Creations MIschief (paragraph)

1

I buried the twig near the newly formed water and sat back to wait. I watched the water roar between the sandy banks as the twig twitched under the ground. Dirt moved to the sides as a small green sprout erupted from the mound. From that moment on other sprouts begin popping up around the valley. In minutes trees of all sizes and shapes dotted the land.

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  • whichcraft Greeters member
    May 13

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    There was a slight tense change within the paragraph otherwise it was very descriptive. There were a few commas missing as well but it didn't take away from the paragraph. It was well written. Thank you for entering and good luck.


  • grey2dragon
    May 13

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    oohhh ... this is magical and succinct and makes me thing very "zen" type of things. i always appreciate the elegant tone of your writing, but this is a cool creation story.

    Good luck to you, my friend!


    • SageSyren Greeters member
      May 13
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      Not sure that paragraph really tells what the whole story is about, but at least it tells most of the story about what happened in that part.
      Thanks for reading and for commenting.
      Brooke