The moon was brightly shining over-head as a young woman pulled up to a quiet park. Looking around for anyone to notice that she was there, she quickly stepped out of her sleek red car, her black dress falling over her thighs; both of them silky smooth. Her ivory white skin, the only brightness seen in the park. Her hazel-green eyes peering down a path she had walked many times before, she flipped her long, brown hair back and walked, high-heeled into the woods.1
The silence of the woods was soothing and uplifting. She seemed to feel at home in this natural environment. Slowly the sound of babbling water rose louder out of the silence of the woods. Walking a trail that seemed used and well traveled, she turned slightly into a less used path, a more natural path, a path leading into the wild.2
The sound of the water, falling, babbling on, slowly growing louder as she came to a clearing in the middle of the forest. A beautiful waterfall lay in front of her as fire flies floated around. She followed the shore of the lake under the falls, and found a path leading under the falls, slid behind and walked on into the darkness.3
The sounds of the waterfall faded and the only sounds were the echos of each step her heels made on the stone floor. Suddenly, she was in another clearing. Looking around, she saw cobble stones leading the way to a small cabin. Dim lights and smoke from the chimney were the only proof of life in the area. Sighing softly, she followed the path. As she reached the front door, there was a note and a small rose attatched to it.4
"My darling, to night is our night. Prepare yourself for a night you shall never forget."5
A small smile appeared on her lips, as she reached to open the door. To her surprise, it opened up. She looked up, shocked, only to look into two, black, haunting eyes. Blinking once, she relaxes and realizes that it is only her love there in front of her. A moment passed as though time had stopped.6
Taking her hand, he leads her inside. His strong, sensual body came into view as her eyes adjusted to the dim candle light of the room. Closing the door behind her, he wrapped his arms around her, nuzzling his face into her neck. Kissing it softly, she lets out a small moan of anticipation. As he bites on her softly, she begins to mold herself to his will, waiting what he has in store for her7
Author notes
I have this on my other AP name (select few have that name) and I decided to put it here so I can get my comments! 
thanks for reading
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
-
those rendezvous touch when we least expect them...
yet they hold what makes us smile in through the day!
I did enjoy this!
Keep penning on one stroke at a time!
Bill -
wow...that was a great beginning...i usually don't get too into stories, because i lose interest in them quite fast, but i dunno, this was differnt...it kept me reading, waiting to see what was coming next, and then i got to the end...right when it was getting steamy, and it stops...lol...go figure...when are you posting the next one? lol, hopefully soon, when you do, give me a heads up...great job on this...if you couldn't already tell from all that i put, i loved it.
christina -
awsome...... i cant wait for part two. You built the story up very well. Very descriptive. Again really good job and I cant wait to read part two
-
Well........I am glad I read this in the morning rather than late at night, Or maybe it's just my wife that is glad. It is too close to time to go to work to do anything about this right now. lol I will watch for part two to come out soon I hope. good write. It hints of something wonderful about to happen.
-
teasingly wonderful begining
oh i bet the next part is going to be real good,and i hope there is mayhaps a third and forth !!!
cheers -
that's beautiful. and very descriptive. it depicts a wonderful picture in my head. you have a true talent.
-
grammar eh? lol
dearie... i like it hehe i hope you write with experience from your own secluded rendezvous, very romantic i suppose lol... It's lovely enough little tale about her journey through the woods and past the waterfall to her lover. hehe
but!! there's a bit to said about your grammar... hehe i'm sorry honestly, i kept finding mistakes and it took away from the story. Don't think me a loser, it's good stuff, it has suspense and plot; it needs a bit of polishing perhaps.
ok... i'd use a red pen, but it doesn't wipe off my moniter very well, but pardon the editor objectiveness.
got out of her car. (add period) her black dress slid back down over her silky smooth thighs. her.... WAS only light to be seen (no comma) the next sentence runs on for two miles, lol, and needs to be reworked and broken in two
the first paragraph was the only one needing much work, the rest wasn't too bad, but you could double check it again please as you write like a poet and run risk of run-ons all over
fireflies is one word and they are sooo beautiful you could expand to more detail to them
the only other thing i noticed was the fact that you switched from past tense to present midway through the second to last paragraph. was that on purpose? one or the other!!
Personally though, i like present tense, because it's more exciting sometimes. Yes, a bit harder to write, but worth it to go for something different. especially for mystery and erotic. I hope it gets spicer then this in the sequel lol.
I'm going to remember that phrase for the note on the door for my lady friend
Thanks for sharing, hope you don't take my critique as anything but suggestions lol... 
take care sweetie
gooday
phil -
very good awaiting part two... I too think a hidey hole behind a waterfalls is a cool thing.
s Roger
-
Ooh. I liked this. Sent shivers down my spine. What a cool place for a midnight rondevous (sp?) I wish I had a secret hidey hole behind a waterfall. I've always wanted to go down a cave behind a waterfall, but all I ever found was wet rock, and wet me! lol
Adding your comment:
1 - 9 of 9
