Name: Ara Ventic
Race: Unknown
Born: Romaina, 1690
Age: 318
Height: 5'6"
Weight: 112 lbs
Eye Color: Ice Green
Hair color/ length: Black and Mid Back
Married Status: Single1
I am Ara Ventic. I was born in 1690 in a small town in Romania. I grew up mostly by myself expect for my older brother Vince who was like my watcher. Our mother died shortly after my birth it was a tragic accident or so my brother has told me so many times. Our father... well who knows what happened to him he never came back after the war. You can learn alot in the streets, no matter how poor a society it mit be. I was a street rat to any other Romanian, I had no family really and we bearly made it past the winter months most years. My brother taught me everything that I knew up to this point. Our family wasn't poor or a lost cause till I was born in fact my brother had the best school they could get him.2
I lost my brother some years ago to a sickness that spend from rats we lived with. I miss my Vince dearly although along with his death I met someone very amazing he was some what of a dream in which I thought I had died and found peace at once. He lived in the outskirts of Romania, his family was wealthy and it didn't seem like there was any reason why he should talk to a street rat like me. His eyes glowed in the mist of the night as if there was some light source in the dark alley he found me in. I learned him name later on it was Driretan Van D; He showed me a whole new life that lead me way from the darkness I knew of the streets and in to the darkness of the world. He changed me and he became my light, something my brother never was. Driretan never married me and never loved me as he should have or how I would have liked. I lefted him in 1780 and moved to the new world, what they now call America and have lived there ever since wandering in the darkness trying to find my light again hoping Vince will one day come back to me. I am the knowledege holder of the world and contuine on the hunt for more.
A contest entry
- Bios by Mel-the-Believer.
100 points, ended February 19, 2008, 16 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Hey...this was great! I found that i wanted to read more when it was over...find out more. You have some sentence structure problems, but i guess with a character description it doesn't really matter. Very well done...Enjoyed immensly! Bravo!
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This character has a very interesting biography, I wonder how the actual story would take place. On the other hand, the phrasing needs to be tweeked up a bit. Don't be afraid to break up sentences, so your thoughts sound more complete. There were also a few mispelled words, but they were probably nothing more than typos. Otherwise, good imagination!
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I like the way this character sounds. It sounds like some thing i would want to use in my story L.S.A.D.H... Great description
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Sounds like a really interesting character. Does sound cool. Thank you so much for entering. Good luck. God Bless!
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It's an amazing story but there are some grammar errors that need to be fixed.
Other than that I really liked it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hope to read more!!! ^_^
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wow interesting
now i'm hooked and wondering where this may lead. Very good writing with some editing needed. But your on the right path. Although I don't think Vince will be coming back. Then again a good writer will figure a way somehow.
Keep it up this is very interesting. Good Luck with your goals of college.
beginning: 4, language: 3, plot: 5, ending: 3, dialog: 3, characters: 4.
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