Cliché of Love

 1

2

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: center" 3

align=center>Cliché of Love4

5

face="Times New Roman"> 6

7

face="Times New Roman">“LOVE - what is love?8

style="mso-spacerun: yes">  A great and aching heart;9

10

face="Times New Roman">Wrung hands; and silence; and a long despair.11

12

face="Times New Roman">Life - what is life?13

style="mso-spacerun: yes">  Upon a moorland bare14

15

face="Times New Roman">To see love coming and see love depart.”16

17

face="Times New Roman">(Robert Louis Stevenson, “Love, What Is Love”)18

19

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">20

face="Times New Roman">Love is a word 21

that always made me think of a Disney fairy tale, a prince searching for the 22

love of his life and the princess waiting to be rescued from an evil creature. 23

Somehow they meet each other, the prince falls 24

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">in love with the princess and plays on 25

his life to rescue his beloved and in the end they get married and live happily 26

ever after. During the last eighteen years of my life, this was my definition of 27

true love; but recently I realized there is more to it than just dreaming and 28

waiting for a Prince Charming to come and rescue you from (hypothetically 29

speaking) your evil family.30

31

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">32

face="Times New Roman">To know the meaning of 33

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">love we need to look at its definition, 34

love n¹ is 35

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">“that disposition or state of feeling with 36

regard to a person which (arising from recognition of attractive qualities, from 37

instincts of natural relationship, or from sympathy) manifests itself in 38

solicitude for the welfare of the object, and usually also in delight in his or 39

her presence and desire for his or her approval; warm affection, attachment… 40

devotion” (Oxford English Dictionary). 41

face="Times New Roman">There are more than sixteen definitions of love in Oxford 42

English Dictionary, from which it is obvious that love is always around us just 43

in different forms and in different natures. 44

45

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">46

face="Times New Roman">We experience love from the day we are born till our 47

dying day. Every aspect of our life is filled with this feeling that has been 48

claimed as the most abstract aspect of life.49

style="mso-spacerun: yes">  However, in reality love is nothing but 50

a mystique story that is all that a human may share. Love is just a placeholder 51

for a choice we make rather than feelings. It’s the intention behind it that 52

gives it meaning. Love by itself is nothing; maybe because of the over-use of 53

this term, it has lost its true meaning.54

55

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">56

face="Times New Roman">The interpretation of love changes in every context; 57

depending on how the person has used it. The word love goes back to the very 58

roots of the English language. Old English 59

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">lufu is related to Old Frisian 60

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">luve, Old High German 61

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">luba, Gothic 62

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">lubo. There is a cognate, 63

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">lof, in early forms of the Scandinavian 64

languages. The Indo-European root is also behind Latin 65

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">lubet 'it is pleasing' and 66

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">lubido 'desire'. The word is recorded 67

from the earliest English writings in the 8th century (The Oxford Explanation of 68

Word Origins). “To keep the original meaning of love it really needs to be saved 69

for out of the ordinary, important things and people really cherish; how can one 70

equate- ‘I really love my husband’ with ‘I love that new blouse on you!’ It is a 71

lazy way of conversing. One might more correctly say, ‘I think that the blouse 72

is very flattering to you’, as it conveys a more exact meaning” (Lena Davies). 73

74

75

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">76

face="Times New Roman">Is love just another buzzword? Can we change the meaning 77

of the words by using them injudiciously?  78

Often we hear people use words like “hate,” “great,” “worst,” “gay” etc. 79

now days and there are times when we get to a point where it is very difficult 80

to make sense out of them. Just like in Gloria Naylor’s essay, “Mommy what does 81

‘Nigger’ mean?” Naylor didn’t recognize the N word until someone outside her 82

family said it to her.  It is very 83

hard to make sense out of words you get used to hearing within certain 84

boundaries.85

86

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">87

face="Times New Roman">In an anonymous quote, “I love to lose myself in other 88

men’s minds. When I am not walking, I am reading; I cannot sit and think. Books 89

think for me,” the author expresses the delight he/she gets by reading 90

imaginative books by using the term love. The quote would be more effective and 91

clear if the author uses some other word like “enjoy,” “relish,” “treasure” or 92

some other word that will give the reader a better meaning of what he/she meant. 93

If love was not such a cliché word we would not know what the author wanted to 94

say by using love in the sentence; but since it is used so much in daily life we 95

automatically know what he/she were talking about.96

97

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">98

face="Times New Roman">Some people claim that love cannot be a cliché since it 99

is a positive term; but isn’t cliché a trite word, phrase or expression? If a 100

word is positive then why wear it out by using it without any solid reason. Here 101

are some of the love phrases we hear everyday: “I love to sleep,” “I love these 102

shoes,” “I hate love,” “I love hate,” “I love talking,” “love hurts,” “love is 103

all you need,” “love you” to list a few. If it is used to commonly in life, how 104

do we know when someone says “I love you” to us, we don’t know whether they 105

really love us or they just are attracted to us. A good friend of mine recently 106

instant messaged me with the phrase “I love you” for a few seconds I had no idea 107

about what he was talking about. He has never said these words to anyone before 108

not even his girlfriend.  I asked 109

him whether he was feeling okay and in response he told me that he has never 110

felt better; he further explained that he has finally figured out what love 111

means to him. For him love meant caring for someone who is very close to you and 112

hence he decided to let me know that he cared for me as a friend. Since, love is 113

so common now days, we assume if a person says “love you” to someone then it is 114

a friend caring for that person and if they say “I love you” then they are 115

attracted to that person.116

117

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">118

face="Times New Roman">Same is the case with the following poem; one doesn’t 119

know what kind of love the poet is talking about till the end.120

121

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt 1.5in; TEXT-INDENT: -0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%">122

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">“I love you not 123

for what you are, 124

but for what I am when I am with you.125

126

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt 1.5in; TEXT-INDENT: -0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%">127

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">I love you not 128

only for what you have make yourself,129

130

style="mso-spacerun: yes"> but for what you are making of me.131

132

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt 1.5in; TEXT-INDENT: -0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%">133

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">I love you 134

because you have done more than any creed135

136

style="mso-spacerun: yes"> could have done to make me good and more 137

than any fate 138

could have done to make me happy.139

140

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt 1.5in; TEXT-INDENT: -0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%">141

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">You have done 142

it without a touch, 143

without a word, 144

without a sign.145

146

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt 1.5in; TEXT-INDENT: -0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%">147

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">You have done 148

it by being yourself.149

150

151

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt 1.5in; TEXT-INDENT: -0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%">152

style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">Perhaps that is 153

what being a friend means, after all.”154

155

face="Times New Roman">(Anonymous)156

157

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">158

face="Times New Roman">This poem expresses how it feels to be around a good 159

friend. It is not necessarily all the qualities of a good friend but this poem 160

does a good justification to friendship and what we like to have in our friends 161

and how they should make us feel. However, if the last line is taken away the 162

poem can be taken as poem for a beloved not for a friend. Since love is such a 163

broadly used term, without proper context no one can understand what it is about 164

or what it means.165

166

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">167

face="Times New Roman">Love by itself holds no meaning; a person needs to use a 168

proper context with it to fully express their feelings in the right manner. In 169

context of religion, love means devotion to God and Humanity, and in the context 170

of country, it means the will to sacrifice one’s self for the country one is 171

living in, similarly in context of friendship, love means caring for another 172

person and being there for them when they need someone. In the same way, when 173

talking about family love means protection, safety, caring and in romance it 174

means passion, desire feeling of being liked as well of all the other kind of 175

love. Without a specific context this abstract word is nothing but an empty 176

placeholder. 177

178

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">179

face="Times New Roman">Since, love can be used in so many places, people now 180

days just assume they can use it for anything they want it to use it for. In the 181

21^st Century with all the latest technology, people have stopped to 182

think for themselves and let the machines do all the work; it is the era of 183

laziness. Therefore, instead of thinking about the proper term to use we tend to 184

use whatever we think will fit in it without giving a second thought about how 185

it will be perceived. That is why when people who don’t know English as their 186

first language have a lot of difficulty understanding what we talk about. True, 187

every generation had its slang but slang ruin’s the reputation of the word as 188

well as its meaning. 189

190

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">191

face="Times New Roman">Love has been so trite that somebody might take it as a 192

negative way. Though, love is a positive word but when people experience bad 193

relationships or get through a breakup they take love in a negative sense and 194

dislike it till they experience the same pleasant emotion again. Just to 195

remember why they started hating “love” in the first place, it’s not the word 196

that hurt them but the feeling and the person’s, who used to use that word, 197

intention; in the end the empty frame called love gets all the blame.198

199

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">200

face="Times New Roman">Rather than turning it into a cliché, love is a word that 201

really needs to be saved for out of the ordinary and important things as well as 202

people we really cherish. It’s overuse has left it like an empty frame that can 203

hold anything people set into rather than those special emotions and feelings 204

that are dear to them. If only people would get over their laziness and use 205

proper terms in their sentences, love and other such words might get their 206

reputation and meaning back. 207

208

style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; FONT-FAMILY: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA">
209

style="PAGE-BREAK-BEFORE: always" clear=all>210

211

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: center" 212

align=center>Work Cited213

214

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">215

face="Times New Roman">Lena Davies216

217

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">218

face="Times New Roman">Little Book of Big Quotes (Wishes)219

220

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">221

face="Times New Roman">I love you 222

for, Little Book of Big Quotes (Friendship)223

224

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">225

face="Times New Roman">Love, What is 226

love, Robert Louis Stevenson227

228

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">229

face="Times New Roman">The Oxford Explanation of Word Origin230

231

style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 0.5in; LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; TEXT-ALIGN: justify">232

face="Times New Roman">Oxford English Dictionary233