Dead Serious

they never expected me
the so called perfect me!
which is what made it so perfect
i told them all
that i was unhappy
that i was angry
and that i was faking almost every time that i was happy
but they didn't care
it couldn't be true
she is just stressing out again
oh but i was more serious than i had ever been
dead serious
i even told them what i was going to do
that was one of the weakest days of my life
the weakest day was when i cried
but that's another story
but yeah
i screamed at them
the whole school
my whole family
everyone that i knew
'Don't you get it! I'm unhappy! I WANT to die!'
but no body listened
i don't even think that they heard
it was almost as if i was already dead
it wouldn't make a difference
so i went home
and killed myself
that was the best day of my life
and i figured
no one will miss me
no one will care
no one will even notice
there will just be an extra empty seat
in every one of classes
but then i got to where ever i ended up
and i could see the world below me
watch everyone in my past life
i thought life would just go on
nobody really knew me
so why should they care
but instead what saw i was
crying
actual crying
but surely they couldn't be crying over me
but i guess that they were
there was a service
i didn't think that there would be one
or that people would come
but they were there
the two came and i wanted to reach out
to tell them to stop crying
then i saw the other two
and i never have seen them like that
crying
worrying
wondering
then i saw him
what the hell was he doing here
he hasn't even looked at me for who knows how long
wait! what's he doing
step away from my body!
omg! he's holding my dead hand
oh no
he's going to see the scars
what is he doing now
a note
he's putting a note in my hand
i wonder what it says
then suddenly a small piece of paper appeared in my hand
the afterlife thing is actually kinda cool
well not so much cool as convenient
i didn't want to open the letter
but i did
i feared mostly what it would say
it even smelled like him
there were tear drops stained on the bright white printer paper
so i just went for it and opened it
it said
in his cute messy handwriting
'i will always love you
and i know that i hurt you
but don't worry
i'll see you soon'
i looked down just in time to hear
the deafening bang
and then i turned around and he was standing here
next to me
like i said, convenient