My Interview

An interview with myself...1

'I' will equate interviewer2

'TFO' will equate TheFlawedOne.3

I: Today is January 14th the time is 12:06 P.M. PST.4

TFO: And...your point would be?5

I: Sorry Flawed, I just have to acknowledge these things.6

{At this point in the interview TFO sits back crosses her legs and smiles what I can only describe as an 'eat shit and die' grin7

I: Okay Flawed, What's your true name.8

TFO: Oh, my dear friend, you should know better than to ask such a question.9

I: Okay, then...When's your birthday?10

TFO: March 10th, 196711

I: So...that makes you...uh...{counts fingers} 36 correct?12

TFO: Ah, proof that apes can count!  Yes, I am 36 what of it?13

I: Nothing nothing at all...do you think maybe, your attitude might set you off from other people?14

TFO: Well, one can only hope can they not?15

I: Uh...yeah.16

TFO: Next question?  I'm growing quite bored of you already.17

I: OK...let's see.  Who inspires you to write these dark and evil poems you have been putting out lately.18

{At this point in our interview TFO brings out a bone of some sort and starts picking her teeth with it~I try to look away but it looks so human it's scary}19

TFO: I am glad that my poetry delights you.20

I: I didn't say I was delighted, I asked who inspires such work.  To read of games I played as a child turned deadly, well, quite frankly it is a little creepy.21

TFO: Okay okay...I would have to say my inspiration has come from a few different areas.  One would be, when I was a child I wasn't included with the other children I was always picked last to play games, and then I was told just to sit aside and let them win.  So I say now to any playground bullies, you better be nice or....22

Another inspiration would be, of course, my literal God, Edgar Allen Poe.   Also when I write these works I listen to Enimen, therefore I can only write them when my son is at school...because well~even I have values.23

I: Ah, yes the son...It's been rumored that you tend to dote on your son very much and spoil him.  Is there any truth to that?24

TFO: That is a viscous rumor started by my therapist, I think its false in it's entirety.25

I: Yes, she did mention it when I interviewed her for some background.   But, I must say that your teenaged children say the same thing.26

TFO: Yes, well I would understand how they would think that.  He does have many advantages that the other children did not have.27

I: Well...if you don't mind me asking why is that?28

TFO: Because, since you must know, I wasn't the same person I am now back then, I've grown up immensely and now am working on creating a healthy and loving relationship with all my children and I strive to treat them all equally.29

I: Okay...Lets see.. Love life yea or nay?30

TFO: Very much yea!  One man inspires any of my love poetry but I will not speak of him here in this forum.  Move on or get out.31

I: Are you sure you have a relationship...you just seem so uh...cranky?32

TFO: MOVE ON...33

I:  Okay okay...Now, getting back to the therapist issue...I read in your files that you are bipolar?  How's that working for ya?34

TFO: How does it work for me???  Let me wrap my hand around your neck and see how that works for you!35

{At this point TFO becomes quite cranky and starts to fidget.  I must say that TFO is always in constant movement.  I haven't seen her sit still before this interview began.}36

I: Okay...lets see getting back to the poetry for a moment...Are you happy with your work?  Do you think you've reached your limit?37

TFO: Happy?  Short answer: no.  I feel I must always strive to improve my work.  I recently started reading more classics and some modern works as well.  I find poetry that inspires me and I strive to surpass it.  Which is why you'll never find me writing ... hmm ... let's say like Shakespeare I do have limits and I acknowledge them.  My goal is to surpass Poe in the type of horror poetry I achieve.  I must achieve greatness with all my endeavors.38

I: I see...At this time do you have any projects in the works?39

TFO: Well, being who I am I always have something in the works.  At this time I think its safe to say I have about 500 poems either in my mind or on my computer or in one of my many notebooks in the works.  Most will never be completed or worked on ever again.40

I: Why is that?  I think your fans would like to read them.41

TFO: One thing I must say never ever call my readers fans.  They are not fans, they are my friends, my inspiration, my family the reason for my existence as a poet.  Do not insult them by calling them " fans."42

{During this statement TFO stares directly into my eyes, no...dare I say in to my soul.  I feel the need to apologize for calling her readers 'fans'}43

I: Okay point taken.  I am sorry for that.   Lets see I have just a few more questions of you.  One is what are your goals for your poetry?44

TFO: My goals are simple...I want to continue in this latest series and I want to write some children's poetry.45

I: Uh..yeah that's quite a contrast isn't it?46

TFO: Damn, you don't think I can be either dark or happy at all times.  I swing and therefore my writing does as well.47

I: Okay I can see that.  Next question...what are your goals in general.48

TFO: Oh...I have so many goals, things I want to try.  I want to dabble in painting.  Just colors, I don't have any hope for success.  I just want to try that next.  Also I intend on taking a creative writing and child psychology classes.  That and some women's studies.   Yes, that would please me.  As well as that, I am planning on going back to church.  Oh close your mouth!  It's not that shocking!  And of course I am in ever constant motion in working on my relationship with family, friends and of course my personal relationship.  As well as my relationship with myself.49

I: OK...I think that's all any thing else?50

TFO: Yes...read my works!!!!!!!!!51