Menx

If ever there was weather for drinking on the beach, it was weather such as this - cold, and wet, and altogether alcoholic. Menx, a tabby not unaccustomed to such weather, takes grey days in his four legged stride. However, tourists, as is their habit, refuse to take anything in their stride. In fact, they positively lunge at the opportunity to fail to take something in their stride. Weren’t they at the Bahamas? Shouldn’t they be showered in sunlight? God damn it, but they were still Americans, and that has to count for something. 1

Menx watches as a cue forms at the complaints desk. 2

“Yes, I’m Richard, here with the Peterson reservation.”3

It’s hard to imagine, but the 15 year old working behind the desk has no idea who the Petersons are, nor why they should be reserved. It’s her first day on the job, and she was meant to be pouring mugs of expensive coffee all day. 4

“Yes,” says Therese in near perfect English. “I understand this must be a real disappointment for you.”5

“A fucking disappointment? Listen, where I come from, I am a very powerful man!”6

And it was true, Richard Peterson is manager of a whole electronic goods department, responsible for such esoteric tasks as stock take and roster management.7

“And where I come from, this kind of thing just doesn’t happen,” he continues, practically frothing at the mouth. “I’ve spent a lot of money bringing the kids down here and the brochure didn’t say anything about shitty weather like this. I mean it’s practically blowing a gale out there!”8

Therese frowns, her cute third world brow crinkling in confusion and slowly brewing irritation. “What is it, exactly, you expect us to do about the weather?”9

“Well…” Richard Peterson is momentarily stumped, until his wife Janice elbows him pointedly in the ribs. “Damnit! It’s just not good enough, is it?”10

Menx stretches, yawns, and pads outside to the shorefront. If he had a thumb and a wallet, he would surely buy himself a decent martini and watch as the sunlight faded. Sadly, he doesn’t, and has to settle for a beautiful view and a beautiful night. 11