My day has gone wonderful, joyous, marvelous. I get a phone call, one that I wasn't expecting it to be so devastating. There, on the phone, is my friend Ashley. She's crying, hard. Miserably, hard. I begin to tear, Ashley was a strong girl, she never cried. Ashley lived next to me, I told her that I'd be right over her house. I went into her house and she fell into my arms. There, on the floor, she lay, hopelessly.1
"Emily..." she began, "Died. Died! Died!"2
I blink for a second, I want to pinch myself. No, this.. this can't be true. I hug her tightly as her tears are running down my shoulder. I begin to cry, but I tried to stay strong for Ashley. I couldn't do it. I cried miserably, thinking of all the wonderful times we had together. I cry, and can't stop.3
Emily was the most beautifulest girl. She was so genuine, too. She was on the swim team, number one. She had perfect grades, and everybody loved her. She did nothing wrong, didn't get in trouble, and now. Now. Now. Now, she doesn't even have a chance to get in trouble. She always followed the rules, and just tried to do the best for everybody.4
Why did Emily, such a beautiful girl, have to die... so young?
Author notes
Unfortunately, this is a true story.
Comments
1 - 28 of 28
-
aww Brian you never told me about this? It's so sad...sniff, the story is good though.
-
this is great. and because it is a true story shows how hard you had to work in order to put something like this in writing. great job!
-
I'm very very sorry for your loss. She sounds like a great person. Good write though.
Illuminated *KT*
-
omg, i read the thing about the fire. thats like....wow. *big hug* really sux. it kinda reminds me of the reaction people got when a kid in my school got crushed in his car by a truck. he was drunk, which was strang cuz he was usually a good kid. idk, that just stinks major.
-
i'm sorry for your loss. emily sounded like a great person. beautiful words, but what a tragic story they tell.
♥sarah
-
Thats so sad. how did she die?
-
-
Her house was set into flames... Her mom, dad, grandma, and grandpa died. Her brother escaped but later died in the hospital...
-
-
I'm sorry about your friend. I know how it feels to lose someone special. It hurts, but it lessens with time, trust me. Good story; you conveyed your pain and how Emily effected your life very well.
-
wow, that was really sad. If you ever did to talk I am always around
-
Wow...
This is very touching and sad. I made me cry.
-
That is so sad.
I really feel what you said in that. I hope you feel better soon, and i feel sorry for you.
I don't know what i'd do if some thing like that happened.
-
Oh,I'm so sorry!!How sad...It's very sad that she had to go and I feel very sorry for you..I hope you get better
-
That's so sad :'(! It's just so...so...so sad no words can describe. I would be so horrified if something happened like that to me. I don't know how someone can live through something like that..
-
This is really sad. I'm fortunate enough to have never gone through something this horrible, but the knowledge of it happening so suddenly is overwhelming.
But then, we must realize that this is life. There are no invisible powers pushing everything into place to make it a perfect life. It's not fair, it's not easy, and it's unsure.
It's these times when we can only think of the good times, for those are the reasons for our sadness. She put happiness in your life. As long as you remember her, that happiness will still be there.
Maybe you could to an In Memoriam for her.
-
A young man with a soul....
I have read hundreds of young poets over the years here on AP, mostly girls, it just seems to work that way and to discover a young man with the ability to express the sorrow of a deep felt emotion is rarity, but a welcome one.
I offer this, not as a bright lining to a dark cloud, but as an avenue to explore as time moves on but still the pain lingers.
I have concluded, I think, that art, true art, be it literature or music or painting, seems always to require that the artist suffer and work his way through tragedy and sorrow to bring his art into focus.
There seems to be something about the lonliness of pain that drives us to share the abyss of dark suffering with others.
Happy, content, satisfied people seem seldom to create great masterpieces or even art above the mundune.
Thus, young Brian, welcome to the real world and keep your chin up....don't give an inch to anyone and don't expect to be given leeway for your errors and mistakes, for you will make many and fall, again and again. Get up and do it all over again kid, Good Luck!
Amicus...
-
Wow this was so touching. I hope that your doing better now after dealing with such a tragedy. I agree with the other comments as well stay strong and hopefully things will start looking up for you soon
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
-
Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss and unfortunately words are not enough. I understand this more than people would think and know that being strong is the only thing you can do in cases like this. Good people die young, that's what my daddy said. It's a beautiful piece, and it definitely rises emotion to the read. Great work, I'm off to read more of yours.
-
Amazing.
You know how they say that the good die young? They're right, but she'd want you to be happy. Keep your chin up! =D
-
-
Thanks -- that helps.
-
-
I'd hope so, I've been through a lot of deaths in my family, so I know what it's like. Keeping your chin up makes you stronger. Crying's okay every once in a while, but remember the good things about her.
-
-
Yeah, I try to. But when ever I think about her I can't help but cry...
-
-
Well, the pain will ease away and you'll be able to tell people that yeah, she's gone, but she was the best friend you ever had and she was all around amazing without crying. It took me 2 years to be able to say that about my mom's death.
-
-
I'm sorry about your mom :\
And thanks again! -
-
It's fine. And no problem.
Anything I can do to help others makes me happy. =D
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Omg your going to bring me in tears. R.I.P. Emily. I know she's in a better place now watching over you. She's your Guardian Angel and she's proud that you wrote this. I really like this. And I like how you repeated now. Now. Now. Now, It gives a great affect to the story. Also in the last line, it should be Why did Emily, not Why. did Emily, true to say it outloud and pause at the commas. It ruins the flowness. But anyway im not gonna go all editorial. This is truly a great piece and I know that you grew strong from this event. Keep writing more pieces.
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
-
-
Thanks.
-
-
They say the good die young and from the evidence here, it highly supports it. I'm not sure if the story is true, but you penned it as if it were for the reader. Only problem I saw which was almost nothing is in the following line:
"She was in the swim team, number one."
I think you much rather say she was "on" and not "in" the swim team.
Very good writing with emotion!
Ted E
-
-
Yes, it was true.
-Thanks
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 28 of 28
