Fritz O'skennick's Gothic Tales/Touching the darkness...

AGELESS HUNGER.1

I walk among you mortal men,
The ages pass me by.
From blood soaked hands, to war strewn lands,
I feed on those who die.
Before they take their final breath,
The blood still warm inside.
To feed my raging hunger pangs,
Before the shell has died.2

It saddens me to see a world,
Where such as I may roam.
With memories of ancient days,
To far to call my home.
I live and breathe by twilight shades,
I walk denied by all.
My skin no more shall know the sun,
Until my time to fall.3

My soul is torn, for those who mourn,
The souls who wait for death.
They feed me life, and end their strife,
Until their final breath.
To justify this way of life,
A balance must be drawn.
Perceive ye mortal cattle men,
And bless the souls, I mourn.4

So when its time to judge my sins,
Of life and lust partaken.
I know inside, when life’s denied,
My soul shall be forsaken.5


DEATH AND DENIAL.6

The castle walls loomed high above,
Foreboding shadows lie.
Echoes fill the empty halls,
Where ancient spirits pry.
My footsteps ring out loud and true,
My breath before my face.
A shiver travels up my spine,
My heart begins to race.7

Upon the wall, I see a man,
Cast blue by moonlit sky.
He beckons me to come to him,
From battlements on high.
I take the stone steps two by two,
To greet this waiting man.
Transparent in the moonlit haze,
And so his speech began.8

Why do you walk these halls by night?
A shadow man expired.
Your journey ended long ago,
Your body long retired.
I’ve come to help you rest in peace,
He said with hand on heart.
It saddens me to see a soul,
Too tortured to depart.9

You’re wrong I said, its you who’s dead,
I see through where you stand.
He shook his head and then he said,
I know, please understand.
The choice is yours, believe or not,
For you now to decide.
Walk these halls forevermore,
Or face the fact you died.10

Within my heart, his words rang true,
Shot down in war, I fell.
Have I walked these halls so long?
Denying death so well?
I take his hand to bring me peace,
Embrace what I deny.
So blind was I, for far too long,
I bid this world goodbye.11

12

I SOLD MY SOUL FOR CHICKEN WINGS!13

Torrential rain and blackened sky, the day I sold my soul.
Foreboding dark and lightening strike, as thunder starts to roll.
I stand beheld by shadows dark, a train that never comes.
Well this is great, my train is late, my feet and toes are numb.
Rumble, grumble, gurgle, roar, the hunger pains are back.
I didn't have a chance to eat, the food and drink I lack.
I'd kill to eat a scabby horse, or eat the scraps thrown out.
I'd sell my soul for chicken wings, just meat with bones cut out.14

Behold a man in red and black, a smile upon his face.
He beckons me to talk with him, a soul so far from grace.
He held before me contract type, and quill that drips blood red.
'Just sign here, and here, and here, and so you shall be fed'.
I signed the form in triplicate, anticipate my feast.
Saliva dribbled down my chin, my hunger pains increased.
A bucket full of chicken wings appeared before my eyes.
Just meat and skin, no bones within, a smell you can't deny.15

'Be seeing you', so said the man, 'my business here is done'.
He faded in a puff of smoke, but laughing cause he'd won.
So many different chicken wings, some spicy, plain and sweet.
I gorge myself in greasy joy, a tasty, costly treat.
I sold my soul for chicken wings, the best I've ever tried.
The memories of that costly treat, will haunt me til i've died.
And then beyond, the Devil's due, my soul for wings was bought.
Damnation for eternity, no solice can be sought.16

How stupid we, as mortal men, can be in weakened state.
I sold my soul for chicken wings, for me it is to late.
Heed my words, behold my tale, eternal soul be burned.
So weak was I to chicken wings, a lesson must be learned.17

18

MONSTER.19

Upon a rooftop in a storm, the lightening gave me life.
The gothic towers a beacon to, my birth by lightening knife.
Convulsive pain, I scream inside, a man made man unfree.
My birth, a curse upon the earth, abomination be.
Discarded from the Baron’s grace, I walked the Earth alone.
Despised by man, a monster be, until my mind had grown.20

I learned to read and then to write, a blind man’s deed, so kind.
But still I felt alone inside, my need for love, a bind.
I then set out to find the man, who made me what I am.
From bits and bobs of corpses past, and so my life be damned.
Behold creation at your door, the man made by your hand.
Denied, he ran from coast to coast, across the sea and land.21

I need a bride or mate for life, behold my heartened plea.
Deny me not and make me whole, and then I’ll leave you be.
Deny me now and face my wrath, your life shall be undone.
For I shall take your love from you, like me, you’ll be but one.
So full of pride, he made my bride, unknown, she should deny.
The kindred soul in such as I, no matter how I tried.22

Enraged I fled, my need unfed and joined a circus fair.
A Freak Show seen by one and all, alone without a care.
The decades came and centuries past, until this modern day.
I now can pass as human stock, immortal man displayed.
My wounds are healed, my scars are gone, and so I seek once more.
A mate to walk through life with me, and face what lies in store.23

24

PRINCE CHARMING.25

I travel through the countryside,
On steed, I’m riding tall.
As black as night, my stead in flight,
I’m drawn as voices call.
Please come to me, my one true love,
Behold my body still.
With skin so cold, yet never old,
Thy prophecy fulfilled.26

Just one kiss to bring me life,
And end this wicked curse.
Who is this girl before my eyes?
Who speaks these words in verse.
Her skin so pale, the air so stale,
A corpse in twilight glade.
Is it wrong to lust and long,
For dead girls flesh displayed?27

I kneel beside my corpse like bride,
And kiss her lips so cold.
Her opened eyes find mine and pry,
As life for her takes hold.
A feral smile of malice born,
Distorts her beauty fair.
Her eyes as dark as blackest night,
Revealed in moonlight’s glare.28

She bites my flesh, my senses numb,
My heart pounds in my head.
Consume my soul within my shell,
Dispel this passing dread.
So now I breathe my final breath,
She holds me in her arms.
Hunt with me, my one true love,
Embrace these sinful charms.29

She takes my hand and leads me free,
A bloodlust fills my mind.
And so we feed throughout the land,
Unknown by all mankind.30

31

LYCANTHROPY.32

Why does the moon affect me so,
When full in darkened sky.
A searing pain inside my brain,
A blackout time is nigh.
Bones are cracking, limbs deform,
My voice becomes a growl.
The pain I feel is all too real,
My cry becomes a howl.33

A rage inside and lust for blood,
Beneath the moonlight’s gaze.
The world blacks out, I know no more,
Until the dawning rays.
I wake up naked and confused,
My nails are caked with blood.
Metallic taste within my mouth,
I’m sick into the mud.34

Where have I woken up today?
A park or maybe zoo?
This sickness seems to rule my life,
I don’t know what to do.
A flash of blood, a tear of flesh,
Disjointed in my mind.
Am I mad? Or do I change?
This beast and I entwined.35

With wolfsbain shots and silver cross,
I prey unto my lord.
Spare my soul, this sickness curse,
And evil spirits ward.
The time has come to choose the way,
To end this evil curse.
Silver bullet through my mind.
So ends this tragic verse.36

The victim souls of killings past,
Can rest by what’s in store.
For when they lay me down to rest,
My soul shall know no more.37

38

THE HERO’S GRAVE.39

Looking at the tombstones, of those who’ve lived and died.
Thinking of their funerals, the people who have cried.
What was it like in their day, was there one like me.
Looking at the tombstones, thinking life is short but free.40

All the stones are big and wrote, all of them but one.
Its small and partly buried, it’s a shadow in the sun.
The boy he was a pauper boy, a hero live and dead.
Who sacrificed himself for them, for a bullet in the head.41

Looking back the years in time, to see what happened then.
Satan risen up from Hell, and taking souls of men.
This boy he was a fighter, a hero sent from God.
The power of good upon his side, and light shone where he trod.42

He set off on his journey, to face the Devil’s wrath.
The darkness came and shrieked its rage, as Satan broke his path.
A rain of fire did scorch the land, his shield his faith in good.
The seas did boil and blood run cold, yet still our hero stood.43

The boy brings forth his book of faith, and quotes in Hebrew verse.
And banishes the Evil one, to end this wicked curse.
Demons screech and Angels cry, the boy fulfils his quest.
But Satan’s parting gift to him, ensures he’ll never rest.44

Possessed by Demons raging hate, oh fragile mortal mind.
He begs his fellow men to end, his pain bestowed unkind.
They kiss his cheek, perform last rights, with tears in their eyes.
A gun shot echoes through the land, and so our hero dies.45

46

AND SO SHE COMES...47

She rises from the depths,
Silently, slowly, unseen.
She is Earth, Wind, Fire and Water.
Awakened from deep slumber,
In this planet's time of despair.48

She is the World.
A personification of the elements.
She is Rage, Sorrow and Retribution.
Poison and Pestilence decay her mass,
And so she comes, unseen...49

She is the destroyer, the cure.
Her will is pure and resolute,
She will burn this sickness from her,
This humanity, that defiles her oceans.
And pains her with toxins.50

She is eternal,
She was formed in the fires of creation,
She is the bearer of life, the giver of love.
Beware, for humanity's time is nigh,
And so she comes, unseen...51

52

AWAKEN MY LOVE...53

Doth thou see through mine eyes?
Thy words reflect me
like some divine mirror to my soul.
Would’st thou know me if I stood before thee in flesh?
Awakened in darkness,
I find thee and know ye walk this Earth once more.54

My heart once cold,
becomes an ember of yearning,
Fanned by the flames of passion I hold for thee, my love.
Much time has passed,
and so in fiction shalt thee find truth,
And know that I long for thee dearly.55

So long have I slept,
passing through lifetimes in restless slumber,
Anticipating that which I could not perceive.
Awaken my love…
Awaken with new eyes and know without doubt,
The true depths of my adoration for thee.56

If I am to wait another lifetime, then so be it.
Fore I would’st not force my attentions upon thee,
Whill’st thy memories remain forsaken.
Fear not the awakening, for although the pain be vast.
Thine eyes shalt know enlightenment.57


Remember me………58

59

IMMORTAL DREAMS60

I am darkness… I am the oncoming storm…
I am the vessel et morti…
My dreams transcend the ages, but always…
Thou art there…
Fear me not, fore I wish thee no harm.
If I pursue thee with passion,
Then know it be for love…61

I reach for thee and find thy heart is open,
And beats as one with mine…
Thou hast doubts to be sure,
Yet ye give’th thy self so freely, resisting not,
For the garrison’s guard thy heart no longer.
And I will gladly find my place in the darkness of thy soul.
But alas, I’ve always been there.62

Forgive me, my love…
For these immortal dreams weigh heavy upon my soul,
And in rebirth, I am a subject to their whims.
My soul doth grow weary of this accursed burden,
Toused from lifetime to lifetime,
Perceiving that which no man should.
Nor for sooth, would he choose too.63

I am undone… I am so very tired…
Mine ancient eyes torment me with memories,
Of sin and debauchery of lifetimes past.
Yet how can I justify mine actions to this modern age?
I must atone to that which make’th me immortal.
Thy words, and dreams of thine embrace, sustain me,
And from my adoration for thee, I draw solace and strength.64

For I truly am the Immortal… Your Immortal…65


DARKNESS RISING.66

Darkness rising, calls to me,
Be still, my beating heart.
Hate subsiding, leave me be,
The darkness is my art.
Embracing darkest thoughts within,
A door that stands ajar.
Chasing childhood fantasies,
So near and yet so far.67

To touch upon the darkest mind,
My fingers numb with cold.
I touch upon a world within,
And feel its grip take hold.
Chattered teeth and numbing pain,
My flesh is torn apart.
I feel reborn inside my mind,
Embrace my lonely heart.68

The door I spoke of stays ajar,
So soon to open wide.
Engulf me in its blanket cold,
With no where warm to hide.
Each time I leave, is harder still,
To tear away and roam.
The saddest truth of all to bare,
Within my mind, I’m home.69

70

HAPPINESS IS A COLD RAZOR.71

The darkness building up inside,
My mind and flesh are numb.
So cold this shell, in which I dwell,
And so my demons come.
Why can’t I feel no joy, no pain,
My God, I’m dead inside.
I need to end this living death,
My senses have denied.72

A sharpened blade on naked flesh,
It rests before the slide.
I take a breath, defy the death,
And let the razor glide.
A line is formed in razor’s wake,
As blood stampedes the slit.
It drips and runs, it stings and stuns,
A recess from the shit.73

I feel again, I smile and cry,
I need to go again.
I place the blade back in the slit.
So deep, so strange, Amen!!!
The flesh is warm, the blade is cold,
And so my senses reel.
An alien tip inside my flesh,
There must be more to feel.74

I lay back holding hand to wound,
Like a junkie with a fix.
I laugh and cry, I smile and wince,
My brain needs pain for kicks.75

76

NAPALM STRIKE.77

The blades are stirring, spinning round.
The helicopters come.
Far off a whirring, droning sound,
A target has succumbed.
A napalm strike lights up the sky,
A yellow haze enshrouds.
People fall and people call,
Within this yellow cloud.
They cough and burn and cry in pain,
Relieved by deaths embrace.
As skins peel off and lungs collapse,
Our foe, he has no face.78

My eyes they burn, my sight is gone,
And so my senses numb.
Is this death and my last breath,
Or is there more to come.
I hear a distant whirring sound,
The helicopters leave.
Everyone I know is dead,
And no ones left to grieve.
Was the cause I fought in vain?
Did I believe a lie?
Our leaders promised hope and peace,
Then left us here to die. 79

80

HOLLOW MAN…81

Twisted knots of fear within,
this cramped and foetal frame.
Flesh is ripe for cutting now,
as demons call my name.
A single tear is all that comes,
there must be more to feel.
Why must it always come to this?
As blood and thoughts congeal.82

Cigarettes with embers bright,
goose-pimpled blistered skin.
Fighting off delusion’s grasp,
and surfaced thoughts within.
Illusions born in fantasy,
cascade inside my mind.
Why do I blind myself to truth?
And all delusions find.83

Shattered dreams and splintered mind,
with thoughts all left unspoken.
Suppressed inside, alone, denied,
discarded toy so broken.
Emotions numb in blackest void,
fragmented shards of pain.
Despair the rising demon songs,
that dance within my brain.84


DAMAGED GOODS…85

Little pinpricks of cold
Seeping through the cracks in my mind.
I hammer desperately at the cramps within,
as numbness sighs like Winter’s waking breath.
It stretches it’s wings in a blanket of ice,
consuming me, freezing me with it’s touch.
And so I weep unseen…86

Voices rage in a maelstrom of thoughts,
awakening the darkness once more.
Must it always be this way?
Always seeing, yet an empty shell in it’s shadow cast.
Paralysis creeps through my cranium
like a dormant assassin, unseen, unfelt,
yet always so devastating.87

I’m so alone, bestowed as I am
with these accursed demons.
I’m losing my mind,
Piece by piece, fragment by fragment,
It drains away into a void of self loathing and despair.
If I should mourn my loss of self,
Then I weep for who I was… or who I should be…88

…Or who I could be…89

Help me……………90


PSYCHIC PSYCHOSIS…91

Spectres in the unseen darkness,
lacking substance, gaining strength.
Whispered voices, raging shouts,
questioning, telling and unyielding.
Sepulchral shadows cast in empty rooms,
forsaken by time and memory.
Awakened and drawn by insomniatic lullabies.92

Prophetic dreams, eclectic visions,
altered states of consciousness and self.
Thoughts transcending space and time,
blurred, chaotic and confused.
Unwritten potentials of infinite choices,
confined in metaphysical reality.
Conceived, perceived, and sensed by few.93

Unknown faces revealed,
in perception’s twilight mood swings.
Projected thoughts from faceless crowds,
emotional bombardment in the wake of strangers.
Overcrowded in solitude, deafened in silence,
Death’s sonnet written through living flesh.
Fated… gifted… cursed…94

And shrink’s diagnose it as schizophrenia...95


SUBCONSCIOUS STORM…96

She is so lost…
Her thoughts once so clear,
become a storm of emotion.
Feelings she thought she had long buried,
surface in a torrent of rage, despair and desperation.
She wants to flee and seek solace in seclusion,
but alas, events have spiralled too far out of control.
The solace she seeks fades in a sea of confusion,
and she realises she is truly alone. 97

She is broken…
Disappointment of self rains down hard on her,
she mentally berates herself,
for allowing him back into her life once more.
Seduced by his charms and lies she regresses,
to become the girl she left behind so long ago.
She has mourned this memory for far too long,
and it stings her like an open cut.
Her open heart, her only folly.98

She is so alone…
Or so she thinks, for another steps into her life.
He shines a new hope on her turmoil, a way out.
But she is not ready to heed his attentions,
and covets the fading solitude.
She needs time to lick her wounds,
ease the burden that weighs heavy on her soul.
She needs time to mend her broken heart,
Before she can give it to another.99


THE FIRE WITHIN.100

There’s a chair in my head, by a bed,
I sit and watch the world,
Going by, makes me cry,
I feel my rage unfurl.101

With thoughts not my own, set in stone,
A stranger in my head,
Changing rules, choking fools,
To grind my morning bread.102

My mind, petrified, thoughts denied,
My shifting memories change,
Changing mood, makes me brood,
Is it me? It seems so strange.103

There’s a fire in my head, burns the bed,
Engulfs me in the chair,
Burning cold, taking hold,
Beyond the point of prayer.104

I sit undisturbed, unperturbed,
A cleansing fire within,
Burning flesh, thoughts are fresh,
To weak to fight, give in.105

There are tears in my eyes, I despise,
A world engulfed by pain,
People hurt, eating dirt,
All scorched inside my brain.106

I sit here unmoved, nothing proved,
Milk of human kindness gone,
Drained away, day to day,
Too late to right the wrong.107


LEST WE FORGET.108

We walked along the forest path,
dry leaves fell at our feet.
So lost were we upon that day,
in Autumn’s cooling heat.
The sun peeped through the browning trees,
a breeze as cold as death.
The shadows danced upon the wind,
like Winter’s waking breath.109

We huddled close and on we trod,
the wind hard at our back.
To push us on along the path,
with strength our limbs did lack.
Then suddenly our limbs were free,
we toppled to the ground.
We see ahead a battle waged,
an ancient war unbound.110

With swords they fight, these armoured men,
to death and then beyond.
A battle fought forever more,
poor tortured souls, be gone.
Remember us, forsake us not,
or lest we be forgotten.
To fight this battle evermore,
for lands and sons begotten.111

The voices fade, the wind is gone,
once more the trees are still.
The Autumn day regains its hold,
by Nature’s force of will.
A hole is formed where battle raged,
with armoured bones therein.
Confirming doubts of sanity,
that fought to rise within112

What did we see that Autumn day?
An ancient savage war?
Did we put those souls to rest?
At peace forever more?
Remember now, the deeds of men,
some born of Evil grown
Can never rest a victim’s soul,
until the truth is known.113


FARE THEE WELL!114

Hello, can you here me?
Before I fade away.
Mellow when you're near me,
The king with feet of clay.
I sit here with a heart of stone,
The days just pass me by.
The child inside is all alone,
cocooned inside a lie.
I wonder if he hears me,
Cause he's the last to try.
I wonder if he fears me,
Goodbye! 115

116

FRACTIONS OF LIFE...117

I’ve got that feeling,
With each passing breath.
Waking up each morning,
One day closer to death.118

One third of life we’re dormant,
Resting in our pits.
One eighth of life we’re hungry,
Or scrabbling round for bits.119

One third of life we’re working,
To make our life alright.
One tenth of life stood at a bowl,
Or sat, whatever’s right.120

One tenth of life we’re making love,
To those for whom we care.
To some a form of conquest,
Commitment makes them scared.121

One eighth of life in sickness,
To some, a little more,
With the little time we have left,
We hate and fear and war. 122


SLEEPLESS.123

Tick- tock, tick- tock, The day doth fade.
Click lock, take stock, Thy soul decayed.
Twilight, my night, The dark descends.
Take flight, make right, The cold ascends.124

Thump, thump, thump, thump, Mine heart doth speak.
Hard lump, cold stump, My pain doth peak.
Like gas, no mass, It creeps and shrouds.
To pass through glass, And sightless clouds.125

I fight the night, Dead shadows bleed.
My night, my plight, My demons feed.
My mind, unkind, My voices rage.
My bind to find, A wordless page.126

They call, I scrawl, My fingers bleed.
I fall, I crawl, An end, I plead.
My brain in pain, Bring forth the dawn.
insane, restrain, Embrace the morn.127


THE HOLE IN MY HEAD.128

I toppled out of bed one day,
Thinking what a life I’ve led.
I looked around and there it was,
A hole inside my head.
This hole reflected on my life,
Of all I’ve done and said.
It proved I have nothing to show,
I’ve lived when I am dead.
BUGGER!!!129

130