The cold clung to the suburban landscape like a fleece soaked in water. The harsh winter was palpable in the lungs and the fingers. Slight atrophy began to build up in the limbs of the few people who still wandered the night. It was no different in the recesses of the George Addler Memorial Park. The lamp posts illuminated most of the sidewalk and filled the area with an ominous yellow glow. Perched on a park bench near a particularly eerie street light sat a man in a black trench coat.1
He was in his late twenties or early thirties with a rather slim build, and long, thin fingers. His hair was a mop of auburn atop his head and his face was marred with scabs and scars. The latter was a nasty side-effect from his unfortunate methamphetamine addiction. And that of coarse was the reason why this man was sitting on a park bench in the middle of winter.2
A sudden tremor shook the man in his seat and he folded into himself to suppress the spasms. It had been a full three days since he had used last and his withdrawal symptoms had become steadily worse. Now he suffered from acute momentary spasms and a painful paralysis that made holding objects of any kind quite difficult. Although, he was fairly sure that some of it was psychosomatic.3
He glanced down at his watch. It read a quarter till one. The man pulled a pack of cigarettes from his coat and finally managed to light one. Nicotine was a poor substitute for meth but for now it would have to do. He took another drag and let the miasma of tobacco enter his lungs. He was beginning to get impatient and quite irritable.4
He was just about to leave and look elsewhere for his deadly vice, when suddenly a chill ran through him and made him stand up straight. The wind began to flurry all around him and toss the dead leaves about like a vacuum. The street lights began to crack and shatter all around him. He turned around in time to see a light descend from the sky and land in the middle of the park about thirty yards away from him. The cigarette had fallen from his mouth and he extinguished it with his heel.5
Abandoning all his reason the man broke into a dead run toward the center of the park. His lungs were on fire and his legs were like jelly but something inside of him compelled him to pursue the light. "Well Alex," he said to himself. "no rest for the wicked."
6
The landscape was rough and unforgiving as Alex ran across the park. Trees obstructed his vision and left lacerations on his face like those of a scourge. The ground was rife with rocks and various other obstructions that caused him to trip and loose his balance. But he ignored all these and continued his pursuit in a headstrong fashion that surprised him. He had been impulsive some times and wholly irrational most of the time but he had never possessed such avid determination before. It was as if somehow his destiny, his entire future was bound to that mysterious light and whomever or whatever had caused it.7
He was near the center of the park now and even though his eyes had not fully adjusted to the darkness he could see the distinct outline of the gazebo that marked the parks center. The light still glowed briefly from within and Alex crouched down in some bushes not ten feet away to steal a glance. And what he saw would mark the beginning and the end of the man known as Alex.8
The figure closest to him was human, or at least having similar enough features to look like a human. The man(or so he juxtaposed) was about eight feet tall with large strong arms the size of tree trunks. He had a large broad face with a protruding chin and eyes that glowed even in the pitch black of the park. He wore only a set of torn black trousers to cover himself and the rest of him was entirely bare including his chest which was marred with all manor of scar and scratch. His hair was long and white reaching almost to his waist and upon his back a long, thin dragon was tattooed in glowing red ink.9
The other creature however was even stranger by comparison. Alex observed her briefly as she stepped forth from the shadow of a nearby tree and approached the first figure. She had many feminine features but that was were her humanity ended. She was about average height with a slightly manic demeanor, and and a luxurious allotment of rich, black hair. She was very slender, however she was endowed with alluring curves that only enhanced her feminine wiles. To say that Alex was not attracted to her would be a lie. She wore a black and red corset that bowed to her masochistic tastes, a pair of long black gloves, and a pair of tight fitting leather trousers that painted her as the very picture of lust. What separated her from any ordinary being however was the pair of large bat-like wings that protruded from her shoulders and were now folded upon her back.10
Alex sat marveling over what he was seeing and at the same time trying not to betray his position with so much as a sneeze. He listened intently as the figures began to speak. "Good evening Veyaro!" the she devil crooned. "To what do I owe this untimely assembly. If you desired to be alone with me all you had to do was ask." "Hold your tongue Devana; we have no time for your laughable jests. We have important matters to discuss." Devana giggled with pleasure and rubbed both her shoulders slowly in a sensual manner. "Oh harsh harsh and raw! I love that in a man Veyaro! Don't tease me so." Veyaro rolled his eyes looking rater annoyed yet board at the same time. "The time is almost complete Devana; soon Areth will arise and the time of man will be over!" 11
"Areth? Why do we need that fossil when we are perfectly fit to do everything ourselves." He slammed his fist against the side of the structure and it swayed violently. "You speak blasphemy woman! Have you forgotten your creed, your covenant, your code? We swore allegiance to Areth not because of his strength or charisma but because it was he who showed us the way at the cost of his own life! Without Areth we would still be slaves of the old society which would hold us under its boot and force us into captivity!" Devana shrugged. "No Veyaro, I have not forgotten my code, nor have I forgotten the oath I swore never to serve under another. I have lived through that before and will not do so again." "You will not have to, Areth promised we would serve with him, not for him, and I for one will..." At that moment Alex was afflicted with another spasm that shook him to his core and caused the bushes around him to rustle.12
"What was that?" Devana inquired. Veyaro chuckled. "Methinks there is a spy amongst the underbrush. Veyaro lunged and in an instant he returned with Alex kicking and screaming in his arms. "Well, well, well." Devana mused. "It seems we have caught a little man. May I keep him Vayaro, oh pretty please?" Veyaro grinned malevolently. "So this was the spy amongst us? What a pleasant surprise!" Devana grabbed Alex by the shoulders and cradled him in her arms. "Oh mortal men are so frail, yet so deliciously intoxicating." With that she bent over his face, extended her abnormally long tongue, and drew is slowly across his cheek. Alex quavered in her arms like a beached fish. "Stay away from that one Devana he is tainted with narcotics, I can smell them from here. What a perfect waist of a meal!" Devana caressed Alex's face with her finger. "So he is! His face is marred with more scars than a werewolf in a fire fight. You wonderful self-destructive man; it seems we share a common soul!" She clasped his head in the vice of her two hands and kissed him in a most aggressive manor. Alex felt queasy as her tongue swam around in his mouth for a few moments, then withdrew as she loosened her grip. His skin began to burn and his face felt like it had been covered in acid.13
"I have no intention of feeding on this poor soul Vayaro, I simply wish to Turn him." Vayaro smiled. "Now allow me, you turned the last human we came in contact with. I usually allow you your vices, but for once you must indulge mine!" "Very well." Devana responded. Then she knelt over Alex and whispered in his ear. "We will meet again." Then Vayaro grabbed Alex by the skull and hoisted him in the air. "Little man know this!" he said. "Tonight I will give you new life, do with it as you please. Forget your name it no longer applies. You are now Vain for you are a child of Vayaro." And with that Vayaro sunk the talons of his right hand into Alex's chest. A putrid black liquid ran from Vayaro's hand into Alex. The stench was over powering and Alex could barely breath. His chest burned like hellfire and his heart felt like it would burst out of his chest. He clawed at his attackers hands trying to get free but is was no use; he was slowly suffocating. He kicked his legs and flailed his arms and then it was over. Alex when limp and Vayaro discarded him in the bushes. His vision became blurred and his ears rang with the pulse of his blood. And then blackness overcame him and he was dead.14
Author notes
This is my first attempt at anyting even remotely resembling a pot line. Please tell me what you think. I have the next few chapters on standby.
In a list
A contest entry
- Good Stories Wanted by Kat222.
650 points, ended March 4, 2008, 16 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Fantasy - Fiction - Prologues by Prodigious.Mirth.
350 points, ended April 28, 2008, 6 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
What does my writing lack?
Comments
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Wow this was good. But I think you might need to take a look at the structure of the last part. Every time someone talks it should be on a new line. And paragraphs are essential to make things easier.
But it was very good and I liked the descriptions at the beginning. All in all it was very effective and I shall go and read more.
Angel
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This would have been much easier to read if it was broken up, and yet still it had the nice elements I like in it... try breaking it up for others... you did a well and fine job with this first...I take it is a first peice ..yess ^.^
GOOD LUCK
THANKS FOR ENTERING
P.M
~Blair~
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ooooo! Very thought provoking. You used beautiful words and phrases and the descriptions of the characters were captivating!
I did notice a typo, but only one. The line: Veyaro rolled his eyes looking rater annoyed yet board at the same time.
I think what you meant to say was: Veyaro rolled his eyes looking rater annoyed yet BORED at the same time.
This is a great story. Keep writing it! I want to know what happens next!
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THis was very good! great description. you captured the characters well, for lack of a better way of saying it. There are a few spelling mistakes. but the gramer was terrific! i would actually like to read more. Good luck in the contest!
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