Interlife Chapter 1: It Begins

This particular chapter was pasted from a text document due to me not knowing about this site, so something might turn out wrong, this perhaps might be it.1

This site does seem cool though and I might get lots of readers (Unlike fictionpress)2

On with the first chapter:3

The internet now, in 20010, today, as we know it, was not like two years pryer to this year, 2008. In 08, people always had these things called a "Personal Computer" that they would leave at home in they're specialized computer room and play on the internet virtually. Now, in 2010, this is no longer possible. A hacker spanning over 50 years of programming knowledge has hacked into the real internet, and the following message flashed across the television screens internationally at approximately 12:01 PM on January 1ST, 2010:4

"The internet, as you knew it, is, and will remained PWNED. Enjoy!5

This, of course, got the media fired up such as CNN. CNN said "Please, everyone, make sure you use appropriate Anti-Virus measures to ensure your security on the internet. We do not know what "PWNED" means, but the US government, FBI and computer technitions are currently investigating. Thank you."6

His name is Jack Starfield, and he is currently inside his suburban home, the electricity completely powered down, as he focused on his radio sitting nearbye on the nightstand. He took it with a swift grip, and whent to the couch. The radio was battery powered with two Double-A's that slide into the back compartment. Additionally, the battery compartment had no cover. "That's just how the government rolls in 2010", he thought as he pushed the rocker switch up and positioned it to "On". "Or whoever the hell makes these things, these cheap ass radios", he thought again as a smooth jazz FM station started playing with bits of static.7

As he moved the dial, he noticed that, in all the times he used this bloody radio, the dial moved, and the numbers kept changing on the radio's fragile display screen, but the station would not change.8

Suddenly, as if by magic, a message came up on the screen saying the following:9

"Stop." "I have control of your radio, I am now the centralized government. I've got 7 other members of my team who have control of each respective continent." "See, Jack, with that radio you've got there, it won't do you much good in 2010. This is why you need to go digital."10

Jack immediately picked up the radio and threw it straight up into the air. "No you fucking don't, you fucking assfuck! Stop what you're doing, you'll just pay for it later! Or at least I fucking hope you do!"11

It did a few twists and turns, before smashing through the window situated to the left on the wall near the coffee table. "Damn, that thing's got some bloody velocity on it for a radio to bust through it as if it were a bullet. Mind me, it did come from Radio Shack, which sells Shitty radios anyways. Hope it breaks down there", Jack blurted aloud.12

"You still can't stop me, hehehe. I have some telepathy skills, too. Sorry for bugging you." "Just talk, and I'll hear you. Or, just think."13

"Well, what am I to do here?" "Now that you have control of me?" Jack asked to thin air as he sat comfortably on his living room love seat, waiting for an answer of the PWNer. Or, maybe it wasn't the PWNer? He didn't know at this point. What the flying fuck does PWN mean anyways? He'll soon find out...14

"Simply go to your computer and boot it up." "I'll take care that you get killed, the police won't see your body, and overall, a case won't be filed for you."15

"What?" "You're gonna kill me? Jack asked, expression and fright in his squeekie voice"16

"Technically, yeah." "Now hurry and get to the computer room before you're destroyed, this apartment in with which you live will be fried in 30 minutes, I'll need to get you online and digital by that time."17

"What time is it now?" "And, what's the date?" Jack asked. "I forgot."18

"It's currently 10:00 AM on January Second. Happy now? Hurry!"19

Considering the fact that Jack had just moved to this apartment, it bothered him that some jackass with telepathy skills was Fucking around with him. He used to be a former gangsta, but now it seems as though what this dickhead guy is saying to him, he's about to become a geeksta. He made a mental note of this in his head without thinking it, as the "Dickhead" would hear. And since Jack did not know this character who was screwing with him, he thought, again without actually thinking, that "DickHead" is a great name, let alone nickname. For this dick anyway.20

As Jack sat in his ultra-customized computer chair, the seat back automatically pushed itself back in limits it couldn't handle, but surprisingly stayed in good condition while he sat back. The seat almost felt like a plain taking off at the position it was positioned.21

While he sat, a big, huge, parachute like object surrounded the chair and him, and a feminine voice could be heard, saying, "It's okay, sweetheart, I'm your digital mother." "You should arrive in the next hour or two. Teedi, proceed with takeoff sequence of internet rocket..."22

"Will do, Jannet Starfield."23

He cringed at the thought of Teedis voice. That was the "Dickhead" guy. And, now that he thought about it, did the government PWN the internet to build a whole foundation for the internet, and we're it's beta testers? Another thought suddenly popped into Jack's mind as he had just ended thinking about his previous thought. "Does PWN mean destroy, or destroyed?"24

This rocket, surprisingly taxi's like regular plains did in 08. After a terrorist attack on most of the US's airports, this is what the US made? "Rather interesting," Jack thought as he waited for the probably unbeatable air pressures of takeoff.25

And it came. Faster than a plain, faster than a flight to mars on a ride called MissionSpace that Jack recalls going to in 06. This was all too dramatic. It is actually impossible to describe. "Damn it, I wonder how blind people would feel getting on these things, not being able to see and all", Jack thought as the rocket began to slow for a course that Jack hoped was a place of paradise, and best of all, no stress.26

A mini version of a television appeared in front of Jack, and it immediately started talking.27

"This video will teach you the necessary steps to be safe on this rockinental flight. We thank you for flying with us. Please take the time to read the Rockinental emergency handbook, which wil be in your lap in just a few seconds."28

A container shortly appeared whiched looked as just about the same as a coffee can appeared, aimed it's target censor at Jacks lap. It looked like a gun, but what fired from it was just a pamphlet. Exactly what the Rockinental TV had said, the Rockinental emergency handbook.29

Shortly after this, a camera appeared, it's lens focusing in on Jack, and shortly after that...30

"Come on, lazy." "Read the Rockinental emergency handbook! "It's for your own goddamn fucking safety!" the TV blared. "Or, since your destination is the internet, Rockinental rocklines would like to say, "RTFM!"".31

Without hesitation, Jack read the Rockinental Emergency handbook from beginning to end immediately without any other order. Then, after he scanned the last word, a hologram of a woman appeared, took it from Jack's wondrous hand, and said, "Thank you, flight will now proceed. Remember those instructions, because we won't tell you again, we got other shit to worry about. Oh yeah, and BTW, all radios on the internet and everything else, including this rocket, are uncencered. You don't have a "man" for your president." "Rather, what you have is a dell computer running the program that makes president decisions." "Of course the people get the vote, but only once. After this, it will remember the IP/Domain of the user, and not let you vote for president. This is true for any political voting on the net".32

And she was gone.33

"All flight attendance, please be seated for departure. And hurry the fuck up, I don't have all day, I know how women are sometimes."34

Jack mingled with the other passengers after the rocket was fully off the ground. Since Rockinental, before they fuly get off the ground they hover and give you the respected Rockline EHB. It's not like regular airlines where they used to let you read it if you want, the internet is tuff in 2010, and everybody is unfortunately going to have to live with it. Jack looked around at his new neighbors on the plain with him, and began a conversation.35

"Hi guys, my name is Jack. What's up?"36

"Nothing much, my name is Earl." The guy next to Jack's left said with a smile. Earl looked to be in his thirty's with long, blond hair that, to Jack, almost looked as if he never went to a barbershop before, but that's Jack for you. His eyes and other items on Earl's body really don't concirn Jack, so he doesn't look at, or into, his eyes, to avoid giving the impression that he was gay. Or anywhere else for that matter.37

"High, my name is Carlen. Nice to meat you, Jack." Carlin was Earl's hunny, and Jack thought she was perhaps the most beautiful woman on the rocket right now. "That's the only thing I can think of, really." "Can't describe her."38

"So where you guys going?" Jack asked.39

"Uh, the internet" Earl said. "Same place as you."40

"Now do you guys know if this whole PWN thing was made up?" Or was it another media lie because the media are like that sometimes when they wanna be."41

"Yeah, it was another media lie. Basically, the internet as we know it has been destroyed, and websites, etc, no longer exist". Earl said.42

"and this goes for email too?"43

"Yep," Carlin said. "I don't know how the hell we're gonna be able to get mail around in there, but who the hell knows".44

Earl yawned. "Well, the newspapers, who know's if they're true or not, said that apparently there's a new postal service called the RPS.45

"RPS? What an unoriginal name to the UPS" Carlin said.46

"Yeah, what is it, rocket postal service I'm guessing?" jack asked.47

"You got it!" Earl exclaimed. "What they're also doing online for us though is making hover vehicles for us to travel. People like Ford and BMW are actually making leaps and bounds to make these things hover in the air. And you know what? My grandsun is blind, and now he could drive online!" "Bleh, that's if he was alive, but that's for another story entirely." "Jactac is blind, so he could beta test these vehicles perhaps.There probably wouldn't be such things as crashing, as you're in the air, so what could you hit?"48

"Sorry to hear that", jack said. "So basically what online is becoming is our real life? And yeah, I would love to beta test them too. Who's this Jactac dickhead? I don't know, but I just love the word dickhead for some reason. It teaches people not to fuck with me."49

"Yeah, that's what I heard," Carlin said. "Apparently, there's no such thing as an ISP anymore, it's just one huge ass network, and the internet slogan is, "Go digital." Actually, there are several different ones, like "Start your digital life today", and others. It's random with each earth television and radio advertisement. But, it appears as though the US is now being controled by computers so if a savilion buys one they'll be thrown on the rockets too and brought here. Pretty soon at the rate of people buying computers there really won't be anyone on the fuckin' US. Who knows after this if Europe will start implementing AI everything like the US did yesterday? And Jack and Jactac, I'd worry about just figuring out what Shit we're falling into before you say you wanna test electronics. Especially vehicles!"50

"Does the internet have a millitary?" "Probably AI?" Jack asked.51

"Yeah, Earl said. "accept it's not millitary, it's the Illitary.52

"Interesting," Jack said.53

"Yeah, it is," Earl laughed. "Well, I can be damned sure that being online will surely be an adventure now," he said.54

"Hey Hun, you see Jactac again?" Carlin asked.55

"Na, I hadn't seen him again. Last he said he was gonna get a drink and take a Shit, didn't hear back from him."56

"Damn it, he should've known not to take Pisses and or Shits in the Rockinental bathrooms, doesn't he know that they're experimental? He could hold it, it's only an hour long flight, compared to the shitty flights we used to get on Continental Airlines back before this internet shit."57

And suddenly, Jactac snuck up next to Earl on his left and proudly took the seat.58

"Well well well, we had thought you had fallen in," Carlin said."59

"Na," Jactac said. "I'm having trouble due to my blindness getting around those bathrooms. They're dark as hell, and since there isn't any floor, Cains are useless."60

Jack looked over at Jactac. Specifically, Jack looked at his chest, and saw that Jactac had a tattoo of his name italicized. It was also written in huge, bold letters.61

"I was just wondering, Jactac, why you have a Tattoo of your name when you could have, for example, a PC? It makes perfect sense, we're going on a grand adventure into the internet for real man, know what I'm sayin?"62

"Yeah, I have this tattoo for two reasons. One, is so that I could show off my man tits to girls because I have to take off my shirt to fully expose the Tattoo. Second, so when either a girl or hell, anyone, for that matter, walks up to me and asks what my name is, I either point or tell them to look at my chest. If I was going to a blind convension, that'd be a whole other ball game." He grinned at that.63

"Well I think it's almost time to land, thank god!" Earl exclaimed.64

"Damn it, Jactac said. "I didn't get mobility lessons for the bloody internet yet."65

"Oh well, Earl said. "Blind people could drive now. Either you RTFM that comes with your hovercar, truck, motorcycle or whatever the hell you're gonna get, or you'll be screwed. Oh well, don't have time to explain it to you. You were fucking around in the bathroom for too long, even Carline says that she could flush the toilet and be done before you even got your pants down to do your business." "Are you gonna make your blindness the reason why you spend a bloody hour in the bathroom?"66

"Well in this case, yeah," Jactac said, "I couldn't find the toilet paper to whipe my ass with.67

"So what'd you whipe it with, your hands?"68

"I almost fuckin' did. Found a paper towl despencer and just used that."69

"Well, I didn't use that, got a towl from it of course."70

"Damn it, blind people are so stupid, Earl said.71

"Thanks," Jactac said.72

Suddenly, in about 3.5 seconds, the rocket was about five feet from the ground, landed on the Tarmack in a few more minutes after that. It taxied to the gate where it says "Passports nonexistent. Walk in. Thank you."73

"Well, I start my digital life here." See you guys later." Jack said.74

And with that, he left the group.75

Earl and Carline simply looked at the diaappearing figure of Jack as he simply stepped off the rocket. Then something pulled him out before he disappeared from site.76

"Well what you wanna do hun?" "What are we gonna do about the blind idiot?" Earl asked.77

"Wake him up and tell him to get off. He can learn for himself what we should do, we're all noobs."78

"Agreed."79

Earl lightly tapped Jactac on the shoulder. "Yo, sleepy motherfucker, it's time to get off this rocket."80

"Uh? MMMMMMM. E... Earl?"81

Earl then punched him in the shoulder. "Yo assfuck!"82

"attendants didn't seem to give a damn about Earl's obceen language, as in there training materials it was stated very clearly not to stop it. It was to give the passengers what they would be going through on the internet. Plus, Earl, Jack, Jactac, and probably many others do not know what they will be turned into when they step off of the rocket.83

A robot, complete with a functional brain bigger than they're current ones. Jactac will not be able to see, but he'll be able to read braille at 2,567 words per minute when reading to himself. He will not be able to read to humans this fast however due to the amount of brains that would require. It is estimated that Jactac will have more brains than the others due to, again, his blindness. Jactac will not only have supersonic speed when reading, but he will also have supersonic hearing like so many blind folk back in the day, back before the internet was PWNED/Destroyed.84

Jactac no doubt will also probably be a lab experiment target to get the amount of brainpower that'll be contain in his databanks.85

Jactac had just awoken from slumber, and he felt better and he felt like his normal self again after being on what was possibly the fastest ride to a destination in his life.86

"Just so you know, Earl and Carline, I'm not ever talking to you again. And before you ask, no, I'm not related to Jack, and I already I think I'm starting to not like the trash. Who knows, but I'm outa here. See you on the intergrid! Well to be honest I don't know what the flying FUCK I just said."87

Earl and Carline didn't reply. Jactac simply stood up, his walking cane from California Canes in his left hand, and walked up the small isle to the rocket's exit.88

"SEE YOU FUCKER'S LATER!" Jactac yelled as he stepped off.89