Wayne, a depressed, hazel brown weasel, hated life. He was through being taunted and tormented by his peers and his parents. He felt there was nowhere in the world for him. Nobody loved him, nobody cared for him, everyone was just putting him down, all the time. He was sick of it. Well, he'd show them.1
Wayne was trudging through the woods, wondering how to get his revenge on the ones who hated him. Suddenly, Wayne found a shiny thing that was in the ground, covered in what looked like tomato sauce. A fuzzy bear was next to the shiny thing. Wayne recognized him. He was the bear who went psycho with the shiny thing just a couple of days ago. Suddenly it popped into Wayne's mind. He could finally get his revenge.2
Drooling at the mouth, Wayne entered his house. His parents were not at all glad to see him. Wayne's mother whacked him across the head with a wooden spoon as soon as he entered the kitchen. Wayne just laughed. His mother was confused; usually Wayne would bawl his eyes out at a thing like this. She hit him again. More laughs. Again. More laughs. Wayne's mother didn't understand this. Suddenly, Wayne pulled out the shiny thing that was strapped to his back and sliced his mother's arm off, the one that held the wooden spoon. Ouch. Wayne then sliced her other arm off. Ouch! Wayne's mother was now crying and begging for mercy, but he didn't care anymore. Slice! Off with the legs. Wayne was enjoying this. He laughed at his mother one last time before he sliced her stomach open and decapitated her. Tomato sauce covered the floor like a pool. Just then Wayne's father came in to see what was going on. Wayne caught sight of him, and an evil little grin showed on his bloody, bruised weasel face.3
Wayne walked out of the house and dumped his parents' bodies in the waste basket. Just then, Wayne's worst bunch of bullies appeared from the next tree. Wayne just smiled and pulled out his shiny thing. The bullies stood in fear as Wayne quickly sliced open the ring leader's gut. Wayne laughed an evil laugh as he walked towards the frightened bullies. Slice! Slice, slice, slice! In a matter of seconds Wayne had mutilated the bullies. He felt happy for himself for once in 5 years. Wayne suddenly discovered that he couldn't stop his crazy killing spree. He gutted his grandma. He decapitated his drug dealer. He mutilated the mayor. He couldn't stop; it was so fun!4
Unfortunately Wayne made the unfortunate mistake of walking into the police station. He got shot to bits and thrown in the morgue.5
THE END
Author notes
I got a bit carried away with this one.
(contest note: name)
RegalTheft
(contest note)
Runner-Fox
--RT
In a list
A contest entry
- Come on in... by NightTime-Fox.
150 points, ended June 11, 2008, 8 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Vindication by Oblivion Kitty God.
1000 points, ended June 9, 2008, 2 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - ...Rotten... by Toxic Paradox.
1050 points, ended June 17, 2008, 15 entries
Honorable winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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ROfl I love ur little killing series
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hehehe killing is fun Go the weasel
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Assertive, to-the-point beginning. I like that.
A bear that went psycho with the shiny thing? Oh dear. He sounds like a nasty piece of work.
This is possibly the funniest rottenness I've read so far - much more light-hearted in a murderous revenge sort of way. While this is by no means a polished, suspenseful piece of writing exploring the darkest, deepest side of human nature or animalistic tendencies, I still found it pretty damn rotten. And your spelling and grammar are decent enough which pleases me.
Like I said, not completely polished: some of the sentences could do with a re-draft but all in all I liked it. I couldn't decide if Wayne or his parents were the bigger rotters. -
It's.... odd. To say the least. I'll have to look at the first part to understand what the "shiny thing" is. Still, it was well written. Though the vindication in the end is almost anticlimatic, really. Thanks for entering the contest.
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Good... But I would have liked it more if it was more complete. It was good but it seems like you could add more to the story.
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Hilarious, mate. I like this - spontaneous, and funny, and the way you decribed the killings - I know that was horrific, but the way in which you related them just made me grin.
The ending was a bit sudden - and served the little weasel right!
Maybe the next one, you could write about an elephant ...
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Well,
Your weasel and bear are very similar in their psychosis. They go around spilling tomato sauce wherever they go. Don't know what happened to your bear, but the weasel died at the hands of the police. This shiny object seems to cause your psycho animals to lose it.
Andy
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*shudders* this is really well written RT. Kind of creeped me out. This would have done good in my horror stories contest. lol. a bit funny, but also creepy.
Keep penning buddy. ^_^
Ice
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I vote for platypus for originality.
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Not so much gore pleassse
Scary and gory. yuk but good story -
Animals Voted So Far
1 duck
1 pig
1 gorilla/King Kong
1 platypus
1 dolphin
When I get more than 3 votes for one animal, I'll include it in the story.
--RT -
... i say again scary... how about a... pig!! lol
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I am sorry to being a big fan of your stories i am really disappointed with this one. It wasn't laughable at all like the bear. It was really...... stupid and sick. Anyways my vote will be a King Kong and make it good!
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LOL Physco weasels now that is a unique story! Brilliant write
You write some crazy things and I love them. Hmmm another animal lets see hmmm maybe a duck lol
~Joann
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I don't think this works nearly as well as the last one because you don't have that disparity between what the character thinks he's doing and what he's actually doing. That was pretty much what your whole comedic effect came from in the last one. Frankly, this one really isn't funny at all.
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Yeah. Well, I didn't want this weasel to be as stupid and childish as the bear so I made him sort of an emo dude. That's why it's not very funny. I'll try harder with the next one.
--RT -
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Then maybe for comedic effect you could have your emo weasel whining about how much he's hurting inside as he saws people apart, thus pointing out his ego-centric hypocrisy.
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I see what you're saying. Uh, what does ego-centric hypocrisy mean?
--RT -
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Ego-Centric - he only cares about himself
Hypocrisy - he whines about his pain while causing pain to others -
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I see. Cheers for the help.
--RT
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cccccccccccoooooooooooooolllllllllllll
i would like to see a dolphin to get the shiny thing!
see you coolie.! -
Hehehe.... fun times with Tomato Sauce!
I vote for a .... Platypus!! YAY
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