Losing Something

"Where are you, Karlie?" Lucy screamed.1

Karlie heard, but didn't answer. It was sunrise, but still a little bit dark, and the big twisted old tree gave her good cover to hide in.2

Karlie realized she'd knocked something over when she left the house and woken up her sister, but how did she know Karlie would come to this spot. Lucy was seventeen and as far as Karlie knew only cared about herself and her boyfriend and Myspace. 3

The morning was still and quiet. Well, quiet except for Lucy walking about and shouting for her trying to find her. That definitely wasn't what Karlie would think was quiet.4

"Well, I guess it's time to go back to the house," she sighed quietly to herself, then called out. "Lucy? I'm here!"5

She heard a scream, and her heart stopped. Karlie spun on her heel and saw Lucy's hands holding on to the side of the ledge. It had rained last night and it was slippery on the ledge, and as Karlie ran over to help her sister, she felt a chill run through her spine both for Lucy's and her own safety. She nearly lost her footing and screamed so loudly that for a moment she could hear nothing else, just her fear in her voice that made her feel like nothing else mattered at that moment.6

But she got back on her feet. "Grab my hands, Lucy!" 7

She did and Karlie suddenly felt sixty kilos of extra weight pull her down flat onto the rock. She heard a creaking sound and realized-8

The ledge was breaking. 9

Suddenly she became frantic, trying her hardest to pull Lucy up before it broke, but it was useless, she was too heavy. Karlie knew that it was only a matter of seconds before the ledge broke and she had to decide if she and her sister would die or if she would save herself. 10

She'd made her decision.11

"I'm sorry, Lucy," Karlie whispered, her eyes full of tears, and it seemed to be in slow motion that her hands let go of Lucy's and she fell. Karlie ran for the steady part of the rock and watched with her heart pounding at a million miles a minute as the ledge broke off and the realization settled in that she had basically killed her own sister.12

She hated herself for coming to sit under the tree that morning and waking her sister up.13

She ran back to the house with her eyes full of tears, hoping that every time her feet hit the ground it was hurting it, hurting something, making it feel what she felt at that moment. 14

She ran into the house, and saw her mother at the kitchen table, drinking coffee and staring at her.15

"Did you go to the rock again this morning?" she asked casually. "Lucy must have gone with you, she wasn't in her bed this morning."16

"And she never will be again, Mum!" Karlie screamed. "She's dead! She fell off the cliff and she died!" 17

And she broke down in tears after saying this, and her mother came over to her and made Karlie look her in the eyes and said, "How did this happen?" in a very quiet voice. 18

"She came looking for me and she slipped. It's all my fault, so I don't care if you blame me for it!" Karlie screamed.19

And Karlie ran up to her room, threw herself onto her bed and cried.20

*21

After three days of barely having left her room, Karlie's mother, Kari, came in the room with Karlie staring aimlessly out her window as she had been doing for so long.22

"Karlie?"23

"What do you want?" Karlie snapped back.24

Kari sat down on Karlie's bed. "Come sit next to me."25

Karlie grudgingly got up and shifted onto her bed. 26

Kari looked enquiringly at her. "Do you know what the last thing Lucy said to me the night before she died?"27

"What?" asked Karlie, genuinely interested.28

"She told me that the greatest thing in life that people are able to do is stand and fight on their own two feet, and I know that if she knew she was going to die, she wouldnt have wanted you to do what you're doing at the moment, Karlie."29

Kari was struck by the fury in Karlie's face as she said, "It was my fault, how the hell do you want me to feel?"30

"Lucy followed you because she loves you, Karlie, and it's disrespect to her memory for you to be doing this to yourself. Sitting in this room, not eating anything, not saying anything to anybody. You aren't doing anybody a favour."31

"I know, Mum," and Karlie broke down in tears, and Kari cried with her, both crying for someone they'd loved who they'd lost, both crying for somebody remarkable who could have been even more than that. 32

*33

The next day was Lucy's funeral, and the sadness in the air was real. Karlie had been to funerals where people were pretending to cry and be sad, and didnt really feel anything for the person who had died.34

Everyone here cared about Lucy.35

Which made Karlie wonder, what if their roles had been reversed? What if it had been Karlie that fell off the cliff and not Lucy? Would everyone here still care?36

"And now Miss Karlie Mitchell will give a speech about her sister," the priest announced, and everyone looked to her.37

A speech? What speech?38

Oh right, that speech. The one she'd agreed to do with her mother. The one that she knew she'd stuff up.39

Karlie stood up the front and looked at the microphone instead of the sea of faces.40

"My sister was Lucy Katharine Mitchell."41

"She was the most inspiring person I know. She never got mad at me the way I got mad at her. She always took care of me. She was one of the best people,one of the most beautiful people I know.42

"People always used to say, when they saw of us in public, that we were a lot like each other. I used to take that as an insult. Now, and I know it's far too late, I realise what a compliment that is.43

"I can only dream of being as loving and as loved as my sister is, of being as special and talented and amazing. And I definitely wasn't such a good sister.44

"I will miss her every day, and regret the choice I made that led to her death. It will haunt me forever, and memories are something you can't get rid of. 45

"I will love you forever, Lucy, and I hope you'll always remember that."46

*47

`THREE YEARS LATER` 48

"What are you going to call the new baby, Mum?"49

Kari looked down lovingly at the little baby that resembled a pink wrinkly spud at the moment. "It's girl, I'll let you name it."50

Karlie didnt even have to think about it. "Welcome to the world, Lucy Katharine."51

THE END52