Ivorly

Ivorly bit into the sweet plum. She was in the forest, deep in the night.Softly, Ivorly heard behind her back, " You're lucky... " She hopped aside , missing a fierce tackle from behind her. " That you're an elf." The dark figure added. Ivorly noticed that he seemed to be a vampire. " We are going to destroy that puny village- drink all their pitful blood- and then kill them." The figure replied with dark-purple, glowing, eyes. Hunger was written all over them. " Is that so...?" Ivorly mocked. 1

" Save them- if you can." The vampire said. And with that, turned into a bat, and flew off into the darkness. Ivorly finished her plum. She fixed her long, dark-blue, hair. " Funny...........vampires are funny..........." She said aloud happily. Then, Ivorly hopped gracefully away.....giggling. 2

The next day, Ivorly was standing in the village, with all the villagers huddled in the center of the village. She wore a short, peachy, leather dress, a vine-like bracelet, a rose in her blue hair, and was bare- foot. All that was even CLOSE to a weapon was a small, rusty, bell in her hand. The villagers were very panicked, and as a result- wispering among themselves.3

" How is she going to fight them off??? She only has: a rose in her hair, a rusty bell, and a leafy bracelet!" A woman exclaimed loudly. Ivorly giggled, and only smiled. Giggling, she went over to the woman and wisperd, " I'm a lot older than what I look- know EXACTLY what to do." The surprized, and embarrased woman only nodded. 4

The sun was about to set.The villagers were either crying, wispering, listening, or looking around. Those things all showed how nervous they were. But, Ivorly only waited, giggling. Well, Ivorly KNEW this was nothing new. Most of the vampires raided human villages. Havoc between the chosen village was nothing new.Sceeches suddenly came echoing. Bats. Not too many of them. They were vampires in their bat forms. As soon as they got near the ground, they changed into their vampire forms. They had blood lust in ther purple eyes. That's what it was. When their eyes were purple- it meant bloodlust, hunger. Ivorly counted them mentally. Fiffteen to one. 5

There was seventeen villagers. A vampire with red hair lunged tward Ivorly. She took off her bracelet at the speed of lightning. Ivorly threw it at the vampire. It expanded, and went around his neck. He fell, struggled, and died. Hope was audible in the villagers. Ivorly giggled. The rest of the vampires looked down at the vampire- and then at Ivorly with rage. Seven of them came sprinting at a blinding speed. Ivorly took off her rose. She threw it at them. 6

Thorns as long, and sharp as knives ran into each of their hearts. The villagers got dead silent. Probably thinking that that bloody mess would be them- if not for Ivorly. Six turned into bats. They flew swiftly tward Ivorly- each at a differnt direction. Several villagers let out a cry of panic. Ivorly rung the rusty bell. Any noise wasn't audible to the villagers. 7

But, to the bats- it was a killer noise- literally. They fell, screeching, dead. Only one vampire aws left. He seemed to be the smartest. Panic rose among the villagers. After all, she had nothing left to use. the vampire had longish, black, hair, pale skin, and a black cloak over his thin, but a little muscular, boddy. Ivorly giggled loudly, breaking the silence. 8

The vampire looked at his dead brothers, friends, whoever they were. There was no emotion in his brown eyes. They were oddly not purple. " I am Zlerv...and YOU are? " He asked suddenly, surprizing the villagers. Ivorly giggled. She replied," Ivorly." " I wanted to get rid of my brothers- but YOU did that for me. " Zlerv said, strolling tward Ivorly. 9

Ivorly walked trward him. In a while, Ivorly was only about a foot away fron Zlerv. " Bite me. " Ivorly stated loudly. There was a wave of shock throughout the villagers. The vampire's eyes lit up purple.' Are you sure you want to...?" Zlerv asked hungrilly. Ivorly nodded. He grabbed her shoulders and bit into her neck. It was dark, and dead silent. It seemed even the babies stopped crying. Blood ran down Ivorly's long neck. She let out a quited moan. Zlefrv was drinking hungrilly. Then suddenly, his teeth felt like they wre breaking. He shoved Ivorly away- and noticed he had human teeht. " Whaaa??!!" He utterd, shocked. Ivorly's wound was gone,. too. A villager cried, " This is a cause for a celebration!!!!!" 10

Ivorly hopped around with the villagers that were dancing near the fire. Zlerv slitherd sneakily to her side. " What should I do now???!!" He demanded. " Protect the village." Ivorly managed through a giggle. Zlerv groaned. " Would you be here- too- I think I love you." Zlerv stated needily. " There are many other things for me to do" Ivorly replied. She kissed zlerv passionatly in the lips. And hopped into the welcoming darkness, giggling. " WAIT!!!!!!!" Zlerv cried. But it was too late, Ivorly was gone. 11

Author notes

This month is my B-day, too! ^_^ I LOOOOVE fantasy...... I always wanted to make the name Ivorly into a story character*

A contest entry

Is the story OK, and/or original?

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • elfflower1989
    August 9, 2008

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    Lol ok, the sequence was too fast and it didn't feel like you were drawing your readers in or showing them what happened. Rather, you listed off a bunch of events and threw in a little dialogue. Also, your grammar needs a little work, though it's not the worst I've never seen ^^

    Hmmm...

    I like the idea of the fairy being a guardian of a village, although that was a ridiculously tiny village. How does she expect the vampire to protect the village when she took away his powers? DID she take away his powers?

    This story might've been more interesting if she hadn't just laughed at all the problems and if perhaps fighting the vampires had been a little harder. Also, why the sudden love declaration at the end? He doesn't even know her! I think if you took the time to go through the events more slowly with more detail and explanation, this could become a great story.

    Good luck in my contest ^^


  • moonwriter
    May 1, 2008

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    This was good, but it wasn't all that interesting. It would be nice if you could do a little less dialoug and a little more description. While it's good that there's dialoug, it's not good that it's void of all description and imagery. Stories that have a good balance of both are the ones that are really impressive.

    Also, maybe you could put some spaces between the speaking stuff. Another thing was that there were points during the story where my mind was wandering off. An amazing story can hold my attention until the very end. I can't say that this did that.

    This story has a lot of potential and I can tell you're a good writer


  • EphemeralStyle
    April 28, 2008

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    Ivorly is an interesting character. Kind of chilling, the way she giggles at killing vampies Zlerv... I like that name; it's fun to say ^^

    What the...? She turned him into a human??? That does sort of blow my mind a bit. Ok, so vampires and such aren't particularly original concepts... but this was well-written nevertheless, and the story itself is unique. Goodluck in the contest!

    Eph


    • NinjaMegami
      April 29, 2008
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      Luvyas

      ........

    • NinjaMegami
      April 28, 2008
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      Luvyas

      Thank you. I wanted to make her odd. (Pssst, That was one of her powers...shhhhhh! ) I like the name "Zlerv," too! I tried to make it an intresting name. ^_~ Oh, and, thanks for the comment!!


  • Blackwings
    April 22, 2008

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    ^.^ this is a very imaginative piece ^.^ I liked this a lot ^.^ Nicely done and thank you for entering in my contest ^.^
    ♥ Blackwings

    • NinjaMegami
      April 23, 2008
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      Luvyas

      THANK YOU VERY much!!!!! I had some spelling errors... I tried to fix some... Thank you again! I NEVER get tired of a GOOD comment! *_^


  • Rose B Gray
    April 17, 2008

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    I think it's original. It could use a little polishing up though in my opinoin, but you're the author, so do as you like. I'll be happy to read more!

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