Alone. The girl's alone all the time... She always wanted a lover, someone to save her. She lay in her bed, in a quiet room. Silently sleeping with her journal beside her; a capless pen closed within her palm. She doesn't notice the man come in. He sits at the head of the bed gazing at the saddened lump of female. The blanket was tossed aside, exposing her naked body to the cool room. He raises his sweaty hand to trace her thigh lightly with his fingertips. She shivers and squirms, but her eyes do not open. He leans in and kisses between her thighs. She smiles, stretches her bare arms... then panicks when she opens her eyes to see a strange teen boy with his head in her lap. She gasps, and tries to push his head away. He looks up and smiles slyly.1
"Don't say a word," He whispers. "You'll enjoy it if you don't fight." He winks and moves his way up her soft body... He holds her arms down and kisses his way up her stomache, her chest, and stops at her cheek. 2
"Who are you? What are you planning?" The girl asks, with tears in her eyes. The guy just smiles and quiets her with a kiss. She gives in. He runs his hand down her breast. She wimpers, and pulls away. The boy laughs reaches his hand in his pocket to reveal a knife. The girl's eyes widen and she tries to bring the blanket to her chin, but she cannot move it. 3
"You like knives I see..." The man says in a low tone, eyeing the tallies on the girls trembling arms. A tear rolls down her reddened cheeks. She stares into his eyes, pleading with him. He looks down at the knife and then to the bare chest of the girl. He puts one hand on her mouth, kissing the back of his hand, and moving the other one to her naked breast. He places the icy metal blade to her skin. She winces as he puts more and more pressure on the knife. A small crimson droplet forms and slides down over the barbell in her nipple, down her stomach, and onto the fresh white sheets. She winces and bites her lip. He forces a kiss on her, and licks the small river of blood off of her nipples, then bites the fragile peircing. The girl tries to break free, but he is too strong. He pries her quaking legs apart, and climbs ontop of her. She arches her back as he slides inside. He smirks at the sight of her "enjoyment."4
The boy's powerful thrusts cause the girl to moan, pausing her sobs. She grips the pillows beneath her head and holds her breath as he lets loose within her. He slowly pulls out and gives the girl a kiss on the cheek. 5
"Pleasant dreams, hun," whispers the boy... The girl is panick-stricken. She doesn't move, she just gazes at the boy as he shrinks away with cat-like grace. He backs out of the door and closes it, leaving the girl bare and bleeding with her journal still beside her. An entry within her head that will never be revealed.6
Author notes
FINISHED!!!
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Oh wow! This is.. certainly different. You painted this out amazingly. I can picture it vividly, and I feel violated... I agree that the write could have been more sensual, but I don't think that was the point, was it? I like it this way. It leaves alot to the mind as well... Hmm... excellent write. Thanks for sharing!
~Amy
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Hahahahaaaaa!! This was so funny! It reminds me of something I did last week methinks...!
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well written
Nicely done. You have combined the erotic with the never ending teen joy of cutting. It was all well written.
John -
Thanks for the comment!! I'll read yours and change mine up a bit... i kept adding on, and when I finished, i wasn't as happy with it as I had hoped... thanks for the honesty!!!
Love,
Hill -
Good
I'd have to agree with Rose Dark Thorn, it was good, but could have stood to be more sensual. Granted, its hard to make rape sensual, but there are tricks to be used that would have dressed this piece up more. For instance, you focused a lot on her pain, maybe instead you could have mentioned the pain a little less as the main emotion, but as a precursor to pleasure. I didn't read this a some rape fetish story, but as a simple rape story without as much detail. hat would have made it erotic would have been to have her be raped but detail how as she fought she ENJOYED it. I hate to act all conceited, but I have a story that I wrote called "Daddy's Little Girl" that pretty much does what I'm talking about. And seeing as you have a rape fetish, you might even enjoy the read.
I enjoyed this a little, but would have enjoyed it more if you had written it just a tad differently. Good write! -
heh... yeah... i have a sort of rape fetish... heh... but I do have a thing for sensual experiences haha... so... that'll be my next one.. I'll let you know. haha... thanks for the comment.
Love,
Hill -
Very interesting story you have hear. It's erotic and dark at the same time, though I think I would've rathered something a little more sensual. It was still well written. Keep writing.
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*purrs* Excellent so far. A great read, very descriptive. Rape fantasies are so very fun...
~Amara
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