Beating the Bush: A Short Biography1
George W Bush is a name that no one is going to forget in a while especially people living in Iraq and Afghanistan. They say George W Bush had loved discovering things, this can be proved by his determination to find weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.2
About GW Bush, well Bush from the start was unique, originality was his motto. In elementary school while other kids collected things like stamps and butterflies, Bush used to collect oil. He had a chamber in which he had every type of oil, from different companies but his main focus the more amount of oil he can assemble.3
Bush always looked up to his father, from a very young age his father would stand on the roof of the house and from the lawn Bush would look up to his father.4
EAS’s official Interview with Bin Laden5
Gm: Osama, how are you?6
B Laden: Alhamdulillah, I am fine.7
Gm: Osama, what are your feelings towards Bush?8
Osama: Bush is a genuine man, who is sincerely working for his own gain.9
Gm: Osama, do you think, you can still really beat Bush.10
Osama: But my friend I and my Muslim brothers beat bush after every prayer, which means five times a day.11
Gm: How exactly?12
Osama: Well usually we take a stick and start beating the first Bush we see with the stick.13
Gm: Right, thank you Osama.14
End Interview15
Bush proved his resilience and skills many time after he became the President of the United States. In America’s troubled time Bush was firm, we need to look no further, it was perhaps America biggest test when 9/11 occurred, there was fear everywhere but Bush was firm.16
When Bush heard about 9/11 he was reading his favorite book, “my pet goat”17
The official came and told Bush that a plane has just hit the twin towers, Bush showed extraordinary calmness, determination the world has ever seen, he just read on.
But once finished, he was angry really angry,18
Start Dialogue19
Bush: I just know its Iraq I just know it’s Saddam, damn it who else could it be?20
Rice: You should solve it with true sprit of democracy.21
Bush: How?22
Rice: Take pieces of paper, write down the names of all the Islamic countries, put them in a box, shuffle thoroughly and then take out one.23
End Dialogue24
And through Bush’s extraordinary leadership skills a great problem was solved, all of America’s troubles were resolved and those of Afghanistan started.25
But then Bush discovered that there was no oil in Afghanistan, he was disappointed and then he went to Iraq, there he found oil, killed millions and now he was happy.26
Bush’s Interview27
Shah: Sir, first Afghanistan then Iraq, who’s next?28
Bush: Well it’s simple, Iran.29
Shah: What else do you plan in near future?30
Bush: I plan to find a way for John McCain to win.31
Shah: How do plan to do that?32
Bush: By attacking Pakistan.33
Shah: How exactly is that going to help?34
Bush: Pakistan had the secret that can be used to beat Hilary
Clinton and Barrack Obama.35
Shah: How do you know that it’s there?36
Bush: The same way I knew about weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.37
Shah: Is it true that the reason for attack for Iraq was oil?38
Bush: No I did it to help America become a better state?39
Shah: How exactly was attacking Iraq going to help?40
Bush: Well I didn’t think about that part.41
Shah: Right, what do you have to say about Kosovo’s independence?
Bush: Kosovo’s got independent, how?42
Shah: What do you mean how, it just did.43
Bush: But I didn't attack it yet.44
Shah: Right, one last question. They say John Ma Cain doesn’t stand a chance and I think attacking Pakistan isn’t going to help either. 45
What do you have to say about this?46
Bush: If nothing worked we will pay Britney Spears to support Obama and Clinton which will guarantee a win for McCain.47
Shah: Thank you.48
End Interview49
Well there will be no need to beat the Bush in these elections, one thing for sure.50
THANK GOD!51
Let Use this moment to give Bush a very special award, it’s called “Stop it already”Award52
Guys Clap!53
Well that it’s from Team of EAS, let finish this with a verse on Bush by Wali.54
“Some will vests others will wash Baggers, whatever Bushy says that’s what gonna happen” Wali.55
56
Author notes
Alright, so it okay. Hurray! Anyways Credits:
To Gm of EAS and to Wali of EAS
Fav Ice Cream: Pineapple
- The EAS Community group list • next in list
A contest entry
- Parodies and Satire by tallblondie.
550 points, ended March 31, 8 entries
Honorable winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Get out your funny pants!! Humor contest. by RxxSpiritWolfxxJ.
350 points, ended April 23, 14 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Ha Ha! Humor! by Katty.
190 points, ended April 30, 16 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - May Whichcraft Contest by whichcraft.
175 points, ended May 23, 15 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Anything goes by Vampiric souls.
175 points, ended May 17, 16 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Comedy by GuitarShank.
350 points, ended June 11, 14 entries
Honorable winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Do you like it?
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
-
Hurray for satire
I'm no political person, and I don't want Hillary or Obama to win, but I like this
Good jorb
Thanks for entering
-
There are two things I have to say, I one who doesn't come from America and doesn't really care about politics actually found this interesting and funny. great job..
-
I found your writing piece a little obscure but interesting. I wasn't sure where you were going with it until I realized the story ended in an interview type story. Thank you for entering and good luck.
-
Great! I had a similar entry like this, but you used different people, which I admired greatly. Thank for entering my contest and good luck!
*KAT* -
Nice...but I have to ask, have you read my Interview with Bush?? Because it's the same thing, but with actual quotes.
-
Now I am suppose to make satire look serious with agenda. It hass no agenda while it still make a point that why it's a satire.
-
This is funny. I'm always up for a good Bush satire The format was a little confusing but it was still good. I like it (+
-
Interesting
As imaginitive as it is, I don't really understand. You're using fictitious stories and interviews to show that Bush is bad/idiotic/mean/whatever. But none of these things has happened. It's like if I hated lions because they eat deer...but I wrote a story saying that lions stole street signs and whacked people in the head with them. Sure, I hate lions, but I have no grounds to state what I have stated about them. I guess if you meant this story as ONLY a story with no agenda behind it, it's a nice piece of art. However, if you intended to prove a point about Bush, it's inappropriate. -
I have to say, I was very offended by this. This story made Bush out to be an idiot who has no care for the people in the USA. Bush cares for the people, and I hate to say it but like many of us, we tend to look at the bad instead of the good.
As I said before, I was offended... I don't really think this story is written respectivly.
But as I say, "To each his own"
You have the freedom to write what you want to write. : )
All I can say is, thank you for not making it any more offending than it already is... in fact I am forced to see "some" humor in this story. : )
-
Haha, this is very funny to those who love bashing Bush. One punctuation error: "When Bush heard about 9/11 he was reading his favorite book, "my pet goat"
First of all, the title should be capitalized. Also, ou need a period.
"The official came and told Bush that a plane has just hit the twin towers, Bush showed extraordinary calmness, determination the world has ever seen, he just read on.
But once finished, he was angry really angry," What does the last sentence mean? Also, is something missing after "Bush showed extraordinary calmness"?
"Bush: No I did it to help America become a better state?" <- should that be a period?
"They say John Ma Cain" Maybe you should delete the space?
This is really funny, and I can't wait to read more!
-
Excellent farcical examination of 'dubbya' - I could just see one of these transcripts being written and aired on something like Letterman. Funny, without being irreverent, and nicely written.
-
wow! this was a funny piece.Unique way of writing.Something different.I cant stop laughing.It is a mockery piece,but the way you wrote it is like..i dunno how to descibe it like you are naive or something like that..But it's a good piece!
-
An interesting write here. Humorous and enjoyable.
I also thought that it could have been a little longer... there are a lot of things you could talk about when you start on george bush!
anyway, no real errors... a good write overall.
The picture is a great touch, haha. -
Thank you for your comment on my story Sunset Goes Home. It's the last of a trilogy. It reads better if you've read the other two before (The Centauress and A Time for Us).
I agree with your political satire above.
Let's see what happens next.
Sincerely,
Anaya Roma
-
I agree with Hermanator 1, this is a good satire. You probably could have made it longer, after all he's been there for a long time.
Even though I'm not American, I can enjoy the humour in this. It's well written. You should sharpen your pencil for the Presidential Election Circus. I can't wait to read that one!
Lis
-
well that exactly hwat i meant when i reffered it him standing on the roof and all
-
Thank from your American Friend
The only error in your piece was that George junior did not look up to his father enough. In the first predident Bush's book he said that america could NOT invade Iraq because once in, there would be no way out. His stupid son did it anyway.
Good satire! I will send it on to other Americans to help them think!
Adding your comment:
1 - 17 of 17
