Captivation

It's beautiful and awkward all at the same time. I'm not too sure what I'm doing, but it's incredible just the same. Of all my late night fantasies, I've never dared to dream that a kiss could be so... magical.1

Every time he presses his warm lips against mine, my heart skips a beat and my breathing becomes unsteady. With just a simple brush of the lips, all of my troubles have vanished. He has that kind of power over me.2

As crazy as it sounds, I swear I can feel the seven year age difference melting away. So what if I'm eighteen and he's twenty-five? It doesn't make a difference to me. At least, not anymore.3

Once upon a time, I followed the unwritten rules of dating to a T. In the few dates I went on, the guys were never more than a year or two older. Back then, that was the way I liked it.4

And then I met Dean. The moment I saw him, I swear my heart stopped. With his disheveled black hair and glowing russet skin, I was in awe. Never before had I seen such a gorgeous guy. His gorgeous features and nicely toned body were what lead me to realize the obvious: he was way older than me. With that little fact in mind, I vowed to myself to keep my eyes off of him. Besides, there was no way a gorgeous guy like that would want me.5

But, for some absurd reason, he did. The flirting was subtle at first. In its early stages, I convinced myself it was all in my mind. Gradually, though, it increased. It got to the point where he was going out of his way to be around me. By then, there was no going back. I was under his spell of charm and enchantment.6

Somehow this little spell he put me under cracked me out of my shell. For the first time in a long time, I found myself opening up. It was as if I could tell him anything, anything in the world. You want to know the best part? He always seemed to understand.7

By the time prom night rolled around, I was to enthralled by him to go. If he couldn't go as my date, then I wouldn't go at all. I never did ask him if he would be my date. I guess there was no need. I knew that he was too old to go.8

I'm glad I didn't go. Instead of dancing the night away, Dean rented some movies and invited me over for a movie marathon. I think it was after we watched Batman Begins that I told him my biggest secret of all. I don't know why that movie made me think of it, but it did. Somehow it inspired me to tell him that I'd never been kissed.9

A thoughtful smile spread across his face as he carefully brushed a strand of chestnut hair out of my face. It was then that he delicately pressed his lips against mine. And then the magic began.10


I don't think I'll never know why he was so attracted to me. At five foot five, I've never been anything spectacular to look at. My hair, a lovely chestnut, is an unmanageable mess of waves and my brown eyes are hardly breathtaking. And to think that actually used to bother me. Dean tells me that he thinks I'm beautiful just the way I am. You know what? I think I believe him.

Author notes

I think my favorite animal is the wolf.

sushi. and a feel good story.

Santa goes boom! A romantic option.

option 5

This makes me smile so it's my favorite.

love

I read the rules!

Romance

favorite story of yours? When you can live forever...

A contest entry

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have 0. (?) (Line numbers)
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Comments

1 - 35 of 35

  • DaniCM
    October 27
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for entering! I love this story! It is very sweet and innocent! Good luck!
    ~Dani


  • Fish food
    September 9
    Edit | Reply
    I've read this one before in a previous contest, it's a good story! My previous comment still stands Thanks for entering.

  • Wow!
    Man, does Dean sound hot, but anyway...this was really well written. I enjoyed the narrator's shyness and low self esteem. It seems most of the time tiring, but in this it's great!
    Awesome job!


  • Naive.
    June 27
    Edit | Reply
    Aw! This was so sweet! I think I love it so much because it describes how I feel about my current boyfriend. =D ANYWHO, great job on the emotions. This was incredibly adorable and worthy of a bunches of "AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!"s. =] Great job.

    Thanks for entering in my contest and good luck!

    -jj


  • dancindream
    June 27
    Edit | Reply
    This is a really sweet story! <3
    You were able to secribe your characters really well and relate to the main one exceptionally. I actually felt like her whhen reading it. There are soem subtle grammar mistakes, such as confused tenses, but overall a great story.
    Thanks for entering the contest!

    • you entered this story in my new contets and i read it all over again. i loved it again =)

  • love it so so much! and no wonder you won so many awards for this! well done BEST OF LUCK IN THE CONTEST. Thanks for reading the rules.


  • Aaez
    June 22

    Edit | Reply
    Hehe. That's sweet.
    I liked it. Although the tenses seemed a little confused. Or maybe that's just me! Hehe I dunno. But I liked the story all in all.
    Good luck in the contest. ^^

  • awwwww so sweet, a great story but its missing something, really good writing it has, great story line as well maybe it could have been a bit longer

  • Wow, this was so emotional and wonderful! At first I had some sort of doubt but once I read a few more sentences I really liked it!

    Ha ha, I just realized I commented on this already. But, I found something else and I decided I would be lame and comment again. Sorry?

    My only itch with this was how the ending was. How you included his looks while ending this was a little rushed. I think that this could be really good if you added a little more to the ending.

    Thats all, I found no grammar or spelling mistakes! Kudos for you! Keep writing!

    Cheers,

    VW


  • Melli
    June 16
    Edit | Reply
    awhhh....Loved it! It was just so.... flowing and I could feel myself in her. If that makes sence. It was really great though. And to think, I'm in the same contest as you. Well, my chances are blown now. haha thanks for a good read.

    KEEP WRITING!!!

    -Melli<33

  • Awwww this is such a sweet story! Although I wonder about the main characters name but its still great nevertheless. Amazing job! Thanks for entering and keep writing!


  • iBubbles
    June 14
    Edit | Reply
    aww's thats so sweet, i loved this litte story x]]. best of luck in all of your contests xD

  • Fairly good story, but you didn't put alot of description. You didn't even say your main charater's name. However, this story was sweet. I loved it so much!
    Good luck!


    • moonwriter
      June 14
      Edit | Reply
      I didn't want to give her a name. You see, I wanted the reader to be able to envision themself as her. Sort of put their name in where hers wasn't in their heads.

      I'm glad you liked this.


  • Quixotic Greeters member
    June 12
    Edit | Reply
    Commented before. Scroll down. Very well done...enjoyed twice

  • Thanks for your entry. This is a very human story. It reads smoothly and is easy to follow and relate to. I enjoyed the read. Best of luck in my contest.


  • Autumn.Rain
    June 11
    Edit | Reply
    AHHH!! <3

    <333 x 12039584056

    Eep. Love this. What an interesting little idea!! I love how you described the age difference, how it disappears, and the main character's secret. That part - no scratch that, the WHOLE THING is so cute!!

    Grammar and spelling were great. Whew, saved me a lot of trouble. XD

    The only thing I possibly dislike is the ending. I like it... and I don't. I think it's a nice way to end it, but it could be better. It seems a little... disconnected. Like it doesn't specifically relate to kissing Dean or loving him... But then again I still like it.... XP

    Ahhh Awesome job though and good luck in the contest/s!!!!

    <3

    Maureen!!

  • This was good

    This was good but sadly I can only pick three finalists, so sorry.


  • Jenni-Wren
    June 8

    Edit | Reply
    That was fantastic! I'm so happy that the character managed to find a guy as good as this. Grammer and speeilng were great too. Thank you for entering this piece into my contest! I hope to read more of your work in the future.


  • Fish food
    June 6
    Edit | Reply
    You forgot my author's notes! xD

    Good story, I think I've read it before! Well written and very descriptive! I like how you went from "he'll never want me" to "I'm good the way I am"! Grammar and spelling is good too!
    Thanks for entering and good luck!

  • Great story! I love the ending! It's very sweet and real; the details are great and I love how you made the characters different ages.

    My only problem is it's a little short for my contest. I'll try and make an exception.

    Thanks for following my rules!


  • Quixotic Greeters member
    May 21

    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully written and emotionally sound...all i can say is BRAVO!! LOVED IT all the way through...just what i asked for


  • whatami
    May 13
    Edit | Reply
    Hold - Didn't I judge this before?


  • Baisi
    May 11

    Edit | Reply
    aaw. This is soo sweet. It makes you want to date someone like that... Someone who would love me, though I never thought they could...


  • whatami
    May 11

    Edit | Reply
    Some dialogue would have been nice, but this was really, really sup-erb. Your story is very well written, and it really did pick me up. Thanks. Great job, and good luck.


  • Lostskins
    May 10

    Edit | Reply
    Captured love very well. It was a nice, kind of feel good story, which is always good. The ending line is great, makes you feel good for the character.

  • Aw this was a very sweet story. I love how the guy described her as beautiful despite her putting down her plain features. This story is very happy, but at the same time I felt it could have been longer that there could have been some dialouge between the two and that it could have went more in depth but all in all its a good story and I wish you good luck in my contest.

    -Miranda

  • This was very sweet, I love how the guy just went over her house instead of going to the prom with her. Really romantic and shows the guy is a nice one indeed. However, I felt it was too rushed and it should be a little longer. Don't get me wrong, it was great, but just try to include some more details. Thanks for entering my contest!

  • is this a true story?

    i liked it the romance in it is outstanding and breathtaking. wonderful story!

  • A nice love story, if short. But it works. Sometimes love doesn't need a bunch of extravagent details. Great work on this story. I didn't find anything to fix, so that's a plus. Thanks for entering the contest. Good luck!

  • ahhh that was really good and well written I liked it good job you forgot one of my rules though i want to know your favorite animal in your author notes i will check again later i think this story has some good potential again well done and good luck

  • adorablness. thanks for all the sticky lovie goo

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