No Expectations

The wind blows through my hair as I stand outside in the autumn air.  My shoulder itches as my recent tattoo bleeds black and red ink. Glancing down at my sweater, I peel back the sleeve and look at my past mistakes. My scars telling my life's story.
I walked back inside, away from the cold I longed to be with. The house, empty for the afternoon, did little to soothe my agitated state.  I walked into my room, followed by my small kitten, Skye.  She purred against my feet, wanting attention.  1

Picking up my phone, I called everyone on the list, not surprised when no one picked up.  Sighing, I reached into my desk and pulled out the tiny razor blade hidden in the back of my notebook.  A meow from across the room broke my attention, flushing my face.  I set the blade down and sat on my bed.  A never-ending sleep was all I wanted.  But even the cat wanted me here.  Or did she just want attention?2

Nobody cared, obviously, or they might have picked up the phone.  Grabbing the razor blade, I gently pressed down, watching the blood flow down my arm.  Closing my eyes, I pressed until I lost the strength to hold my arm up.  My phone chirped beside me and I reached to grab it.  Someone knocked on my door and I yelped.  3

"Hey, are you okay in there?"4

Not answering, I grabbed the nearest shirt and tried to cover up my arm.  The door opened and she walked in.  Disappointment crossed her face, followed by concern. 5

"You're not okay.  Let's get you out of here."6

Closing my eyes, I pleaded with my body not to wake up.  I loved her but she didn't care anymore.   Her new boyfriend had taken all that I loved and twisted her into a monster.  Laying limply in her arms, she shook me to wake up.  Letting go of past memories, I felt the weight of the world leave me and listened as the soft autumn night welcomed me with open arms.7