Creation Mischief Part 7

I stood in front of the solid oak door, fidgeting. I had never felt nervous around him, but now I was—and a bit scared. 1

The pranks I had played in the past had always been harmless. I had even caught one or two Masters chuckling behind their hands. I had gone too far this time. I shouldn't have taken that scale. I had no excuse and knew I was in for it.2

I started to turn and leave the dank hallway, when the door swung open with a crash and Mastercreator Ruben’s bearded face peered through the crack. "Thought I heard someone,” he mumbled, running his fingers through his hair absently. "Well, come in.”3

He left the door and weaved his way through the clutter. As before, there wasn't a clear place on any of the tables that sat in the room. Branches, leaves, and dried flowers were thrown together in piles, while papers were scattered here and there.4

I stepped in and immediately went to my usual spot near the east window. "Masterkeeper Brock said you wanted to see me, sir."5

Turning his back to me, he said clearly, “Do you think you are the first to take an unauthorized scale or piece of vegetation?” He paused as he shuffled through the large stack of loose papers. “I have a list somewhere of others. I just can’t seem to find it.” With each word, he overturned a different stack.6

“Ummm sir-,” I interrupted his mumbling.7

He looked up startled, as if he had forgotten I was even there. “Oh yes, Sabrina?”8

I pointed to a piece of paper that was sticking out of his breast pocket. “Would that be it?”9

Master Ruben patted his pocket, before taking it out. “Oh yes, it is.” He cleared his throat as he glanced at the paper. “Well, would you look at this?”10

I walked to his side. On the paper, a list of names ran the length. Some familiar, like Madara - Mastercook; she is the chief chef of the school right now, Kellin -Masterlibrarian; he just retired, Sunsaray - Mastergardener; legendary creator of the Jump Circle and some unfamiliar, Parker - Masterbookkeeper, Bianca-Mastermagician; retired. One name caught my eye, Ruben.11

“Master Ruben, you are on this list.” I was astounded. The most respected Master at the school was on a list where my name was soon to be.12

Master Ruben smiled down at me, patted my arm and replied, “Yes, my dear. I wasn’t always a Master, you know? I, at one point, was just a student and couldn’t stop learning or getting into trouble.” He touched his gnarled finger to the side of his nose.13

“Not you!”14

His eyebrows came together and lines appeared on an otherwise smooth forehead. “And why not me?”15

“Well, for one thing you’re a master and for another-.” I paused. “Well, I can’t think of another one.”16

He laughed from his belly, a deep rumbling laugh that sounded like it should come from a bigger man. After a slight hesitation, I joined in. He laughed until tears dripped from his eyes. I had stopped a while before that, unsure if I should really be laughing.17

He wiped his cheeks before clearing his throat. “Oh my dear, thank you for that. I haven’t laughed so hard in years. Sabrina, while I don't condone you taking that scale, I can understand it. You are a curious and impulsive young girl. And you are doing some amazing things, but you- we, need to focus on your studies.”18

I looked up from the list to find Master Ruben watching me closely. "Sir, my studies are going fine."19

He shook his head while grabbing my shoulders. "You must focus more. I need you ready." He gently squeezed my shoulders before dropping his hands. Master Ruben turned his back to me.20

"Ready? Ready for what?" I asked.21

"You will take Kyle and go back to Deter Fourteen. You are to observe the serpent, then report back to me. Directly to me."22

He turned to me; his cheeks above his moustache and beard were blotchy red. "Do you understand me?"23

I searched his face for any indication that he was disappointed with me. His eyes were clear blue, so pale you could imagine the polar ice caps paled in comparison. Around his eyes, the worry lines were no more vivid than earlier. The only changes were his cheeks.24

"Yes sir, I understand." I started for the door. "Master Ruben, sir?"25

He glanced up from the list. "Kyle and I, we together, make larger things happen." The words rushed out before I could stop myself.26

He nodded slowly, gray strands of hair slipping down across his cheeks. "This I have noticed. We will talk more about that when the two of you return."27

I shut the door softly, walked the few feet down the cluttered hall, stepped into the sun, and felt it warm my chilled skin.28

* * *29

I found Kyle with his freckled nose stuffed in an oversized book with scrolled letters, in the Second Level library. The lettering was in a language I didn't understand.30

"What's ya got there?" I whispered in his ear from behind.31

He jumped and colored slightly. "It's Thurnic, from three thousand years ago," he replied without turning. 32

I pulled out a red cushioned chair beside him. The familiar and relaxing smells of dusty books and dried ink surrounded me like a fire-warmed blanket on a bitter cold night.33

“Three thousand years? What’s it about?" I asked, pushing his hand out of the way so I could see the strange words.34

He slapped my hand as I tried to pull the book closer. The sound was like thunder in the solemn room and it echoed in the silence. "After I spoke to Carmen, she did a little digging for us. Well, really me. I think she's sweet on me. Gets all red and stutters over her words when I'm around."35

I rolled my eyes. "Get on with it." I knew he was telling me this to see my reaction, so I remained calm. Inside, I burned. My stomach clenched like someone had reached inside and twisted with the strength of three men. This was a new feeling for me and I wasn't sure what to make of it or if I liked it.36

"Anyways, she found this book in Masterlibrarian Kellin's secret stash." He continued.37

"I thought Masterlibrarian Kellin retired?" I asked, thinking of the list I had seen in Master Ruben’s study.38

Kyle nodded. "He did, has. But he hasn't cleaned out his study yet." 39

"What does this book say?"40

"It seems that in 7582, a young man by the name of Easton-."41

"Easton is a family name." I interrupted. 42

"Whose family name?" Asked Kyle. 43

"Mine, you goof." I slapped his upper arm.44

He rubbed it like I had really hurt him, while giving me an injured look. I twirled my hand in the air to hurry him along. 45

"Well this guy Easton, he could also make plants change. It goes into what kinds he could change." Kyle stopped there and read silently. I watched as his lips move quietly, translating the words.46

I searched my memory for when I had heard the name Easton. If I remembered correctly, Easton had been the name of the first male child born to each member of the family. No male had been born in this generation.47

I tapped Kyle on the arm and he looked up with a questioning look. He looked cute with one of his sun-bleached brows arched and his lips pulled down in a frown. "What are some of the things he did? Give me examples." I whispered, as I poked at the tan page.48

Kyle nodded before scanning the page. "Here’s something-" He pointed to a jumble of words that made no sense to my tired eyes. "According to this, he once made a whole bed of blue Love In Mist change to orange Marigolds."49

"Is that it? Did he do anything bigger?" I asked, pushing a stray strand of hair behind my ear.50

Kyle continued to scan down the page, and then stopped before the last paragraph. "Well, he changed a purple and white striped hyacinth into a buttercup-yellow climbing rose."51

"But nothing in the tree category or volcanoes?"52

He shook his head slowly before sticking a finger in his mouth.53

I frowned while biting my lower lip. "Ok, let's just assume that this Easton person is a great, great, great, great and so on grandfather, uncle, etc."54

“Whoa, where's this coming from?" he asked as he shut the book. Carmen walked by at that time. She tossed her straight, black hair over one shoulder as she wiggled her fingers at Kyle. After her gesture of hello, she glared at me, while Kyle blushed. 55

It was my turn to raise an eyebrow. "Wow, didn't see that coming."56

"W-what?" Kyle asked.57

“Nothing-" I dismissed it with a wave. "As far back as anyone in my family can remember, there has always been an Easton." 58

"Your father's name isn't Easton, is it?" He whispered, leaning in close to me.59

I became aware of his heat and the smell of crisp apples, like someone had just taken a bite. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply, taking in the sweet, refreshing aroma. I backed away quickly, unsure of what was happening.60

"No, but I remember my grandfather was named Easton and other males with the name of Easton. What if this man was part of my family?” I shrugged as I sat back hard. Dust particles floated up around me, caught in the sunbeams. 61

"If it is, what does that mean for you?"62

"Again I don't know. Are there other references to these strange happenings?" 63

"Nothing as of yet, but I've just started." He countered. "So what happened with Master Ruben?"64

I had completely forgotten why I had come to find Kyle in the first place. "I need you to come with me to Deter Fourteen. We are to watch." 65

"Watch what? The serpent?" he asked, smiling wide.66

"Yes. Stop looking so smug." I shook my head.67

Kyle eagerly sat forward. "So, when do we leave?" 68

"As soon as we stop by the kitchen. I'm sure Mastercook Madara is waiting with our packs. You know how word travels around here."

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Edited 5-13

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Comments

1 - 20 of 20

  • tallblondie gold member
    April 4, 2009

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    All the previous 'sneaky theifs' are all currently Masters or retired Masters - interesting and it demonstrates to the reader that Sabrina is of this 'class' of creator as well - or at least can be if she hones her skills. And it seems that nothing goes unnoticed by the Masters either. I quite enjoyed the scene in the library - the awkwardness between the pair when another girl - possibly a rival - is introduced. I especially enjoyed the descriptive imagery in this section, in particular where you describe the dust motes floating in a beam of sunlight. Overall, and interesting and engaging read.


    • SageSyren Greeters member
      April 4, 2009
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      I just hope I don't over due the jealousy and the relationship. This story isn't about their love affair and more about creating. But I want a little romance.

      Thanks for reading
      Brooke


  • Lawrie gold member
    April 1, 2009

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    So Sabrina got away with it and Master Ruben doesn't seem to be as bad as I thought

    I liked the idea of slipping in some jealousy on the part of Sabrina, and also the fact one of her ancestors may have caused some kind of havoc down the years.

    I think this is hotting up now and I can't wait to see what happens when they go back to spy on the Serpent.

    Good story and great writing


    • SageSyren Greeters member
      April 4, 2009
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      I wanted to show that there are other relationships in this 'school' then just the four I've introduced so far. I don't want to overwhelm the reader with too many characters and in this type of story I've seen it happen.

      I don't think the serpent part is all that exciting, but more informative.
      Thanks for reading
      Brooke


  • Lady Eventide Greeters member
    March 29, 2009

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    You know, the way you describe how Sabrina feels for Kyle...I think you might make your reader fall in love with him. His very presence, his smells, the way he does this or that, and even her jealousy when he's nice to other girls.

    On the whole, I enjoyed this chapter...just as I did chapters previous, but I feel that this one is cutting to the chase. We've gotta find out why Sabrina can transform things. We've gotta get back to watch the serpent. So, you deliver. Awesome!

    I do see a few things that I would suggest modifying, so I will send them to you via IM. Well done and thanks for continuing to post this in the group. I'm SO addicted.


    • SageSyren Greeters member
      March 29, 2009
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      Wow, and thanks. I was hoping readers would find him appealing. I like him

      I am on those typos and there seems to be quite a few this time
      Thanks again
      Brooke


  • Abstract Muse gold member
    March 28, 2009

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    The only other typo I noticed was...
    p31. "What's ya got there," I whispered... needs a question mark.

    Her meeting with Rubin turned out pretty good. It was amusing to find his name was on the list as well. And he does seem to be aware of Sabrina and Kyle's combined talent.
    It was also interesting to find the name relation between her and the man Kyle read about making plant transformations long ago. Hereditary talent perhaps? Hmm.

    This chapter has a nice bit of humor thrown into the mix. And did I detect a small bit of jealousy there?
    It flows smoothly from the last chapter and the overall storyline is building nicely.
    It will be interesting to see how things go when they go back to Deter Fourteen to check on the 'serpent'.

    I like how you're developing the story and look forward to seeing where you take it.
    So let's find out.
    Greg


    • SageSyren Greeters member
      March 29, 2009
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      Thanks Greg and I hope I don't disappoint with the next part with the serpent.
      I wanted the reader to see how Sabrina being herelf was a good sign of a leader, because I think that is where this is headed. Like Ruben is grooming her to eventually take over. Not soon and not without a lot of objections from the other Master but something like that

      Thanks again Greg
      Brooke


  • Tricia3 gold member
    March 27, 2009

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    Great as usual

    This is really a great tale. I hope you continue with it for many more chapters...in fact, a novel would be nice.

    Trish


  • artaq
    March 23, 2009

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    I truly love the friendship between Kyle and Sabrina. I knew Master Ruebon would be cool.. He just gave off that vibe.A little jelousy going on .. I think
    You delivered the back story information well, it flowed smoothly and I wasn't bored reading it because of what was going on with Kyle and Sabrina.

    beginning: 5, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 4, dialog: 4, characters: 5.


    • SageSyren Greeters member
      March 23, 2009
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      I thought as particular part was quite well done. I was hesitant about the relationship between the two but I now think it coming along just fine.

      Glad you liked it.

      Brooke


  • Collingwood08
    May 28, 2008

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    Great Story

    I know I havn't read your other chapters, but I love how you describe the character's and the background in detail. Also the dialog flows smoothly. It draws the reader in to wanting more.

    One query though, I'm not sure whether the word dank was meant to be the word dark, The passage reads, (I started to turn and leave the dank hallway,).

    Overall a very good read. When I get around to it, I will read the previous chapters.

    beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 4, dialog: 4, characters: 5.


  • gerifitzsimmons gold member
    May 10, 2008

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    Everything moves your plot along perfectly.


    Brooke, I have read some of this story before. I liked it then, I adore it now. You have a delicious mixture of humor, romance and fantasy; sprinkled with a bit of jealousy. All great stuff for the genre you are working in .

    The activity compliments the dialogue so we can see and hear the characters. Everything moves your plot along perfectly and makes this reader interested in continuing the story.

    Some things to look at:

    Turning his back to me he said clearly, “do (Do) you think you are the first
    With each word he over turned (overturned) a different stack.6

    Master Ruben smiled down at me, patted my arm and replied, “yes (Yes,), my dear.

    He wiped his cheeks before clearing his throat. “Oh my dear, thank you for the that. (just that—the hasta go bye bye.)

    the worry lines were no more vivid then earlier. (hmmm? more than)

    "Its (It’s ) Thurnic, from three thousand years ago," he replied without turning. 32

    "Here’s something-" he (He) pointed to a jumble of words that made no sense to my tired eyes.

    "Watch what? The serpent?" He (he) asked, smiling wide.66

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


    • SageSyren Greeters member
      May 13, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks for reading and for commenting. I have gone through and fixed those mistakes.
      Again thanks
      Brooke


  • Asfand
    May 10, 2008
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    “do you think you are the first to take ..."
    ---> Do, right?

    “yes, my dear. I wasn’t always a Master, you know?
    ---> Yes


    i love the characters, extrememly responsive, alive, well-structured and perfect chemistry. i adored Ruben. i think this is an excellent chapter: just two scenes but alot happens. very nice style of writing.

    i think i could do with more descriptions. you have plotline, dialogue and interaction at one side, and the descriptions are mostly left out. if you put in some more description, blend them dialogue and action - it would be fantastic.

    all in all -- thumbs up!


    • SageSyren Greeters member
      May 13, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Hmmmm, now that's a new one. I don't think I've every been told to add more descriptions. Usually ppl want me to take some out . Ok I will go through and add more. Thanks for finding the errors.
      Brooke


      • Asfand
        May 13, 2008

        Edit | Reply

        LOLx. different opinions are confusing!

        what i wanted to say was; well you have description regarding emotion but other than that, it's just emotion and dialogue. something that describes the picture might intrigue us more and give us a clearer scene to visualize. try that five senses formula in every new scene, that helps me alot.


  • Amicus2K9
    April 27, 2008

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    Excellent!

    Haven't been on the site much, but remember this story and was pleased to see another episode posted. And I like this story, like your characters and the plot and the subtle and teasing interplay you have created and intensified in this part.

    P12 L2 'were' = 'where?'

    P15 L1 'other wise' 'otherwise' one word?

    P61 L3 'Partial' = 'particle?'

    Almost a perfect edit, good work! These little dribs and drabs of story make me impatient to sit and read several chapters at one time....hurry and publish the entire story!!!


    Amicus...


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