Shadowlands: 11 playin with the queen of hearts

I lay motionless in the grass for quite some time. My nose and mouth were full of blood, and my crushed ribs were making breathing difficult.1

After an eternity the sun gave up on baking me, and went down. The moon rocketed up to the its place in the sky and resume its usual regiment of glaring angrily at me.2

I listened to the breeze in my ears, waiting, hoping almost, for death. The pain in my body had been thundering around my nerves long enough to make me numb.3

I heard voices. I was losing my mind. They got louder. Footsteps joined in their chorus. "I'm telling you it's been tea time long enough, have a talk with time and see if he'll stop stopping."4

"He just won't be reasonable, he won't even give me a chance to do the dishes. I've buttered everything from my hat to my bread, and a few shoes in between, and he won't let it end. More scone?"5

"Thank you."6

"He just needs to realize that I didn't mean to jam my pocket watch. It was all just a mistake."7

The pair got close enough that I could see them. A man in a tophat, and a hare in coattails. "What's this?" asked the hare.8

"Looks like an outsider. Wonder what he's doing here."9

"Oh oh, maybe he's being punished, they usually send the miscreants out alone to get killed. We could get a hefty reward for this one," the hare said excitedly, stroking his right ear straight. It stood upright for a moment before flopping down into his face again.10

"Dormouse, would you just appraise this man for us?" requested the hatter.11

A small brown furry creature shuffled up to me. It looked a bit like a mouse made from an oversized football, and a yard too much fur. He wiped the sleep from his eyes and looked at me critically. "Decent condition. You'll have to clean him up first if you want a good price for him though, and with your watch jammed you'll never have time for that."12

"Say!" exclaimed the hare, "I've got an idea! You jammed your watch, what do you do when you jam your face?"13

"Why I just wipe it off with toast of course, what else would I do?" the man replied, his face became dopey with confusion. In order to scratch his head, he momentarily used the mouse as a hat rack.14

"Well," began the hare again, "What if you toasted the watch the way you toast your face!"15

The doormouse took the opportunity to interrupt, "Ah-heh-hem. We haven't any bread." He then fell asleep against my shoulder.16

"Stupid mouse, what he doesn't realize is that all you need to make toast is plenty of drink. A cup of tea all around. Hatter, raise your glass and speak."17

As the man -who i was coming to recognize- started speaking, a small orange imp crept up to the sleeping dormouse. Quietly he slaughtered and skinned the animal. He pulled the scalp over his head like a cheap blood soaked hat.18

He winked at me as he poured flames out over the body. The consoling gesture was lost somewhere between delerium, pain, and fear.19

"... and so, without further ado, to you, good watch, I give you, my toast." They drank, threw their cups into the fire, and turned to the 'dormouse'. "There, now that we have all the time in the world, just what do we need to do for him dormouse?"20

The disguised imp rubbed his oversizzed nose, putting scratch marks in his leathery skin. He looked up at the man and beckoned for him to follow.21

They walked over a small hill, completely out of sight. The night sky lit up with blinding fire, and the imp came back with the tophat on over the fur.22

"Hatter, you look different," said the hare, "You want me to turn away for a minute? Okay, if you say so..."23

The imp put his hand in the small of the hare's back, and there was another flash. The hare was gone. Where he stood was a rapidly dissapating cloud of pink.24

The smell of singed fur filled the air, accompanied by grass fire, and burnt coney.25

The little imp went to the end of my chain, and started dragging me along. Oh here it comes, thought I, I finally get to die.26

But I didn't die.27

He dragged me through a hedge maze of white roses. They grew in thick brambles with razor sharp thorns. Spaded workers ran around frantically, trying to paint the last few roses red. Two men watched the work, and discussed while a woman stood behind them with a clip board, taking down notes. One man had a Q on his shoulder, and was rather... fashionable. The other man looked like a contractor, he wore a K on his shoulder. The woman with the clip board was dressed in a plain business suit, and had a J pendant haning from her neck.28

The imp dragged me up the stairs of a domino castle. Each domino was a huge stone slab with red hearts carved into the faces. I was going in and out of delirium, taking most of my time to reflect on how often I was beaten to the brink of death these days.29

Being dragged up a set of stone stairs is pretty painful. I enjoyed the thoughts of what I could do to the imp if I were in a better position, and it kept my inner murder appeased.30

As we rounded a corner, I cought a glimpse of the blood trail i was leaving. How did this little devil not raise an alarm?31

He dragged me to the dungeons, into a room with a checkered floor. Four shrines had been erected, one in each corner.32

The first shrine was a large spade, resting in an enormous furnace. The adjacent corner housed a large club, driven into the ground hard enough to send fractures up the wall, and knock down some of the ceiling. Next to that was a diamond, floating in a cyclonic updraft. 33

And in the last corner, which I was moving to, a heart floated over a pool of water. The imp pushed me into the pool. The dull pain in my body became sharp once more, as my bones forced and fused back together. After letting me writhe in the water for a minute, the imp pulled me back out.34

He pulled me onto my knees, and i saw the name on his spiked collar. "Thanks Vix."35

I stood up and wobbled to the center of the room. "What is this place?" I asked him.36

He shook his head and led me up a staircase.37

We came to a T and Vix pulled me back. I was about to protest when a Crusher plodded past in the adjacent hallway. The imp pulled my pant leg and led me down the corridor the Crusher had come from.38

A gaggle of odd looking people moved down the hallway ahead of us. The most notable member of the group wore an alb and a tall headdress. A single K stood out on either shoulder, and the rest of his clothes were covered in red diamonds.39

He was flanked by Five, and Ten. Five looked like a crazy jester, and Ten looked like the king with less decoration, and no funny hat.40

Behind the two numbered men walked the Jack, who looked remeniscent of the white wizard. A cloud of little diamonds followed him.41

The imp led me down a side hall, and up another flight of stairs. Little checkers guarded the doorways in the next hall. Most of them ignored us, but the occasional crowned piece got a little ballsy and received an immediate nuking from the imp. He seemed like some sort of lesser Oni, straight up goblin looking. His large pointed ears made him look a little comical as he bobbed down the hallway.42

He stopped in front of a decorated doorway, and pushed. He looked up at me and tapped it with his finger. I pushed and the door slowly ground open.43

The imp led me out onto a balcony overlooking the whole deck of cards, minus the hearts. The clubs were arranged around the room keeping watch over the spades and diamonds.44

The king of clubs looked like the other clubs only bigger, about the size of the Crusher avatar I fought in the arena. The queen stood on his left shoulder, watching the room like a foreman. she was wearing a leather suit, and kept flicking a long whip into the air. The blackjack was a tall muscular man with a billy club in his hand and a derringer in his belt. He looked like someone Sherlock Holmes would brawl with.45

The diamonds finished finding their places. They looked like a grab mix of scolars, both religious and mystic.46

Sitting across the room from them were the spades. All thirteen of them were looking around nervously. They looked like they were expecting to be executed.47

I looked down at the imp, "Vix, where are the hearts?"48

He pointed to the ceiling. Nine lanterns made from skulls lined the dome of the room. On either end a body hung limp by its neck, and over the throne the ace of hearts hung upside down from a burning cross.49

The queen of hearts entered the room, pulling Alice along by the hair. She sat in her throne, and retorically asked, "Shall we begin?"