Reconciliations

I was lying there staring at the starry blackness above me. What am I doing here? I've made a terrible mistake. I should have seen this coming. I knew it was inevitable. I watched the clouds drift over the moon slowly. I felt like I couldn't breathe. When would this tortured wait be over? Reconciliation...huh. What was I thinking? A childish dream... What will I have to show for it? A handful of scars? Well that's what I would have if I survived the night. I hear the sharp twang of a bow and I close my eyes waiting for the end. I wait for the blood to seep out of my body leaving my corpse to rot in the sun of tomarrow.1

It didn't come. I open my eyes to see his blood soaked face staring at me intently. I want to scream... maybe then it would be over. His souless green eyes stare at me proving that to him, I am just another pawn, another corpse. I feel my heart thumping against my chest as he pulls out the jagged knife still dripping blood, the reminder that there was another body on the roof top. A dead body. It was all my fault. I was stupid enough to meet him here. I should have known.2

He kneels down and puts the sickly warm blade to my throat. I can't breathe from fear. He starts to drag the blade across my throat in a slow motion. The pain sears through me and instinct takes over. Without thinking I bite his wrist with all my might. He dropps the knife and wrenches his arm away from me. I grab the knife and take off running. I was breathing heavy and my blonde hair streams out behind me. I glance back, my blue eyes full of fear. He was following me with the second knife. The clean knife. I run into someone. I stare at this new puzzle piece with confusion. He stares back with confusion and fear.3

He has brown hair and gorgegous gray eyes. He's wearing a white shirt and a dark pair of pants the are now splattered with my blood. He glances at the maniac running after me with concern in his eyes before grabbing me by the arm and leading me into the twisted labirynth of the hallways inside. I let him drag me away from th maniac in a stumbling run. I feel the warm gooey blood gushing down my body as he pulls me into a dark room.4

"What in the world is wrong with you?" He says as soon as the door is shut. He has a british accent I note.5

"I..I thought that....he was here to apologise....You see... He's my father and well... he left when I was two and I always hoped that he would come back and well I jumped at this chance but I guess that kind of blew up in my face," I manage to stutter out in my Irish accent.6

"Oh," is all he says. All he can say that is, for at that moment the door is wrenched open... by a police officer. I see no immeadiate danger for the next few hours in my oppinion so I faint from fear, blood loss, and exhaustion. I wake up to the boy from my roof top horror holding my hand in the hospital with great concern in his eyes. I smile at him and fall asleep knowing that all is well as long as I'm with my savior.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 5 of 5
  • Very Well Written.

    I enjoyed this story and it is very well written. It is kind of short, but it is complete as it is. I believe you could expand it or continue it into a much larger story. It seems that we came in at the middle of the story.

    Thanks for entering 'For Writers Fourteen Or Under'.

    Andy

  • The writing was top notch,

    Hi Teresa, thank you for entering the contest .

    You certainly have a great imagination and the ability to produce some scary stuff .

    The pace was smooth, the writing clear and the characters visiable.

    The writing was top notch, the pace so brisk it took my breath but I never felt rushed, nor missed anything that was happening .

    You really took me by surprise when you named the mad man as her father.

    And you brought a grin, adding that bit of humor that fit in so effortlessly ‘to think an English man would rescue an Irish lass.’

    You do need a few corrections that you’ll catch on a careful edit. There is nothing so drastic as to interrupt my reading.

    Geri

  • I loved it! Few grammar mistakes, but overall very well written! Keep 'em comin!


  • Tiger-Lily gold member
    May 11

    Edit | Reply
    The tense mix up slight jar me fromthis otherwise wonderfully written piece.

    Wow...her DAD??? Shock horror, etc.Maniacal protector, lol.

    HT

  • Wow that is amazing. You used such good vocabulary. Just one thing, in paragraph 3 'throught' should be 'throat'. But it is REALLY good. Well done.

1 - 5 of 5