Walking through the thick, lush summer grass, I thought about the sleepover Jaylinn and I were planning for Wednesday. Talk, talk, talk. That's probably all that we would do. It's what we would usually do, no matter where we were. That's what makes us such great friends, besides the fact that we have a lot in common. We never run out of things to talk about. And even when we do get those silences, they're never awkward, like they are around almost everyone else. 1
Fighting back tears, I looked away from what I saw infront of me. Jake and April, holding hands and walking through the park, together. That word stung in my mind as i thought about it. There's nothing wrong with Jake or April, don't get me wrong. But it's just that they are always with each other, they have somebody. But I don't have anybody. And with the way things are going, I'm sure that I will never have someone to call my boyfriend. 2
I turned around and started walking the other way, going back to find Jaylinn at the public bathrooms. "Hey! Wait up!"
I didn't think the scream was meant for me, so I kept on walking. All of my friends were somewhere on vacation, unlike me. Jess was the only one of my friends that was still home, and this voice didn't sound like hers. 3
Strong, firm hands grabbed my shoulders and spun me around. "Hey. I was calling you. Playing hard to get?" 4
It was Jayson, my crush.5
Still in shock, I just nodded my head. I mean, it's not everyday that your crush grabs you by the shoulders in the park. "What, did I scare you? Because i'm sorry if I did. But I needed to talk to you."6
"What do you need to talk to me about?" I asked, recovering from shock. 7
"Uhh... Can we go sit on the bench?"8
"Sure."9
So we sat down. It felt really awkward. And I mean really awkward. Silence. More silence. Finally, he began to speak. "Well, uhh, do you remember all the times that we were partners together in a lot of classes last year?"10
"Yeaa. What about them?"11
"Well, I enjoyed spending that time with you. A lot. I really think that you're something special. And I hope that you feel the same way about me." He leaned in and gently brushed his lips on my cheek.12
"Yeaa, I do."13
And after that, we spent every day with each other, hanging out, talking, and just having a good time. 14
We would take long walks through the magnificent, green forests on weekends, and we would stay with each other during the week with each other to the latest hours. We never tired of each other, and we still don't. 15
Maybe we'll be together forever, and maybe we won't. BUt I sure hope that we do, because I sure love him a lot.I'll never forget this summer, and i'm sure that he won't, either.16
Author notes
I chose the summer option
A contest entry
- Summertime by beezy92.
225 points, ended May 18, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - maybe i'm in love(; by whatami.
249 points, ended May 26, 10 entries
Honorable winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - For Writers Fourteen Or Under by Andy Stephenson.
350 points, ended June 10, 28 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
tell me if u like it... ne comments r accepted
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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awwww... I thought this was really sweet and I loved it! Awesome job!
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hm.....
there was a few erorrs, though it twaz good!
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you scared me when the boy grabbed her. Nice tense moment.
Hi Danielle, thank you for entering the contest with this tale of young romance
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You had me fooled at the start, I really thought the unhappy emotions your character indulged in meant she was going to find life even crueler than she already did.
The run down of her relationships was a little hard to follow. You might want to clarify the fact that while Jaylinn is her closest friend, she does have others
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The manner in which you brought out the spark of jealously as she watched the young people holding hands was nicely shown.
And you scared me when the boy grabbed her. Nice tense moment. I’m glad he was only interested in talking to her.
The different spellings you use for common names like Jason and Jaylyn intrigues me, is there a reason?
Good story.
Geri
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I like it.
I did like this story, but it is very short and I felt like everything happens too quickly. More description and details would be nice. It was nice that it had a happy ending. Is this a true story or fiction?
This story was pretty well written and entertaining.
Thanks for entering 'For Writers Fourteen Or Under.
Andy
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I liked the ending, it was sweet and this story needed a sweet and sappy ending. I did feel like it went by too fast though. There wasn't much build up besides the one sentence of, "Oh, I'll never get a boyfriend." Explain that, develop that, expand on it. You had all the right ideas but it seemed like you were so excited to get to the end that you got there too soon.
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I love this story! It's really good. I can feel the emotion in the beginning, and I know what it feels like. I like the concept, she actually gets the guy...
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A little rushed in some parts, but overall the story turned out to be an easy, enjoyable read. It made me want to know more about the characters, and I'd love to hear more about Jake and April. Great job!
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This was good. You write like you know what to write. The plot was good. But I wish there was a bit more to this story. More descriptions, more insight to the characters. I love the ending line. Great job, and good luck.
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This was good. You write like you know what to write. The plot was good. But I wish there was a bit more to this story. More descriptions, more insight to the characters. I love the ending line. Great job, and good luck.
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This is an excerpt from something, isn't it? I'd like to see more backgroung on Jess and Jake and April and why she thinks she won't ever have anybody and why her reaction to them is so strong. I did like what I read though. (= Thanks for entering and good luck in the contest!
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uhh.. this isnt an excerpt... its sumthing i wrote by myself. but thxx for the tips!
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This is really sweet. I liked it, please write more as I would love to read more about this.
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wait a sec pantelis is ur bf now! silly u
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oooooooooo i like it!! why is pantelise's name in the title but not in the story? is there a 2nd chapter?
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