!

    -HT

  • This is a very nicely written story, it's organized very well. Keep up the awesome work!


  • LadyScorpio
    June 20
    Edit | Reply

    Nice

    I loved it. Agree with the comment second below the one after me. You should change the font to white.....I kind of struggled to see, but I made it. Haha...this was very well done. Hope to see more from ya.

    Keep writing. Keep pushing.

    -LadyScorpio


  • Sousuke
    June 16

    Edit | Reply
    Just a few corrections before I comment: Throughout the story you spelled this word as forrest. I dunno if that was on purpose but it only has one r. Also in paragraph 34 you spelled finally wrong. Par. 36: I've gone; not went. Anyways, I like the concept! At first I thought it was choice 3, but then in the end it turned into choice 1 lol. I'd like to read the rest and also to learn more about her other sibling. Thanks for entering and good luck!

  • Okay... a little hard to read because of the font color.. lol.. but from what I picked out I loved it!! This piece was well written, and though it kind of just dropped at the end, it was still good!

    AWESOME!!

1 - 6 of 6